chapter 11

Avril sat down in the food court gazing out as she picked at her food. She was absent-minded, of that she was aware. Everything was changing and part of her felt overwhelming while the other half of her was excited. Both emotions twirled around, each one fighting for dominance that made her uneasy.

"You're biting the inside of your mouth." Avril instantly rose to attention as Nate took a seat next to her. She stared at him, her emotions as clear as day on her face until she shook them away.

"I am sorry, you said something?" She questioned calmly even though her heart raced in position.

Nate smiled. "When you're worried or in deep thought you often bite the inside of your mouth and carry that blank expression." he elaborated as simply as if he was relating to her an interesting fact from a book.
Avril felt as though she had been struck. She felt uneasy that the one person who she kept in her heart for two years knew her so well. Her uneasiness intensified by the fact that despite him knowing her, he did not feel the same about her. It was as if the heavens themselves were mocking her. How can someone pay so much attention to her but not love her or even like her? Perhaps she was harboring too many fantasies of romance. His signals felt confusing to her but perhaps she was trying to see something that wasn't there.

"I am just confused but it shall be cleared up soon." She confided.

"Tell me what's wrong, Avril." His expression grave almost as if their emotions were interlinked.
Avril swallowed past the lump in her throat, and she didn't know what it was about the way he called her name that made her entire body tingle. Her heart paused its rhythm for a second, as if it was holding its breath waiting for him, no... begging for him to repeat her name.

"I am just not sure what I want." The words were a sigh, her head automatically bent to gaze at her food. She knew she shouldn't keep opening up to him, her logical senses screamed at her to tell him nothing. However, the years of friendship and comfort she felt towards him made it difficult to comply.
His hands reached out to hers and her body tensed. "you don't need to figure it out right now. How about we try to take your mind off of this?" his eyes searched hers for confirmation.

"What do you have in mind?" The words came out without her permission. It was a reflex to jump at any opportunity to spend time with him and she lowkey hated herself for it.

" Movie?" he shot her that smile again and she dared not refuse.

***********
Thomas found himself looking through case files as a means of distraction. It was safe to assume that should he return to work, he definitely would not be lacking in assignments. The company had multiple high-profile matters that needed to be sorted out and yet he was relaxing. He threw the folder onto the desk in frustration. He should be at work! Instead, his father had him babysitting! He found this utterly atrocious. He vowed not to upset himself further by gazing at more files. In the alternative, he decided to do the job his father did approve of.
He picked up his cell and called Avril, she should be done at the university. She answered on the second ring.

"I'm coming to pick you up." His voice sounded harsher than he intended. He heard her sharp intake of breath, her voice coming to him in fragments as if she wasn't sure what to say. He grew suspicious.

"I am not at the University." She whispered.
Thomas balled his fist and through clenched teeth, he responded, "Then where?" These were the only words he trusted himself to mutter. He could feel the sides of his temple throbbing from his blood pressure rising.

"I came to look at a movie with a friend of mine after I was finished..." her voice trailed off at being interrupted. He didn't wait for her to finish.

"Which theatre? I will come to get you." He'd already grabbed his keys and was making his way outside to his car.

"No!" She all but shouted into the phone.

"No?" he'd stop dead in his tracks. He didn't know the emotion lining her voice but it sounded as though she was hiding something.

"I can get a drop back with my friend, it's not far." she insisted, and then there was silence.

The call dropped and Thomas felt more anger than he ever thought possible. After a few minutes he realized, he had no reason to be so affected. She was nothing to him. Also, who was he to keep tight reigns on a young woman trying to enjoy her life? And yet, he felt as though he was responsible for protecting her. He'd seen too much crap in the world and having to be accountable for a young woman who could attract the eyes of nefarious men made him shudder.
Fifteen minutes later, Thomas saw Avril getting out of a car. Funny...she didn't mention that her friend was male. Thomas stood on the front porch waiting for her to walk up. He viewed the mannerisms of both persons. They were unreasonably cheerful when addressing each other and he felt that anger and annoyance resurface.

"I can only hope that you were safe." The words sped out of his lips like an accusation as soon as Avril was within hearing range.
She tilted her head to the side and regarded Thomas carefully. "I do not understand."

"Where ever it is you had gone and whatever it is you were doing with that boy..." he paused, "I expect that two mature persons took necessary precautions." his elaboration still seemed vague to Avril. She didn't want to make assumptions for fear she was misunderstanding Thomas. She didn't believe that he was accusing her of going off and having sex with Nate, so she decided to ask again...

"I am sorry, but what is it exactly that you're trying to say to me?" She questioned carefully.
Thomas' had surpassed boiling point. This was the third time he would have to mention her tryst and for the life of him, it was making him angry just thinking about the things she'd probably let that boy do to her.

"Having sex, though a very pleasurable experience, but also be practiced cautiously." He tried to keep his anger to a minimum as he said those words.
Avril clenched her jaw and her eyes turned deadly. How could this man, who didn't even know her favorite hobby, dare judge her? And wrongly at that.

"I hadn't known that having a friend who happens to be of the opposite sex would implicate me so." She responded defiantly. "Seeing as you seem to know me and what I do, then I shall leave you with your own thoughts." She began walking past him. She had no desire of explaining herself and her motives to this man. He didn't deserve that or anything else from her.

"Not so fast." He growled, grabbing hold of her arm as she attempted to walk past him. He spun her to face him.

"The hell!" Avril tried to wrench her arm out of his iron-clad grip but he didn't even flinch, he just grabbed onto her tighter.

"What's your deal?' she half screamed at him.

"I don't like to be blindsided, Avril." His face mere millimeters from her own and man did he look furious. Avril could do nothing but stare at him...the anger in his eyes far surpassed the night he'd attacked her when she first came here. She didn't know that was possible, she'd thought she'd seen him at his worst but she was quickly realizing that she was wrong.

"What?" Her entire being confused. For a moment she'd sworn he'd temporarily gone insane.

"I distinctly remember telling you that one of my rules is that you are to inform me of your whereabouts." His voice careful, controlled.
"I-"

"Make no mistake Avril, I do not intend to encourage your tryst with that boy...my father was given charge of you, a burden delegated to me I will not have you involve yourself in activities that may cause my father disrepute."
Avril was undeniably stunned by Thomas's words that at the moment she didn't even feel any anger at his baseless accusations and before she can attempt to speak they were interrupted.

"Is everything alright?" Trish walked up to the front of the house where Avril and Thomas were having their spat on the porch. She eyed them carefully, her eyes fixating on Thomas' grip on Avril.

" Perfect." he replied without looking at Trish. His eyes scorching holes into Avril. When she didn't say anything he violently let go of her arm and stormed inside.
Avril scoffed, she couldn't make eye contact with Trish who was very much in shock. She turned on her heels and made her way inside.

"So much for starting over!" she muttered under her breath. It was only this morning that he'd begun to be at least a bit civil, but now? Perhaps he really was insane.
That night Avril called her parents and checked in, she discussed the classes that interested her and got her parents' input, but a decision was still hanging in the air. She didn't return the missed calls from her friends, her fight...no correction, Thomas' outburst earlier had affected her. Normally, she didn't bother herself with what others thought of her but his words burned her mind.
He'd said she was a burden. She didn't know why that word made her heart ache and the vein at her temple throb.

*********

Thomas opened his door after a few knocks to find Trish standing in front of him.

"Not going to invite me in?" She asked when he didn't move to allow her entrance. He paused for a second and moved out of the way for her to enter and then he closed the door behind her.

"I heard you told Avril that she was a burden to you." Trish cut right to the chase.

"I was upset. Having to be responsible for another human is scary." he defended himself as he walked over to his bed and sat down.

"Do you think that justifies your actions?" she questioned and she was silent. " As scary as it is. It's our job to make her feel welcomed. She has never been away from home before and I am sure this is hard for her. I trust you will attempt to be kinder from now on." Trish gazed at him expectantly and he nodded.

"Dinner will be ready soon. Wash up before you come down. Avril has indicated that she wants to have dinner in her room tonight." She said to make him fully aware of how uncomfortable he made their guest feel. She then exited his room.

Thomas paced his room once she was gone, he ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. Damn was he an ass! He didn't know what had come over him. He'd blown things out of proportion, maybe he was a slave to emotion after all.
Wasn't that a funny notion? The merciless Thomas Lynne couldn't control his emotions. He made his way to her room, the door was slightly open, she sat at the desk, one hand folded under her chin, propping her face and her fingers drumming on the desk. She looked absentmindedly out the window. Something deep inside of Thomas stirred. Why was looking at her worthwhile? He would be content even if she never spoke to him.
Avril wasn't sure how long she'd been lost in thought, nor did she know why she had the strangest feeling as if someone was looking at her. She turned around but there was no one. She peered longingly at the ajar door, uncertain what exactly she was longing for.