Calming her nerves

*Zac*
Standing at the window in the small dining room, I down my second glass of wine while I await Callie's arrival. Obviously, me and Draco have a differing opinion regarding the meaning of the term neglected. For my wife's sake, I am grateful. For the sake of my pride, however, I would have liked to have seen some evidence that something required my attention.

I shouldn’t allow my brother’s machinations to put me in a foul mood. Not when I will once again know what it was like to lie completely and absolutely with Callie, to be surrounded by her heat, to match the rhythm of my body to hers.

I can’t recall ever having anticipated the bedding of a woman so much. If we weren’t sharing the car with the nursemaid and Zane, I suspect Callie's marriage bed would have been the seat upon which she was sitting. It has been the longest journey I have ever taken in such a short span of time. Or at least the longest I recall.

I pour more wine and drink it as though it can wash away all my doubts. The past makes a man, and I am missing two years of mine. I have to let it go. I am not going to regain it. I have a wife, a son, and responsibilities. I have done the right thing by Callie. Marrying her. I will tend my brother’s estate that needs no tending, while I determine how to best provide for my family in my own way.

I turn at the soft footfalls. She appears nervous, her hands clasped in front of her. It bothers me immensely that she seems so uncomfortable with what is to come, as though she has never truly experienced it. Had I been so in need of release that I took her swiftly, without thought to her pleasure? It has never been my way before. Surely, when it comes to women, I have not changed so very much while at war.

I am certain other aspects of my character may have shifted, hopefully for the better. But where women are concerned, as arrogant as it is, I know I have little room for improvement.

Because I know it will please her, I ask, “Did Zane get settled in all right?"

She smiles. Mentioning our son always has the ability to bring a smile to her face, to put her at ease. “Based upon how rapidly his greedy little mouth worked, I would say yes."

“Good. Shall we?” I indicate the cloth-covered round table, where candles flicker and our food awaits our appetite.

Blushing, she nods and walks over to a chair. I pull it out for her. Once she is seated, I bend and press a kiss to her nape. “Relax, Callie. It’s not as though we have not done this before.”

“But it was so long ago." She mumbles.

“And apparently, I was not at my best. If I didn't make it pleasantly memorable for you, then I owe you an apology. I assure you that won't be the case tonight.” I hear her sharp intake of breath, watch as her blood rises to the surface, a blush that spreads far beyond her face. Taking my chair, I try to read the answer in her eyes. Is it less than she expected?

Reaching over, I pour wine into her glass. “I instructed the servants to leave us in peace. It seems I've hardly had a moment with my own thoughts during the past week."

“If you wish solitude, I could leave.” She says, her eyes darting to the door.

“On the contrary, being alone with you is all I want.” I tap my glass to hers. “To my wife. May you never regret being forced into this arrangement.”

The glass trembles as she carries it to her lips. “I would never regret it. I hope the same can be said of you."

If I had had no obligations, if I could chose freely, I would have never married. A bachelor is forgiven indiscretions much more easily. I was even expected to have them. But a husband as such, I will have to curtail my sinful exploits. It is a dilemma I will consider when faced with it.

For tonight, I can truly say there is no other woman I wish to be with more.