Chapter One-hundred-and-two Evan Sterling’s POV (Twelve Weeks After The Wedding)

I felt Estera's hand slowly slip into mine as we drove through the Sterling Estate gate. I opened my hand wide, giving her room to interlace her fingers with mine. She leaned across from the passenger seat to rest her head against my shoulder and I stopped the car so I could reach for her. Cupping the side of her face, I made her lift and crane her neck to receive my kiss. I pressed my lips against her forehead then her lips. Kissing her slowly as if we have all the time in the world. She let out a shaky breath when I let her go, gazing lovingly into my eyes.
"Don't be scared. Nothing or no one here can hurt you ever again. I need us both to put this to rest. We had an amazing time here, on this ground and I want us to take that back. Separate it from the nightmare that came after. I hate this place…."
"Evan…" she whispered, raising her hand to cup my chin. I let out a soft chuckle.
"I need to let him stay buried and not continue to hurt us…to hurt me. Please," I said. She nodded.
"I was so scared the last time I left this ground," she whispered.
"I know. I am sorry, my love. You will never have to go through that again. We are here to decide what to do with the place..."
"Your mum doesn't want to come back?" Estera asked. Her voice was soft and sad.
"Nope," I replied, working my jaw. The damn place holds a lot of bad memories and haunting good ones, both my mother and I wanted to bury for good. I put the Jeep back in motion and continued to drive until we got to the front of the mansion.
Without hesitating, I pushed the door open and stepped out, and walked around the car to open the door for Estera. Taking her hand, I helped her out of the car. Smiling as I met her gaze and slowly trailed my eyes down to the gentle swell of her stomach. She wore a short dress and a jacket that was left unbuttoned in the front, showing off the loose dress underneath.
I took a deep breath. The joy in my heart was full. She was pregnant again and this time, I planned to stay by her side through it all. I have everything I desired right from the first time I made Estera mine — she, as my wife -- the mother of my children. The woman I begin my day with and the last one I see before I shut my eyes to sleep at night. A career I loved and peaceful life. I doubt I could ask for more except perhaps erasing the nastiness in our past.
Brian had been on my neck about my intention for the house. A lot of vultures around are inquiring if we wanted to sell it. The Sterling’s name had never really meant shit to me. It was hard to be sentimental about a name given to you by an abusive father. And the detachment grew even worse after what he did to me and Estera. But this wasn’t just about me anymore. This house was also my children’s heritage. And the property is not just like any property. It was a symbol of power. Selling it would be insane. But I would if it would continually be a source of pain to us all.
Hence why I asked Estera to visit the place with me. I figured it might be therapeutic for both of us.
I drew her to my side and felt her arm wrapped around my back. I wore a raglan sleeve shirt over cargo pants, and she slipped her hand under my shirt to touch my side. I took a shaky breath and promptly lowered my face to press a kiss atop her head.
We arrived in Charlestown yesterday morning with the intent to check out the estate and return to New York. But once we got to my condo; our very first love nest, the memories kept us there. It almost felt as if we never left. And I imagined how our lives would have played out if I had said to hell with it and taken her with me to Aspen instead of leaving her with the wolves to devour.
I felt a bit bad that I was keeping Estera away from work and the boys but after video calling home and seeing how well the boys were getting along with Aunt Sophia and my mother, I relaxed a little.
I ushered her up the porch to the front door, taking out the key to unlocking it.
The entire place was so quiet it was unnerving. I doubt I have seen the place this deserted before
We have sent all the domestic workers to the house I bought after my sham wedding with Mary Antoinette Dallas. The place was empty and the only servants left were the men in charge of the horticulture and maintenance.
Pushing the door open, I stepped in first and felt Estera follow me. I had called the servants ahead to let them know we were coming and wasn’t surprised to see the entire place was clean with no sight of a speck of dust. Everything looked the same except nothing was anymore.
I turned and held my hand out to Estera she stepped forward and took it. Walking down the dimly lit foyer, I led her to the most damning room in the entire house – Edward's home office.
We climbed down the stairs and to the entrance door. I opened it and had to tug Estera’s hand before she could come inside with me. The stuffy room carried Edward’s rich cologne. The only light illuminating the room came from the lamp on a table by a side couch.
I heard Estera let out a shaky breath. I could understand what must be going through her head when I turned to hold her gaze, I could almost see the scenes replaying in her beautiful hazel eyes. They were also misty and her breathing was a tad faster. I gathered her into my arms and felt her trembling. Anger welled in me and I silently wished Edward was there with that fucker who put his hands on my woman so I could enjoy bashing their fucking faces in. A voice reminded me Edward was dead and that his death wasn’t a peaceful one. And Seth lost an eye and would be spending the rest of his life, jobless and homeless.
“Shh...” I said, holding her tightly in my arms.
“The worst of it all was not what they had planned, it was knowing I had lost you,” she whispered against my chest.
“But you didn’t lose me...” I rasped, tightening my hold. “You can never lose me, Estera. I love you then, I love you now. And till I draw my last breath and beyond, you will always, always have my heart.”
She let out a shaky breath and her body quivered as she held on tightly to me, gripping my shirt where her hands lay.
“You are my everything,” she fervently whispered. I smiled, drew back and cupped her face.
“As you are mine,’ I replied and lowered my head to nuzzle the side of her face with my lips and nose.
“Sometimes I feel really scared that all these might not be real. That maybe It was all a dream and that you never came for me... for us,” she whispered.
“What made you think I would not come for you?”
“I was practically a child. You could have anybody you wanted,” she replied in a soft whisper.
“I didn’t just want to fuck you, Estera. I had my share of that...” I said. She stiffened in my arms and drew back slowly to glare at me. I chuckled. Picking her up, I carried her to the desk and made her sit atop it. Her anger distracted her from what I did. I was certain if she paid attention to where she sat, she would have freaked out. I was having a hard time of keeping out of my head the damning images of a woman with her profile bent over this same desk, getting fucked by Edward.