Chapter 59

"We need to call the God Squad together,"I announced as I walked into Thor's bedroom.
"Why, what's happened now?"Thor sat up in his chair by the fire; placing a book on the table beside him.
"I just got through with another spirit-walk, and Blue's got a new plan to kill Maria."I shook my head. "What is it with him and that girl?"
"I think mainly; it's that her death will destroy not only Putin's relationship with Medvedev but Putin's mind as well,"Thor sighed. "However, it could also be that once he locks onto a target, Huitzilopochtli doesn't give up."
"It would sure explain his obsession with me."I sniffed in irritation. "Anyway, can you call them all and have them meet us at my place?"
"Sure."Thor stood up. "Wait, why your place?"
"I need to pick up some things and there's food in the fridge I should use before it goes bad,"I said. "Having them over will kill two gods with one sword."
"Maybe lay off on the god-killing analogies when you're living with one, darling."Thor grimaced.
"Point taken."I nodded and headed out to go find my cat. Nick needed some time to prowl the real world.
"And, darling,"Thor called after me.
"Yes?"I poked my head back into the room.
"What's a God Squad?"
...
"Thanks for coming, everyone."I placed the platter of meat and cheese down on the low table in my living room. They all dug in instantly. "And thanks for bringing your appetite."
"Anytime you feel the need to feed people"-Pan waved a chicken leg at me—"I'm your god."
"Well, I didn't want it to go to waste."I sat on the sofa next to Thor. "It's been awhile since I've been home, and I was worried that the meat would go bad."
"No worries with us."Persephone nibbled at a piece of cheese. "You can't give a god food poisoning."
"Oh, I didn't even think of that."I saluted them with my Coke can. "Eat up; I have some sausage I wasn't going to serve, but you're all welcome to it if you'd like."
Enthusiastic grunting was all the response I got.
"So, I noticed that you haven't put up any Christmas lights,"Pan said with a mischievous look.
Horus made a disgusted sound in response; half snort/half choke.
"What; you got a problem with Christmas?"I raised a brow at Horus while Pan giggled.
"It's not Christ's birthday."Horus stared morosely at the floor; the chicken forgotten in his hand. "JC's birthday is in March."
"He's just got a burned butt over it because it's actually his birthday."Pan elbowed Horus, who pulled himself upright like a bird ruffling its feathers.
"December 25 is your birthday?"I blinked in surprise.
I knew the whole Christmas thing was really about taking the Winter Solstice from the Pagans, but I had no idea Horus was involved.
"Horus"-Thor rubbed a hand over his face in annoyance—"get over it. It's been hundreds of years, man. A lot of religions got intertwined; it's no big deal."
"No big deal?"Horus puffed up. "I was called the Lamb of God. I had twelve apostles, and my myths spoke of my crucifixion and consequent resurrection in three days. His stories were my stories first!"
"They called you a lamb?"I squished up my face in horror.
"Among other titles... also stolen."Horus sniffed.
"You were not called a lamb."Thor sighed. "It's been so long that even you don't remember things accurately. And, by the way, everyone thought it was my birthday too."
"Wait, it's your birthday too?"Shoot, I had to get a gift. What does one give their god boyfriend?
"Nah."Thor shrugged. "My people just thought it was. I was born in July."
"Oh."I sighed in relief. Good, I had awhile to prepare then. "Wait, the Vikings celebrated your birthday on Christmas? So, it should really be Thormas?"
"No,"Horus ground out while everyone else laughed. "Haven't you been listening? It should be Horusmas."
"Horusmas!"Pan started to cackle. "You've got to be shitting me! That's fucking hilarious. Horusmas. Happy Horusmas!"
"What's wrong with Horusmas?"Horus inhaled sharply.
"It just doesn't roll off the tongue, now does it?"Pan kept laughing. "Merry Horusmas!"
"I think it has a regal ring to it,"Horus said.
"It almost sounds like whore's a miss."Pan giggled.
"That doesn't make any sense."Horus glared at Pan.
"Oka-a-ay."I blinked slowly. "So, anyway, if anyone's interested, I know Blue's next move."
"Just ignore Horus, Vervain."Brahma shot the Egyptian God a wry look. "We all do. Go ahead, what did you find out?"
"He's planning on murdering Maria when her family goes on vacation,"I announced. Honestly, I was getting tired of saving this woman. "The Putins own a dacha; a little Russian vacation house outside of Moscow. Blue's going to use Medvedev's driver to gun them down on their way to the dacha, but he only intends to kill Maria. He needs Putin alive for everything to work."
"So, we take out the driver?"Thor asked. He had Nick's forepaws on his shoulder and was stroking the cat's back soothingly. Whether it was more soothing for him or Nick, I wasn't sure.
"I'm not down with killing an innocent."I frowned and started stroking Nick. I needed some kitty comfort too.
"He's a potential assassin,"Horus pointed out.
"He's a potential victim,"I clarified. "And I'm not killing a man for something Blue is compelling him to do."
"So, what do we do?"Teharon pondered. "This isn't a bomb or poison we can just remove from the situation. We could protect the family, but that would still leave the driver looking like an assassin."
"We don't have to kill him to stop him,"Mrs. E said simply. "Set a trap for the driver; head him off and grab him right before he reaches the Putins."
"That's one of the reasons why I love you."Mr. T kissed her cheek. "You're brilliant."
"We'll have to hold him until they leave the dacha,"I pointed out. "Otherwise Blue can just have him try again."I dropped my head into my hands and scrubbed my face. "This is going to be endless, isn't it?"
"They won't stay more than a few days, I'm sure."Pan stuffed a piece of roast beef into his mouth and continued talking as he chewed. "I'll look after the dude; it'll be fine. I've got a lot of vodka."
"No, I mean this."I looked up and waved my hand out to include everyone. "Sneaking into Blue's head and trying to prevent whatever horror he's got planned next."An endless line of spirit-walks, invaded dreams, and frantic chases stretched out before me. "When's it gonna end?"
"When he's dead,"Thor said grimly.
"But none of us are powerful enough to kill him."Ull looked around the room and then back at me. He raised a speculative eyebrow.
"I don't think I can kill him either."I shook my head. "So, that means it'll never end. Blue's right; we'll slip up eventually. No one wins all the time. He's going to sneak something by us. Maybe I won't catch it, or maybe we won't be able to stop him in time but either way, he's going to win from sheer perseverance."
"So, do you stop fighting?"Teharon stared at me speculatively.
"What?"I stared back in shock.
"When you know you'll lose eventually"-Teharon lifted one perfect brow—"do you still fight?"
"Of course."I looked at Thor as if maybe he knew why his friend had suddenly gone nuts.
Thor just made an amused sound and shrugged.
"Why?"Teharon planted his elbows on his knees, folded his hands beneath his chin, and stared harder.
"Because giving up is not an option,"I huffed. "Because if I'm going down, I'm going down fighting. Because the bad guys don't get to win that easily."
"But it's not your fight,"Teharon's voice never rose above the level of polite conversation.
"I'm human,"I ground out, "this fight's more mine than it is yours."
"That's right, Godhunter."Teharon smiled as if he'd just taught me a valuable lesson. "It's your fight because you've made it so, and you're not going to stop fighting even when the odds are against you. So, why waste your time worrying about what will or will not be? We have plans to make."
"Okay."I exhaled gruffly. "I'm shutting up now."
"Holy hand grenades!"Ull exclaimed. "You shut up the Godhunter!"
Before I could yell at Ull, "The Devil went down to Georgia"started playing from the vicinity of Persephone's butt. She jumped guiltily, grimacing when everyone stared at her, and then pulled her cellphone out of her back pocket.
"Hey, baby,"she said into the receiver. "Uh . . . nothing . . . no, I'm . . . uh, I'm hanging out with some friends."Persephone swallowed and listened. "This isn't really a good time . . . yes but . . . I don't think that's . . . well, I, uh . . ."
There was a knock at my front door, and Persephone turned to look at it with round eyes before swinging her horrified gaze toward me. I frowned as she started to smile the smile people use when they're just about to tell you something you're gonna want to throttle them for.
The knock came again; louder.
"Persephone."I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "That wouldn't happen to be the Lord of the Underworld at my front door, would it?"
"Maybe."She looked as if she were in pain and when the knock came again, she hid her face in her hands.