Doubted

Leowulf can't forgive himself for what he has done. He deserves every single act of aggression that comes from anyone he knows. But his father had decided to keep it between himself and his brother. Leowulf is concerned about how his father came to know about what happened. After his father asked everyone to leave, he expected his father to ask him questions. Ask him real questions like what is true or did it happen. Even if his father hadn't asked him that question, maybe just something else. He even thought this father was about to punish him for going to Mara's house.

Ever since he became the Ultimate Alpha, he had been warned never to walk or associate around women alone. Jealousy at times bred rumour. And rumours could be used to taint your image at times. That's what a young priest had told him. This same young priest had told him to be careful of how he relates with women. They are innocent and can be so tempting. He was supposed to stay off of them.

But before every one of these people could tell him to stay away from women, he had something to do with Sassaba. As unlawful as the act is for a normal wolf, he had committed it. Not to talk of when he became an Ultimate Alpha to be.

Leowulf heard a knock on his door. He didn't respond. The knocks came again a bit more fierce than it was. He kept lying on his bed and looking at his ceiling. Now is the time he doesn't want to see anyone. He heard the knock for the third time. He felt frustrated. He wanted to ask who it was, but the anger in him could make him ask rudely. He kept looking at his ceiling and thinking of possible ways to make everyone forget what had happened. Or at least to make them stop suspecting him.

"Damn it," he heard Audolf's voice from behind the door. Immediately, he heard a heavy punch on the door that brought it down. He stood up and jumped away from his bed. Audolf came in calmly.

"What is it?" Leowulf asked.

"I am here to talk to you," Audolf answered him. As polite as he used to.

"After the kicks you gave uhn?" Leowulf complained.

"That's not what it is. You messed up. You messed up in two ways,"

"I know. I messed up in ways that I can't even imagine," Leowulf said. He sat on his bed away from Audolf.

"First, you broke the law. You could have just eased yourself. Satisfy yourself,"

"I couldn't. It seems idiotic to me," Leowulf said. Audolf blinked his eyes and shook his head continuously.

"Don't you think while I was young too, I didn't want to have sex? But I know what it was. I avoided it by helping myself whenever I am alone," Leowulf didn't reply.

"Also, what impression do you think will have on Mara?" Leowulf gasped. He hasn't even seen her today. It's been more than seven hours since the whole world woke up but he hasn't gone to greet the woman he is supposed to be married to.

"I didn't expect it to turn out this way. And I am sorry,"

"I came here to let you know that the bride price is being negotiated. And soon, we will be arranging how the marriage will go,"

"Oh! Do you think she will be mad at me?"

"She will be a fool if she isn't. Her brother was even there,"

"I knew it, I saw someone from her pack. So it's her brother," Leowulf said.

"Come on! You will sleep in my room tonight. But before then, you should go and see her," Audolf told him. Audolf picked up the fallen door and placed it by the side.

"About the kicks, I had to do it because of your father. Else, he could have hurt you in worse ways. I love you, son," Audolf said and left.

He didn't see Leowulf's smile. And how the smile turned to a guilt-filled face.


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Skoll left the Ultimate Alpha's courtroom half an hour ago. It's interesting how the man was able to successfully get on his nerves every single time. He could have attacked the frail man. But his father had warned him never to let anger get the better side of him, to the extent where he even slaps a mere maid in the Ultimate Alpha's palace.

"Ah! Horgan is rather foolish isn't he?" The Ultimate Alpha had commented about his father, immediately he mentioned what his father had requested. Skoll can only show his contempt at a facial value. He must not hurl abusive words nor try to be violent physically.

"Did he really tell you to ask me that?"

"Yes!"

"So he doesn't want my son to marry his son. You know, I actually thought this marriage might allow both of us to come to an agreement and come back being peaceful," the ultimate Alpha said, and this made Skoll grow more interested in knowing who Rudina was. He had asked his father, but his father told him the only important thing was for him to get his mission done.

"Tell him I accept," The Ultimate Alpha said.

"After all, it's worth she is worth to me that matters, not what she is worth to him. It doesn't really matter. Ah! Your father can't be funny," the ultimate Alpha smiled.

Skoll left after lots of banter from the Ultimate Alpha. He already has his reason for being there accomplished. Whatever else, isn't needed.

And in the room he was assigned to, he thought of things he can do that would make up for the boredom the Ultimate pack gives him. He could go to Sassaba's mother's room, to create a bit of familiarity between them, but he advised against it.

Maybe tomorrow or whenever before he leaves but not now.


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"Now this is the room you will be in for the main time. Once you and my son get engaged, you will be in a better room," the Ultimate Luna said. She smiled at Mara. Mara returned her smile even though she isn't happy.

She is concerned if she really wants to be with Leowulf. What if her brother had been right, and Leowulf is just a random guy who isn't all pious as her first impression of him had been. She has been praying that some sort of enlightenment or clearance comes to her. So she should know. Left to her current feelings, she wanted to be with him. Her life since her grandmother died, has been full of sorrow and being controlled. Her father had contributed largely to that. Aaron came along the way. Even if he had been with her for four months. She thanked the goddess that both of them hadn't experienced the full moon together, else things would get worse. It might have been impossible to get him off her, even if she loves Leowulf. But within the last few days that she had met Leowulf, there had been changes in her interest. Her life feels more comfortable. She smiled more. And here came her brother.

She felt like her parents and family are mostly the cause of her misfortune. Just the day he came, another bout of misfortune occurred to her. His presence put doubt to her love for this man who seems to be her savior.

"Blessings of the goddess be with you mother," Leowulf said right behind his mother. She heard his voice. And she knows it's him. She inhaled him. And she confirmed it. Her heart skipped a beat.

"Ah! Blessings son. Have you come to see her?" The ultimate Alpha asked and excused herself. She left with Elvis. Ever since she knew that Edon is a family member. He is a brother to the Ultimate Alpha, she wondered why he is always with the Ultimate Luna.

"Why is he always with her?" She asked Leowulf pointing at Edon.

"Well, he is a Doctor,"

"That's more than how a doctor and a patient would relate," she said. She sat on her bed.

"Oh well, it's a tradition in our pack that every child has a godfather or a godmother who would take care of the child alongside the parent," Leowulf explained.

"Wow! Was he yours?"

"No! He is weak. I am not your regular wolf when it comes to strength. So Audolf has always been my godfather," Leowulf smiled. He picked a seat close to her bed. He looked at her and looked at the chair. She was no longer staring at him.

To Mara, the moment he carried the chair and placed it before her, the feeling of doubt came in. She had heartily smiled at his comments. But then her brother's words about her not being special to him came to her memory. She frowned but tried not to show it.

"May I sit?" He asked her.

"Yes," she smiled. She adjusted her position on her bed.

"I came to see you," he said pouting his lips. He gave a light smile.

"It must not be heard of that the Ultimate Alpha to be acts like a child," she said, giving him a broad smile

"Exactly, so must it not be heard that the Ultimate Luna to be doesn't trust the Ultimate Alpha," Beowulf said.

She gave him a surprised look. He tilted his head to the left a bit and nodded.

"Well, that's not how I planned on starting the conversation, but I guess it can't be helped,"

"Why do you think I don't trust you? I trust you," she said.

"I know you do. Even my mom does, but she was doubtful of me today because of the drama that happened this morning,"

"A mother's mourning is not a drama," she snapped silently. She wanted to correct him but not harshly.

"I am not saying it's a drama, but you know, it was sad to watch," he corrected himself.

"I didn't see what happened but I heard them,"

"You must have heard the part where I was accused of knowing what happened to the girl," he said.

"Do you know about it?"

"No! I don't. But I did meet her yesterday. She is an old friend. A very old friend from the academy,"

"An old friend from the academy?" She asked.

"Yes! You must have one of such friends right?"

"I don't. I didn't go to the academy. My grandma didn't allow it,"

"Oh! Grandma's baby," Leowulf said. Mara loved the way both of them smiled. It felt relaxing that Leowulf was with her. She feels calm and relaxed that Leowulf felt the need to explain himself.

"You know, I was doubtful," she said. Leowulf smiled.

"I knew it,"

"I thought I wasn't special. I felt like that's how you treat every felan in Asark," he said and took a deep breath. She felt a calm shiver run through her spine.

"God, why do I say things I swear not to say whenever I am with you,"

"Maybe it's because you love me that you can barely hide anything from me," Leowulf said. She smiled.

"But there was nothing between me and her. And I didn't know about what killed her,"

"What was her name?" Mara asked.

"Sassaba,"

"Sassaba. A maiden name. May the goddess allow her rest in her bosom,"

"Amen,"

"It hurts that she is dead but there isn't much I can do. Not even now that half of the world is doubting me," Leowulf explained himself.

Mara knew this was what she always wanted. Her brother is wrong. He is the one sowing seeds in her. This is the perfect life she had dreamt of. The next thing she needs is the time Leowulf will be able to say things to her ears while holding her. She swore she would never listen to her brother.

Somewhere in a book, she had read on the importance of communication in a relationship. Either a growing one or an established one. And this is evidence of that.

Whatever doubt she must have been having earlier on, has been cleared to a very large extent. What's next is the fear of her family. What would they say about her being married to their worst enemy? Her father would definitely object. Her mother who was supposed to speak to her father hasn't. And she doesn't even understand why Skoll is here with her. And for Fenris, he has no issue dealing with whatever is happening in the Pack. So she isn't his concern.

She looked at Leowulf one time. Lost in her thought rather than what he was saying, she prayed to the goddess to give her this one chance. Just this once chance to marry Leowulf and she worship the goddess forever.