chapter 20-new

"Emilia, come on, just come out. "I say, trying to get her. The rain had gotten heavier without me realizing it, and light flashed into the room for a second, showing me her tiny, frail body. I tried to coax her out of the corner under my bed for ten minutes. I managed to get my arms and head under the mattress enough to wrap my arms around her shaking body. I expect her to pull her body away from me, but she doesn't. She lets me wrap my arms around her and pull her out.
I manage to stand up, holding her, and try and put her down just as some thunder strikes outside, rumbling the house. She clings to my body, nestling into me as she shakes.

It takes me a minute to remember how much the thunder scared her when we were younger... I place her gently down on the bed before gently stroking her head.
"Alright, em, explain all of this to me—this isn't you. "I say as she looks up at me with empty eyes. It's like she isn't even here with me. She keeps roaming her eyes over my face. She looks so scared, but the need and sadness I notice in her face have me wanting, not needing, more answers.

"Please, talk to me, Emilia." She pleads at me, her eyes turning a soft yellow. It was the first time in a long time that I had seen her wolf behind her eyes, searching for mine.
"It was so hard, Ryan. It was painful for me to exist. You went then, Jeremy and I was all alone exposed to their hatred and anger for me ." She looks away, focusing on the tough wool of her jumper instead of on me. "The first week after you left was okay. It was the normal stuff. The verbal abuse was non-stop. After a while, I started to throw up daily, and it pissed him off more and more. I promised myself I wouldn't…. I wouldn't let him break me. and then… I'm sorry … I couldn't... I couldn't protect them."

She finally looks into my eyes, and her face softens up. At me, she looks like some spirit has returned but not much. I pull her onto my lap, resting her head on my chest. I sit with my back against the wall; I hold my arms around her protectively.
I knew it wouldn't be good when her eyes began to well again as she choked in her words.

"A few months later. I thought you were dead. I didn't know what to do. My hope started to fade. The little things started to piss them off to the point where I'd get sworn at/ insulted and locked in that place they called a room for even just breathing." She swallows, choking on her cry, before taking another deep breath

"I hadn't eaten in a few days, but I was still throwing up. I wasn't an Idiot; I had missed my period for a couple of months, so I snuck out of the pack for a little while and took a test waiting for that little line on the test. You have no idea how my life changed that day. That little blue line restored my hope. For a moment, I hoped we could be a family. I hoped and prayed you were alive so that I could tell you about our baby. " Her voice shakes as she finishes her sentence.

Oh my god, I didn't know what to think. I sat there stunned for a moment. she had my baby? We could have had a family this time, and I never knew. I started to feel excited about it. My baby, The woman I love, had my baby growing inside her. But I began to think logically for a second. Emilia didn't have a kid hanging off of her, So..... My heart sank as predicted, the worst praying that I was jumping to conclusions. I hold her tighter. Needing her to keep me stable, I need her right now to stop my heart from breaking again.



"That night, your father and mother came home. They were pretty pissed off, and he had come in drunk with the beta and …. Maybe I was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and he came up to me, pinning me against the wall…..he swore at me, calling me my mother's bastard child. He grabbed me, pushing me down to the floor….. He ripped off my top while the beta held my face down. Muffling my mouth as I screamed for help, He taunted me as..... Do you remember that old fire poker from the fireplace? "she says, choking back her tears for a moment, unable to finish her sentence.

She turned away from me. "Look for yourself," She said, lifting her arms for me. I slowly grab the edge of the soft wool jumper, my fingers grazing her bare skin, and pull it up slowly over her head. She sat in trousers and a bra, and all across her back laid thick old scars that overlapped and bulged out along her spine. There were too many for me to count.

My blood boiled, I couldn't help her, and it killed me. I couldn't resist, and I wrapped my arms around her tiny body and rested my head on her shoulder to calm myself. I expected her to squirm away from my touch, but she didn't. Her body caved into mine, pushing herself against me. My wolf wanted to kill him myself, protect her, but I couldn't, and it killed me on the inside.
God, I should have killed him. When I had a chance, those motherfuckers. It sickened every inch of me that I had any relation to that sick and twisted psycho.

" you know, as silly as it sounds, I felt I deserved it after a while. Time went on, and I started losing hope again. I remember that day... when the beta came in and talked to the alpha. About how you were marrying the daughter of the Orion alpha. My heart broke that day, but I still thought you should know. I sent a letter, and that was the biggest mistake I made. She came, Evangelina. That day....... that day killed me. I lost Everything, Ryan, Everything. I spent six months thinking you were dead and then found out you were married. The last thing keeping me alive was the last little bit of you that I had, and I lost that because of them....." She chokes up, not being able to finish as she cries.


If I couldn't feel the guilt rushing through my veins right now, I would be convinced I had died. I had no idea what to say or do. Words at this point were beyond me, and my earlier words that I spit at her like were smacking me all in the face.
I will kill him all of them, For what they have done to them.
"Princess," I say as I nestle my head further to her neck, inhaling her scent.
"Did they take our baby...?" I try to ask softly, but my voice's lethal fury and wolf growling beneath the surface could be seen a mile away.