32__A pair of corpse thieves

Kamilla looked down at the black body suit that covered her body and slowly glanced up at Viktor as he tugged on black leather gloves.
“Viktor?” she called sweetly.
Viktor smiled just as sweetly, knowing he was about give her the shock of her life. “Yes, Kamilla?”

“Why are we dressed like bank robbers?”

Viktor looked at her like she was retarded. “Why else? We’re going to steal the body from the lab.”

Kamilla frowned for a second then threw her head back and laughed. “Oh, you’ve got jokes now,” she said chuckling. Kamilla’s laughter died away. “No, but seriously. Why’re we dressed like this?”
Viktor only silently looked at her as he laced up his black boots.
Kamilla’s jaw dropped open. “Oh, my God! You’re serious?! Are you insane?”

Viktor rolled his eyes and waved a hand in the air. “It’s only rational that I do it myself to avoid loose ends.”

“What? Rational…?” Kamilla held a hand to her chest as she drew air into her lungs. He was crazy. She was betrothed to a madman!
She looked at him as he nonchalantly threw a bunch of gadgets into a leather backpack. “Why didn’t you just buy it like you were going to?”

“I did buy it. Obviously the Forensics department doesn’t make legitimate trade of human cadavers. Larry and I are old friends.”

Kamilla gasped loudly. “What are you, a gang member? You’re really insane!” She crossed her arms. “I refuse to go along with your criminal activities, Viktor. Call me when you’re behind bars, I’ll pay your bail.”
With that, she turned to strut off to change, but Viktor caught her by the elbow.
“Now, now, Kamilla, let’s not be dramatic,” he said as he swiftly put the backpack onto her back.

Kamilla struggled out of his arms and glared at the bag on her back. She glared at him as he went about getting his stuff. “I said I’m not doing it! So get your bag of diabolical devices off my back this instant!”
Viktor grabbed her hand and started heading for the door of the suite. “Come on, it’ll be fun—”

Kamilla snatched her hand away and darted back into the suite. “Over my dead body!” she yelled, scrambling across the bed to hide on the other side.

Viktor put his hands on his hips and regarded her with narrowed eyes. “We’re just stealing one little human body! What’s your problem?”
Kamilla huffed and point at her head. “Are you off your head?!”

“If we don’t take that body, I’m going to have to go through very long processes just to make the case go away. I shouldn’t be dealing with the bullshit when Rogan did this! Now come on!”

Kamilla grabbed a pillow and launched it at him, but Viktor easily caught it, throwing it to one side before diving across the bed to catch her.
Kamilla squealed as his arms wrapped around her. “I’m not going! I’m not going!”
****************
“Don’t put your torch on until I say so,” Viktor murmured.

Kamilla glared at the back of his head as they crept through the dark hallway. Oh, she couldn’t *believe* this! First he got her kidnapped, now he was turning her into a kidnapper!! And a kidnapper of dead bodies, no less!
“This is insane!” Kamilla hissed as she followed Viktor.

He stopped at a door and silently tugged it open, peaking inside. “If this is insane…” he said quietly. “… then the situation is perfectly suited to you and I…” Reaching into his bag, he pulled out a little torch and flashed it down the stairs beyond the door. “Because as far as I’ve seen, neither one of us is perfectly normal.”

Kamilla scowled at him as they started down the stairs. “I’ll kill you if we go to jail!”
Viktor held up a hand when they appeared in the basement laboratory. “Shh.”

Kamilla glanced furtively behind her as she inched closer to him.
Together they walked quietly through the dark lab. Kamilla kept her eyes on Viktor’s back. If she looked into one of those dark corners, she knew she’d probably imagine a headless horseman or some other horror. At least she was familiar with the Vampire she was currently walking with, she had no intention of making any more friends of fright.

“There!” said Viktor suddenly.

Kamilla jumped and held a hand to her heart. “Geez, give me a warning before you give me a heart attack!”
Viktor walked over to an ice slate in the corner, shining his light over the white sheet. Good. Larry had left it out of the freezer for him.
In one swift move, he swept the sheet aside and Kamilla gasped.

“Sweet mama’s pie!” she exclaimed. Viktor turned to give her a look for her bizarre exclamation. Kamilla pointed at the corpse. “She’s literally the colour of white paper!”
Viktor nodded as he checked the neck, confirming that it was indeed the body he was looking for. “Yes, well, it would be rather bizarre for a body without an ounce of blood in it to be cherry pink in colour.”

Kamilla studied the woman’s face. Rather middle aged, not beautiful in particular, but with a very kind face. She pouted. “Rogan’s a jerk.”
Viktor nodded as he slipped the black body bag over the feet and pulled it up over the body, sealing the top. “Agreed. Now let’s get out of here.”

She stood back as Viktor easily lifted the body onto his shoulder and turned to head out.
“Hey, carry her carefully!” Kamilla scolded.
Viktor turned to her. “She’s already dead, Kamilla.”
“She used to be a living person, okay!”
“You carry her then if you care so much!” Viktor scream-whispered and Kamilla was shocked when the corpse suddenly came her way.

Before she could react, the frozen corpse was lying in her arms. Kamilla stared down at it with wide eyes as her whole body went stiff.

“Viktor! Get it off me *right* now! I swear, I’ll kill you if you don’t!”

Viktor stood back, unfazed by Kamilla’s panic. He studied her with the corpse in her arms. “Impressive. Your strength has become far greater than an average woman’s.”
“I’ll prove that by shoving my boot so far up your ass if you don’t get this thing off me right now! Viktor!”

Viktor put his hands on his hips and grinned. “Oh? Now it’s a thing? I thought she used to be a lovely little living human who we should exercise extra care with.”

Kamilla turned her face up and squeezed her eyes shut. “Viktoooorr! Stop it! Please take it! Oh, my God!”

The sound of his laughter filled the basement and Kamilla glared at him, further infuriated by how bloody handsome his smile made him.
“I…” she said in a strong but shaky tone. “...*swear* …that I will shave your eyebrows off while you sleep! Let’s see how attractive you’ll be with no eyebrows!”
Viktor was about to dare her to try that, but stopped when his ears picked it up.

Slowly he turned his head to the side. He tensed, listening to the approaching sound.
“Fuck. Larry said he’d clear the fucking building!”

Kamilla started looking around frantically. “What? What?! Is someone there? Oh, my God, we’re going to jail!”

In one swift move, Viktor pulled the body out of Kamilla’s arms and onto his shoulder, grabbing her hand with his free one.
Silently, they ran up the basement stairs until they came to the door. Kamilla bit her lip, grabbing the cold handle and pulling the heavy door open.
She stood back as Viktor started manoeuvring the body through the doorway, but suddenly a bright light flashed on and focused right on the both of them.

Kamilla and Viktor both froze.

“Dear. *God!*” exclaimed the terrified security guard. “Corpse thieves! It’s a pair of corpse thieves!!!"