Chapter 34: The Confession.

She squints her eyes shut, trying to ward off the sunlight that filtered through the curtain. She rolled over to the other side, feeling disgruntled with last night, she groaned for more sleep. If only she could get up and suitably shut the curtain close without the sleep running away.
The door to her room opens and immediately shuts close, carefully not to wake her up. Her heart skipped a bit, recollecting last night's incident and she knew he was the one. They had broken one a of the biggest rule in the contract they've signed—they made love last night, and it was the last thing they'd want to do. What if the lawyer somewhat finds out or what if she gets pregnant? What if…
She felt the weight on the bed and she knew he just sat on the bed. She wanted to pretend like she was sleeping but it was impossible, not now that he was caressing her cheek with his fingers. It felt so good—so good she wouldn't want him to stop.
She heaved a sigh of ease when his hand snaked down to her back and he stroked it. She couldn't hold it—a smile escaped her lips.
'I know you're awake," He told her, his face so close to hers. She opened her eyes and their eyes locked; the recognition; immediate. Deep. Soul-penetrating. Silently, they shared their inner pain. The anger. The self-loathing. Their torment, connecting them. Bonding them. Igniting harmony between them, so timeless, the very universe smiled with satisfaction. She looked down to his body—he was dressed up. Dressed up for work, she thought. But it was a Sunday.
'Oh, yes… I have a meeting to cover up today but I won't stay long. Are you okay? Do you feel any pains? I'm so sorry I… I didn't know how and I wanted to stop…" he tried to explain but couldn't find the right words to come clean for his slipups. He looked tensed and Bushra couldn't help it but somehow feel at ease that he's concerned.
'I'm fine," she said and managed to smile. She had no idea how her limbs were hurting until she tried sitting up right. She winced in pain.
'No, just lie down. I should call a doctor, right?" He panicked instantly as he fetched for his phone in his blazer pocket. She could see the instant regret in his eyes. He shouldn't have forced himself on her. He shouldn't have come back into her room when he could just fight his heart from talking him into going for his desires.
He shouldn't have agreed to that contract…
'No, no! That's not necessary. I will be fine the moment I take another hot shower and some pain killers," she assured him as she rested her back on the bed headboard. She hugged the quilt to her chest so dearly as though he was going to snatch it away from her.
'Do you need help with that?" He asked her, unhappy lines etched up on his face. She shook her head, 'You'll be late for your meeting."
He glances at his wristwatch and nodded, 'Right. I'll be on my way now, I guess. If you need anything, call me. I will be back in few hours, in sha Allah." He got off the bed and straighten his blazer. She watched as he heads to the door and closed the door behind him.
She let out a long sigh of relieve when his footsteps faded away. His cologne and piercing gaze were messing up her mind and obstructing her from thinking straight.
Carefully, she got off the bed and limped to the bathroom. She took her time in the bathroom before she finally sauntered out and dressed up.
She ordered breakfast and it arrived same time as the room cleaner. She wanted to clean her room before the maid arrived but it was too late. They've made a lot of mess in her room and she felt as though the maid would know what they did. What if she does realize what they've done? She can't tell they did, can she? Bushra knew she didn't experience any bleeding, so she was sure there's no stain on the bed—she hopes.
She had her breakfast and went back to her room when to pick up her phone. She went to his room instead and laid down. The pillows smelt like him—everything smelt like him in the room. It made her tummy to churn with apprehension.
She checked her phone to see a bunch of missed calls from him, Yasmin and also Madina. She knew why he was calling. Yasmin was calling because she promised she'd visit them and stay the hold day as they were going back to Nigeria in less than a week. Madina was calling to hear about the previous event—she could wait.
She dialed Yasmin's number first. 'Hey, Yasmin." She could hear Adila's wails from the other end. 'Adda Bushra, I've been calling you all morning. Are you coming? Oh Ya Allah, your food will be ready now, Adila." Yasmin was tensed that she ended up ending the call. Bushra chuckled softly and shook her head.
She called Mahir, knowing he'd call again any moment if she doesn't call back. He picked up after few rings.
'Hey, how are you feeling?"
Her lips curved upwards as her heart warms up. She didn't know why she was feeling that was. She didn't like it but she doesn't have any choice—and it felt so good the way he makes her feel. Even though they still didn't see eye to eye. 'I am much better now. I took some pain killers after having breakfast." She told him. She heard when he heaved a sigh of relieve, like he has been holding his breath until she gave him the answer he wanted to hear.
'I'm glad you are. So, it looks like… I'll be here for a bit longer than I expected. But I will be back as soon as I've cleared things out." He spoke to her in a low tone, as if speaking loudly or in his normal voice would hurt her. He sounded so anxious and down casted. Like he was afraid if he didn't say the right words, he'd hurt her.
'It's okay, just focus and take your time. I also have things to do," she said to him. She had purchased some news books that arrived yesterday morning. She couldn't wait to get her hands on them, feel how new it is and how it smelt so good. She'd also cook dinner for them instead of ordering from the kitchen. She had never cooked ever since they came to New York. She wanted to cook something for them since they have almost everything. She'd just need to grab some things later in the evening.
'You'll be fine on your own for the whole day?" He asked her and she nodded as if he could see her. 'Affirmative," she confirmed and he bid her goodbye before ending the call.
**
She drops the grocery bags on the kitchen island and settled down on one of the stools in the kitchen. 'Oh Allah," she mouthed, wincing in pain. Her body was still sore and she had a throbbing headache—it still didn't stop her from wanting to cook dinner for them.
It was already past 6pm and he had told her he'd be back by 8 or 9pm. She hadn't told him she was cooking—she knew he'd never agree with her idea of even lifting a finger, left alone cooking.
Bushra never welcomes the idea of lazing around and doing nothing when there are lots of productive things to do around. Especially in their suite; she could decide to water the plants or use the sauna or go to the spa.
Going to the spa is also something productive, she declared. And she has been wanting to go there but was so occupied with Yasmin and Adila—Mahir…
She stood up and grabbed the first grocery bag as her stomach flutters with butterflies. She hated herself for how much she has been thinking about him lately. It was bothering her that she always had him in mind. Possibly because they live together and she sees him every single day of her life.
Maybe that wasn't the reason…
She brought out the stuff she bought and began cooking. She was cooking spaghetti and meatballs. It was super easy and fast to cook, and it wouldn't take her up to an hour to cook it.
She was halfway done when the front door opens. She quickly glances at the wall clock—it was fifteen minutes to eight. She turns around when the kitchen door opens and he appeared. He looks at her to the gas cooker. 'You're cooking?" He asked, tilting his head a bit. The look of worry instantly over took his face.
'Yes, its spaghetti and meatballs. I'm just tired of eating the hotels food so I decided to cook," she spoke as she approached him. He stared at her intently as if he could see through her. She looks up and she instantly read his expression. 'I'm fine, I promise. I took some pain killers and even took a nap afterwards," she told him and gave him and assuring smile.
He breaths out and loops his arm around her waist and pulled her closer. 'where did you get all these ingredients?" He asked looking behind her.
She could feel his fingers tracing her back, making her to lose focus on what was happening around her and what he was saying to her. She closed her eyes for a moment as her breath hitched. 'I… the supermarket. I used Google map…" she managed to speak out.
'Hmm," he nodded and let go of her. She lets out a short sigh and moved back to the stove. He followed behind her as he folds his long sleeves. 'Can I help?" He asked, standing right beside her. He watched as she fried the meatballs and his stomach groaned. The aroma filled his nostrils, causing more damage to his hunger.
'You just got back and I know you must be tired. So, go take a shower and rest. I'll be done in less than half an hour, Okay?" She said to him. She had her eyes on what was doing but her whole attention was with him. He was standing so close. His cologne doing wonders in her tummy, causing a whole chaos—the type of chaos that you wouldn't want it to end. Butterflies…
'Ouch," she yelped in pain when her hand encountered with the sizzling pan. She grunts, holding the place she burnt herself. 'And you want me to leave?" He said, grabbing her hand to take a look. 'You really didn't have to go through all this, Bushra. You're sick and in pain, now you've burnt yourself," he spoke worriedly. He blew air on the spot that had reddened with burn.
'I just…" she started and pursed her lips. She watched as he kissed the place and soothed it. 'Ouch," she winced, making him to panic more. 'come here," he uttered and pulled her to the sink.
He turned on the tap and placed her hand under the running water. He held her hand under the water, as he stared at her to read her expression. He felt sorry for her and guilty for what he had her go through. There was much on his mind that he doesn't even know where to start with.
What if she asks him for a divorce and they split up? What if she gets pregnant? What if the lawyer finds out? Why did he agree to the contract at the first place? Why didn't they just get married and learn to live with each other?
Now deep inside of him he was feeling otherwise about the contract and they only had nine months left.
'The meatballs," she utters breaking his reverie. He blinked back to reality and gazes at her. 'Oh crap," he murmured and hurriedly went to the pan. 'How do I…" she grabs the tongs and picked up the meat out of the pan and placed them on the plate she reserved for it.
They finished cooking together and arranged it at the dining area. He took a shower before they had dinner together.
Later that night, they were at the living room watching a movie Bushra was watching before he joined her. Both minds and attention far away from what was happening before them.
He had so much to say—she could sense it. She wanted to speak out also but preferred to hear what he has to say.
'So…" he started, not looking at her. He had to blurt it out, maybe he'd feel at ease when he does. 'What's next," he said to her as he finally set his eyes on her. She takes her eyes off the TV and settled them on him. 'What?" She asked him despite knowing what he meant.
He wanted to know what they do next. Do they just let it slide and avoid it from happening again or they come clean?
But why would they? No one has to know… even though there was a fine to be paid if contract was breached so there was no way she'd let the lawyer know about the incident. Heck, she hadn't even told Mahir there was a fine.
'Are we just going to pretend like we just didn't undress each other and had sex," he said to her as he looks at her intently.
She could swear her jaw dropped to the floor as her eyes gaped in shock. 'What—" the words wither as she looks at him in disbelief.
'What? I didn't lie—we did it. Didn't we?" He spoke nonchalantly as if he didn't just make her dumbstruck.
'Can I make a confession?" He asked, his eyes staring into hers. She nods carefully, not fairly sure what to expect. She was afraid of what he might say next. Mahir was full of surprises.
'I loved it—everything that happened. From our first touch to our first kiss and first night we shared—I will never take back anything that happened between us because I wanted it to and I would do anything to have that kind of moment with you again."
She froze in her spot, staring at him. She didn't know exactly how to react to what he had just confessed to her. He told her he loved everything—including making love. He told her he wanted more. Way that the real Mahir she knew and despised sitting right in front of her? The man who'd rather lose a leg that to lower his ego? The man who was overconfident and domineering?
He stares into her eyes—the confusion and astonishment were there. He could see it in her eyes and all over her face.
He inched closer, and she felt his hand encircle hers. And when she least expected, his lips connected with hers. He brought his hand up to cup her cheek, his thumb running along the curve of her cheekbone. She nestled into his hand, feeling his warmth seep into hers. His breath was hot as his kisses trailed down her neck. His hands held her back as she arched, lets out a little moan.
'Mahir…" she calls out hazily. She didn't want him to stop. Moreover, she needed more than just a kiss. But she had something to say. Something she knew it'll make him stop.
'What happens after the contract expires?" She asked and he instantly paused.