Chapter 35

To my relief, Christmas break started on Thursday. This gave me the next week off before I had to face the music again. Hopefully everything will have died down by the time school starts up again.





I had been forced to tell my father about the situation seeing as the court date was set. I told him Wednesday night so he heard it from me as opposed to it reaching him. I didn't fill him in on the details and he didn't ask because he sensed that I was uncomfortable. He told me he loved me and that he would refund me the money I already spent on the lawyer and that he would pay for the rest of it. He felt bad I didn't tell him and I must have offended him slightly but he didn't tell me it to my face. Instead he said, "Is that why that boy is constantly here at night? I'm not an idiot, Sylvia. You can tell me these things."



I assured my father that Finn was just a friend who was there for me when I needed him most. Besides, my father already knew Finn because we went to the Olympic trials together. They had only shared one brief conversation that I was aware of. Despite my fathers absences, I still loved him with all my heart and we still had a close relationship. Since my mother passed we had gotten used to depending on one another.



I didn't have a lot of other family members so Christmas and Christmas Eve was strictly the two of us. I enjoyed my time away from the drama with my father. We decorated the tree last minute on Christmas Eve and stayed up watching my mother's favorite Christmas movies. She had always been the one to play Christmas songs 6 months a year and that was only one of the things I missed about her, no matter how much I loathed her music in the moment.



On Christmas morning we had cinnamon rolls and traded gifts. I had gotten my father the new fishing pole that he had been eyeing and he gifted me with a pair of tear drop shaped diamond earrings and a matching silver chainmeal watch. The earrings were the same ones he had gifted my mother their first Christmas and I burst into tears when I received them.



My father worked long hours and was often away from home but he did it to provide for me and I appreciated it.



That day we visited my mothers grave in Upstate New York. She wanted to be buried with her family so we had flown here for her funeral all those years ago. After that we went out to a nice dinner and called it a night.



The next two days drifted by slowly since all my friends were busy with their families. Imagine my surprise when there was a knock at my door at 9pm on Monday night. I dragged myself away from the TV to the front door. Surprise, surprise, my father was working late again. When I opened the door I saw a distraught looking Finn standing in front of me. He wore a white T-shirt and his black adidas trainers with his black converse. I could tell by the one white sock and one black sock in combination with his messy hair and slightly glassy eyes that he left wherever he was in a rush.



I quickly pulled him into the warm house and out of the frozen December air. It had yet to snow but that didn't mean it wasn't well below freezing. I swear two weeks ago it was 60 degrees and now it's 15. "What the hell are you doing wearing only a T-shirt? Did you walk here?" I asked incredulously when I closed the wooden door and noticed his car wasn't in the driveway. "You are an idiot." I responded for him and went to grab the blanket I was just curled up under.



Finn didn't bother me with a response as I left the atrium briefly and returned with the fleece blanket. I draped it over his shoulders and walked into the kitchen. "Do you want a coffee or a cocoa or something? I have tea too."



"I'll have a tea please." He muttered in a barely audible tone. I had never seen Finn act like this but here he was; sitting at my island covered in a beige blanket, looking like he had just been through hell. All he did was stare at the white countertop. He ran his right hand through his hair once our twice while I heated the water in the microwave before dropping a tea bag in and waiting for it to brew.



"Finn, what happened?" I asked softly. I didn't know how to console him without pushing him. He stayed quiet for a moment before speaking without meeting my eyes.



"My mother came back." He stated simply. I waited for him to continue and he did eventually. "She wanted to check on her 'family'," he laughed bitterly for a moment. "Did you know she waiting until after Christmas to come see us because she was too busy with her real family."



I didn't say anything because I didn't know what to say due to my lack of knowledge about the situation. Finn looked up and must have seen the confused look on my face because he started to explain the situation. "They got the divorce two years ago." I remembered that part but I didn't know anything else. "Turns out she had been cheating on my dad for three years. The whole thing came to light when she was pregnant and it wasn't his. She's married now. Three kids. A two year old and a set of newborn twins."



My eyes when wide when he wasn't looking but I quickly pulled myself together and handed Finn the mug of tea. "Why did she come back?" I asked softly.



Finn took a sip of the tea and scoffed. "You mean why'd she leave her loving family in New York to come here? She saw us on the TV. Olympic trials. Came to 'congratulate me'. Turns out she just came to beg my dad for money because she lost her job and her husband's a cheater too. She came crawling back when everything fell to fucking pieces." He seethed while his grip on the mug tightening. With his strength, I was surprised he didn't shatter the ceramic. "Then she had the audacity to offer me a chance at meeting my siblings after my dad and her got into an explosive argument."



"I'm sorry, Finn." I said in a soft voice as I leaned over the counter. We sat across from each other but I kept some distance so he didn't feel like I was pestering him.



"Don't say you're sorry. You know better than anyone how that feels when it isn't someone's fault." He muttered. I couldn't argue with that and I mentally scolded myself for saying it when I knew better.



"Finn? Why did you come here?" I asked quietly. The way I asked was kind, not accusing. I'm sure he got what I was asking.



"I couldn't stand to be around her. I felt like I could trust you the most." When he spoke this time, his eyes pinned me in place.



"I'm glad." I responded honestly. I took his free left hand across the counter and he didn't fight it. He let me move my thumb back and forth on his hand soothingly. "Why don't you want to see your siblings?"



"I don't know. It probably sounds selfish but I don't want to be around anything that has to do with her. Even when she lived with me, we weren't close."



"It's not selfish. It makes sense." I whispered in response. A thick silence filled the air as we both got lost in thought. I felt bad but I wouldn't pity him. Pity was one of the worst things to receive and I knew that first hand. Some people thrived on it but I knew Finn wasn't that type.



"She's staying the night and I just didn't want to be near her. Can I stay over tonight?" He asked after a while. His voice was hesitant like he thought I was going to kick him out. I almost scoffed.



"Of course. You don't even need to ask." Truth be told, Finn still slept over at least twice a week. It had become somewhat of a habit that we would hang out after practice most nights and he just ended up staying over. With both our fathers always working, it got lonely so we turned to each other for company. The fact that he only lived five minutes away also helped. Most nights we made dinner together at each others houses before doing our homework and heading home.



I slept at his place sometimes too, but not as often. Besides, half Finn's shit was already here to begin with. My nightmares had become more infrequent much to my relief. They happened around once a week but I didn't wake up screaming in tears. I usually just jolted awake. After a minute of calming down I could usually fall back asleep. Sometimes Finn was there and we would stay up and talk and sometimes he wasn't so I would go back to bed. Either way, I was thankful he trusted me enough to show up here when he was feeling vulnerable.



I know it took a lot to be like that around other people.



"Do you think your father will give her the money?" I asked softly. I didn't want to upset him further.



"No doubt. He's a softie. Of course he will. He might even let her get close to him again until she drives the knife back into his heart." Finn said bitterly. "I hate her. My father was always a loyal man. He practically worshiped the ground she walked on only to find out she lied to him for three years. Come here. I need a hug." I couldn't help but smile to myself when he said that. I stood from the counter and walked around to where he sat.



Finn pulled me into the warmth of the blanket and his body while picking my fat ass up and putting me on his lap so my legs were laying sideways across his own. I wrapped my arms around him as he did the same and rested his head on my shoulder. "Good thing she didn't bring those God damn kids. I might have forgiven her on the spot. Little kids are my weakness." He said to no one in particular. I think he was just talking to talk now.



"That's good to know, for future reference." I laughed lightly.



"And why would that be?" I didn't miss the insinuation in his tone.



I snorted and rolled my eyes even if he couldn't see it. "For when we inevitably get mad at each other, I'll just find some little kids and then you'll forgive me."



"Let's avoid any scenario that leads to you kidnapping random children." He suggested.



"I wouldn't worry about that too much. I'm not the biggest fan of little children at this point in my life. Maybe it will change in the future." I replied honestly. I never really liked children but people always told me that I would change my mind when I get older. I'm not so sure.



"That's fair enough. Tell me about your mother." Finn suggested.



"Are you sure?" I asked hesitantly. That probably isn't what he needed right now.



"Yeah. You never talk about her. Tell me: what was she like?"



A smile worked its way into my face as I thought about her. "She was kind and bright. She loved Christmas music and cooking. She was a chef so we were always in the kitchen together. Before she died from breast cancer, we always used to watch cooking shows in her hospital room. I was eight when it happened but I still remember her like it was yesterday. She met my father when she was working at a fancy restaurant that his company was having an executive dinner at. He wanted to meet the chef so he did. They got married a year later, it was all fast for them. They had me another year later and we moved to California when I was five." I talked about my mom like it was a dream. She was the sunshine in my father and I's life.



"I love the way you smile when you talk about her." Finn murmured. I hadn't realized it but he had pulled his head away from my neck to look at my face when I rambled about her.



I smiled again. "You know those earrings I got for Christmas?" I asked him, dumbly forgetting that I was wearing them. He was quick to point that out with a smirk. I rolled my eyes before I responded. "Yeah, these ones. My dad gave them to her for their first Christmas together."



"They're beautiful. Perfect for two beautiful women." He responded and I blushed, not sure how to respond to that. I had a small crush on Finn for a little while now but I never had an inkling of an idea about reciprocation. I wouldn't push it though. "I got you a Christmas gift. Actually, I'm surprised you haven't found it yet. It's been hiding in the back of your desk for a week now."



He surprised me when he stood from the stool holding me bridal style. I yelped in surprise as he laughed at me and my hands when around his neck in an instant. He carried me up my stairs, leaving the blanked on the stool in the kitchen. I frowned and furrowed my brows. "I never go in my desk."



"I know. Why do you think I put it there?" He answered with a smirk. I was glad he seemed to be feeling better now. Or at the very least he was distracted for the time being.



When we reached my room I flipped on the light as Finn walked past the doorway and set me on the bed before opening the light wooden door to the modern white Ikea desk. He produced a small box covered in a gold metallic paper. Finn handed it to me and leaned against the desk while crossing his ankles. He gestured for me to open it so I did.



"I could have gotten you something sports related but that seemed to obvious. I almost went the Dead Kennedys route but that seemed a little easy too." He spoke as I unwrapped the small gift revealing a black velvet jewelry box. "I know you're not much of a jewelry person but I thought you needed a reminder of sorts."



I opened the velvet hard cover box to reveal a beautiful silver necklace. The pendant on it was a Celtic Teiskelion inside a twisted silver circle that looked like a tiny metal rope. There was a diamond set in the center of the symbol that looked gorgeous in the silver pendant.



I looked up in surprise as Finn started to speak again. "I'm not sure how up to date you are on your Celtic mythology, but this means strength and perseverance. I thought it fit well because you've been through so much in more ways than one and you keep going forwards. That's why the three spikes turn to the right. Most jewelry pieces actually face the wrong way. The forwardness shows resistance. It's literal meaning is 'the will to move forward despite adversities'."



My mouth was wide open now. "Finn this is beautiful. This honestly means so much."



"You were always telling me how you felt vulnerable or like you wouldn't make it. After everything you've been through and done; making it on a men's team, your moms passing, putting up with my shit, going to the Olympic trials, the rape, the multiple school incidents; I just think you needed a remember that none of the people around you have done any of that and yet you're still charging ahead."



I was on the verge of tears now. "Hug me, you idiot!" I said as the tears threatened to fall. I was smiling so big my cheeks hurt. Finn rolled his eyes and laughed before pulling me into a hug.



I accepted and he whispered "Merry late Christmas, Sylvia."



When he pulled away, I stood from my plush bed and moved to my closet. "I got you something too but it is defiantly not as great as yours." I laughed and pulled out a box from my closet.



I handed the teal blue wrapped gift to Finn he carefully unwrapped it as I started to speak again. "I know you're into actual records based on your collection and I noticed you were missing two or three of the good ones. So here you have it; A signed Frankenchrist, a signed Give Me Convenience or Give Me Death. And last but not least; the rare Misfits Bullet vinyl."



Now Finn had wide eyes and a grin on his face. He wasted no time in tackling me into a hug as I laughed. "Merry Christmas to you too."



"I literally can't believe you got the Bullet album from the Misfits. I don't even want to know how much that was." Finn said as he pulled away.



"But we all know Frankenchrist is the best one. You better not argue me on that."



"Wouldn't dream of it."