♥ Chapter 31 ♥

Yara Voss.

I still can't believe this is happening. When Mr. Damien dropped me off at his room last night, I followed his instructions without question. I took a hot shower to try to relax, but my thoughts kept spinning. I took one of his shirts that looked more like a dress on me, and even some underwear enclosed in plastic. Furthermore, I dressed in my comfortable clothes and tried to sleep, but sleep was not easy. I woke up several times during the night, always feeling like I was being watched, or worse, chased.

At five in the morning, I was already awake, after an endless sequence of nightmares. In one of them, Ronan found me and hit me, like so many other times he had endured in silence. In another, even worse, he would discover that Mr. Magnus had kissed me, and the anger in his eyes would freeze me. In the dream, he attacked me in every possible way, breaking me inside and out. I woke up with my body shaking, sweat running down my forehead, and it took me a few minutes to remember where I was and that, at least for now, I was safe.

When Mr. Kael knocked on the door and I answered, saying that the divorce papers were already prepared, I felt such relief that I almost collapsed. My hands shook as he spoke, but the steady, controlled tone of his voice gave me a strange sense of security. He said that once he signed the papers, we would be one step closer to getting rid of Ronan once and for all. And when I finally signed those documents, I felt as if invisible chains around me had been broken. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I could breathe again.

But there's still a part of me that doesn't fully believe it. I still feel like Ronan will suddenly show up, find out everything, and make me pay. I know that Mr. Kael assured that the protective order would be issued immediately and that Mr. Lorenzo was taking care of all the paperwork, but fear doesn't disappear that easily. Still, I know I took a big step today. A step towards freedom.

I look at the clock on the wall and see the minutes passing slowly. Mr. Lorenzo left some time ago, and now I can only wait. I hope he gets Ronan's signature without any complications, that everything goes according to plan. I need to believe that I'm safe, that I'm surrounded by people who care about me, who want the best for me. But it's difficult. I spent so long living in fear, being submissive, so I wouldn't get beaten even more. It's difficult to change these habits.

I wonder if I can, in fact, stop fearing. Can I trust anyone again? More than that, can I trust myself to let my guard down and allow myself to feel what I've been feeling for my bosses? It's weird to call them that now. Mr. Kael, Mr. Magnus, Mr. Damien… They have been more than bosses to me. They always treated me with a respect and kindness that I never knew, something I never had from Ronan. And also, I know they want me, just as I want them. I feel this desire in the looks they give me, in the way they subtly touch me, as if there were electricity between us.

I know I shouldn't have feelings for them, that it's inappropriate, but how can I avoid it? When they look at me with those intense looks, as if they were reading my soul, I feel my heart speed up. And when they flirt with me, with words spoken in low tones, I can't help the heat that spreads through my body. How can I pretend I don't feel anything when the mere sound of their voices makes my stomach churn with anxiety and desire?

I remember every time Mr. Magnus looked at me, that look that seemed to know all my secrets. Or Mr. Damien, whose touch on my arm gives me goosebumps. And Mr. Kael… Well, he's different. His presence is a mix of authority and protection, a combination that makes me want to give myself to him in every way possible.

10:30 ''Darkmore brothers' mansion. ''Eldoria.

Right now, I'm in my room. When I returned to that prison yesterday, I didn't take any clothes, in fact, I didn't take any clothes at all. I left everything here at the mansion, I even wanted to get more clothes, but I didn't know that everything was going to change that night. After signing the divorce, I told Mr. Kael that I would come to my room. He just nodded and kissed my forehead, and that made my heart race.

I can't help my body's reaction when they're around. All it takes is a touch or a look to leave me all confused. It's as if they have a power over me, an ability to completely disarm me. And I admit, I'm pretty nervous. Today is Saturday and all employees have been dismissed. That means I'm alone in the mansion with them. With Mr. Kael, Mr. Magnus and Mr. Damien. This idea makes my heart beat even faster. I know it's my day off, but I'm not sure what to do. 

I let out a sigh, trying to ease the tension building in my shoulders. Furthermore, I'm wearing a casual dress, something simple, which in reality, is just what I have. Something simple, nothing luxurious. I decide to go to the kitchen. I haven't eaten anything since yesterday, and my stomach is already starting to complain. 

I walk down the hall toward the kitchen, my footsteps echoing across the marble floor. The mansion is silent, and the absence of any movement is almost disturbing. I keep trying to guess where they are. Is everyone in their offices, working as usual? Or are they discussing something important? Something about the divorce or about me?

I go into the kitchen and start rummaging through the cupboards, looking for something I can prepare quickly. I end up finding some ingredients for a sandwich. Simple and fast, perfect for what I need now. I start preparing lunch.

I sit at the table with my sandwich and take a bite. The simple, familiar flavor of bread with ham and cheese brings a little comfort.