Guilt

It's no new thing that influential people are corrupt. Worse still if they are in a great position of power. And their children are the most horrible. They trample on the less powerful. The people know it's quite unfortunate to be the lesser werewolf. Everyone in Asark knows that people in power are evil. It's just that they have no other option than to accept such fortune they have been cursed with.

Sassaba knows Leowulf's behaviors first hand. She's also heard about it from others. Some people did praise him. This she opened her ears, heart, and mind to. And others never spoke well about him even if he does the most chivalrous act.

"He is proud," her best friend said of him.

"He isn't. You just don't understand him," she defended him.

"What's there to understand about him? They are all the same. These royals. Those people who were opportune to have great positions," Sassaba's friend spoke out of despise for every royals.

"It's not like you know them all. Leowulf is different. He is not proud. You know what he does at the new town?" She asked.

"Yes! A facade called charity,"

"It's not your fault. You must have been unfortunate in your experiences with them," Sassaba commented.

Now that she remembers that conversation and seeing what Leowulf is doing, it's something entirely.

She had always loved him right from when they were little. In the academy, they were best friends. When they left by age twenty, they still kept in contact. Only as friends and nothing more. But over time, they got closer and closer. At times, Sassaba can't what led to the first sex between both of them. It must have been on one of the days she still goes to visit him. They would be together in a room. Talk and gist. Something that would have been forbidden for a normal male in Asark.

No two people of the opposite sex were supposed to be in such a private room. It had been brought up once. The ultimate Alpha already said that the protection of the goddess is with his son. And his sense of duty wouldn't allow him to commit such a crime. But definitely, the man-made one of the biggest mistakes of his life that day.

Their friendship came to a halt for a long time the moment Leowulf was supposed to begin his training and education on being the Alpha werewolf. A moment of loneliness for her. For a long while, while he was still in training, she feared that by the time Beowulf comes out, he will be an entirely new person. And he won't love her anymore.

"I expected you to stop loving me," she said to him the first afternoon after sex they had at this same Pinchore Sycamore.

"Why would I do that?" Leowulf wondered. His face didn't show enough concern like she wanted him to. He looked up in the sky while replying to her.

"And what will be of us now?"

"I love you. And that's all you should know," he said. But she preferred him to look into her eyes. She understands the post-ejaculation feeling but she needed him to still show her affection. She wanted him to stand by his side and look into her eyes. She wanted him to look at her lips and dig his hands into her scalps. Then he should take his eyes down to her neck. Then back up to her lips. Despite the sex they just had, she wanted him to lock his lips with hers. Then they could chat away but Leowulf was just looking into the skies. Not showing much interest in her.

That's how it has always been for a very long time. That's how it's supposed to be today. But they haven't had sex and probably won't. A servant who seems to know him saw them. He caught them and even for the sake of her sex, if not for his life, he could have kept quiet. But he was too amazed or foolish that he screamed.

Sassaba felt Leowulf fazed for a second. She wasn't looking at him when the servant caught them. She had his face in his genitals and she was trying to let his glans touch her throat just like Leowulf had always begged her. It hurt at first due to her gag reflex. But she had tried lots of desensitization just for him to feel good. But this servant has just interrupted them.

"Leowulf!" She screamed when she saw the first reaction Leowulf gave. He jumped towards the servant. He waved a punch.

"Stay back and low, Sassaba," Leowulf replied just as the servant blocked his punch, even though the servant still had some injuries. Now they were in a lock. A lock Leowulf created just so she could dress up.

All of a sudden, she saw him turn around, go behind the servant. The servant tried turning.

"Lord Leowulf, I am not…" Leowulf didn't wait for him to finish his statement. He punched the servant one more time. He followed up with other consecutive punches. He ran after the servant who was groaning and trying to escape.

"Leowulf! Stop, please. We could settle this," Sassaba cried. She's already dressed. She could have interfered in the fight, but she knows better the difference in their strength. Meddling might only hurt her. Everything her best friend had said about royal ones came rushing to her memory and she confirmed it.

Leowulf didn't stop at punching the servant. He kicked him. At the moment Sassaba thought everything had ended, Leowulf picked up the weakened servant. The servant looks near dead. His bones weren't healing. Leowulf pierced his switched claws deep into the servant's neck. He dug out his gullet. And crushed his neck bones. He tore the gullet apart.

She couldn't believe her sight. Her Leowulf. A killer? Her Leowulf had just torn apart the core of a living werewolf right before her, without regard for how that would be on her. He killed a werewolf just to cover up his crimes? The blood. The sight of them makes her want to scream. They seem to have frozen the air around her. And breathing in the air, froze her lungs. The sting in her throat avoided her from screaming or speaking.

The picture repainted itself before her. She saw herself looking down on the servant. And she saw herself stab the servant and tear out his gullet. The core of a werewolf. Every part of a werewolf can be disconnected and it will heal. But once everything that shares information and receives information from the brain gets severed, that's the end of such werewolves. And she just saw herself doing it. The picture hurt her eyes. It created a heavy fear in her chest. She went down, gasping for air. The more she inhaled, the drier her tongue became.

"Sassaba, let's leave here now," Leowulf screamed at her. She heard him. But she couldn't process the information.

"Sassaba, come here. No one should see us here," Leowulf hurried her but she didn't stand up. She heard some other murmurings from Leowulf. But she wasn't concerned. For the death of this servant, her guilt bar rose. Her present feels like hell. She wanted to ease herself of the current pain she is in. This hollow feeling of guilt. She could hear all the cries of men and women who had been punished because of premarital sex. There were screams in her head.

She couldn't act nor move but she knew what was happening around her. Leowulf called her once more. She didn't respond. She noticed him move behind her. She didn't want him to hold her or hug her. She didn't want him to look into her eyes. In fact, she hates that he is looking at her. Coupled with guilt that is crippling her, an inconsiderable amount of fear envelops her too. The man she thought would make her safe. She understood that Asark is a world run by violence. And this is her first time being exposed to violence. It's expected to take a turn on her.

"I love you, Sassaba. I have always loved you. And I am sorry for everything I might have done to hurt you and things I will do. I hope you can forgive me when you transcend," he whispered in her ears. He kissed her earlobes. She would have loved it earlier on, but not now.

Her brain has received his wordings but no strength to put words out.

"Leowulf," that's the only thing she heard herself say. Then, she felt a light cold, and a rapid beat in her head. Sharply followed is a stinging pain. And a larger flow of cold and stiffness that spread through every part of her. Then, a calmness. And she lost consciousness.