Chapter Fourteen

He opens the carriage door. I want to protest, but he's looking straight through me. His heart singing to mine. The carriage steps clatter as I enter with a bent head. The windows are tinted black and rumor has it they're magic proof.
He jerks his chin and says, "I didn't know you have one of those."
I follow his eyes. "Oh." I chuckle. "A sibling?"
He nods.
"Kaseke is a twin," I say to D'ziko.
His head jerks back to me and if I didn't know any better I'd think he just swore under his breath. His eyes have lost their usual sparkle. "Yer brother is scary enough, now you're telling me I have to do with two?"
"Commodore died."
He freezes. I study his face, trying to read it. His eyes seem to narrow infinitesimally
"What?" He looks at me, confused, angry. "Cobra was your brother?"
"You knew him?"
D'ziko sits up straighter and turns to face me.
"Are you kidding me?" He smiles but his eyes appear to be miles away, as if my question has transported him to another place in time. "Man! Cobra was so... that guy could go on hours without saying a word and the silence never got uncomfortable."
"I don't understand."
"I don't know how it started really." He glances down at me from the corner of his eye, and smiles. It doesn't reach his eyes. "But all I remember is Cobra and I sitting at the lake down by Mandela Drive. We'd say Hi and that was it for conversation. It was enough for us. For him. It was strange and yet I felt as though I could call him a good friend."
I laugh. "Commodore had the empathy sword. He could manipulate emotions."
Then his smiles disappears. "Then one day, it just, it wasn't the same. He told me he'd found his lifemate and that he was gay."
"Don't tell me Commodore rejected his mate?"
"He felt he had no choice," he says, staring out through the choatic wave of people, lost in thought. "The prejudice. The stares. The hatred. They'd offer his neck to Leza. He tried to stay away from Mondo but it proved to be impossible with each day that passed."
"Commodore's an idiot," I say, fuming.
D'ziko raises his eyebrows.
I scowl into space. "Wouldn't it have been better if people sacrificed him to the Gods rather than commit suicide and mess with fate, anger the Gods?"
D'ziko's breaths become labored and his fists ball. He glares at me for a long minute.
"Cobra would never kill himself." He is confident.
"He did." I pause for a second. "... by pumping his veins with merryz."
"No. no. no." He's still looking ahead, eyes expressionless. "Cobra loved Mondo too much. He wouldn't have left him for anything. Not permanently."
I sandwich his face, and force his gaze on mine, still struggle to think straight. "Are you saying my brother was -- was murdered?"
"That's exactly what I'm saying, but I can't prove it."
"No. It can't be." I shake my head, refusing to believe. "Commodore had no enermies."
D'ziko gently removes my iron grip from his face and places my hands on his thighs. He traces the bulging veins. His touch is soft, delicate.
"Except," he says. "Cobra saw the person that robbed him off his magic." He shakes his head, sadly. "I tried to stop him but yer brother was determined to confront him and I never saw him again after that."
I take a deep breath and stare through the window at the crowds outside watching our carriage. Talking about him is clotting my heart. It feels as though someone is constantly stabbing me and twisting, deeper, harder every time. The pain makes me want to double over and cry.
"Wait, I just --" my voice is coming out about an octave higher "--it doesn't make sense. If my brother was really yer friend then how come you didn't know he had siblings, a family."
His eyes slide back to mine, still tight. "I knew he had a sister, Black and a younger brother, Froggie."
I can't help the sting in my eyes. Commodore and Kaseke called me Blacksteel when we were growing up because according to them my skin is too black and I was strong like steel. While Kaseke calls me Steel, Commodore called me Black and from that nickname came Brownie, I think people of Noddon thought Blackie was too rude.
He sees Queen Mother and my father approaching and narrows his eyes. “That's all we have time for.”
My heart drops to my stomach. “I thought ya were driving.”
“Don't look so disappointed.” He hesitates. “I... if it's any consolation, I hate being away from ya too.”
I look away from him.
“You don’t want me to go do you?” he asks.
I nod.
He looks into my eyes. “I have to. I always come back to you, you know that,” he says.
He’s right, he aways does. He merely drops from the carriage, nods curtly to my father and sprints for the woods.
“Who was that?” Papa asks the second they're settled opposite me. My father has clear skin. He is light skinned with thin lips and soft curly hair.
“Some street kid asking for change.”
Papa eyes me suspiciously but doesn't broach the subject.
Queen Mother keeps picking invincible strands of hair from her silk dress. Papa pretends to be reading the school pamphlet he came in with. And I gladly stare out the window.
"We should go dragon hunting," Papa says.
It is quiet. It takes me a few awkward seconds for me to realize that he's actually talking to me.
"That's okay. Kaseke already said he'll go with me."
He shrugs, and whispers something to his wife. The Queen blushes and looks at her hands fidgeting.
"How about we all go, me, the Queen and you kids both. As a family?"
"You forgot to mention the most important member of the family?"
Papa looks confused. Since he left home before I was even bone, he seems to have forgotten he once had a wife. I wonder where he thinks "the kids" came from.
"You want to bring the other twin with?"
"He died," I remind him. "His name was Commodore."
He ribs the back of his neck. "Oh. I forgot."
There's an awkward pause.
"How's Rowena, Imani?" the Queen enquires.
"Mama's fine."
She nods and tries to smile at me. Her lips settle into a sneer. "Good. I guess."
"Who's this important person?" Papa squints at this feet. "Is it that lad I found you with?"
"Okay," I say loudly. "I know what you're trying to do. It's not working. We hadn't had a conversation ever since I was born. Not unless you want steels for your family. And can you just stop pretending like mama doesn't exist, Leza!"
And that concludes my first 'serious' conversation with my father.
I look out the carriage window wondering how the coachman can see when it's so dark.
We gallop through the night. Out the window, the edge of the road is lined with almond-trees.
Suddenly there's a sound of something banging against the window. I open it. It's a hawk and comes straight to me. I already know who sent it.
A writing pad and pen suddenly appear in front of me. I stare at the board as words begin to appear as D'ziko thinks them.
“Ya have the most gorgeous smile, I wish ya'd do it more often. I hope ya're smiling now,” it reads.
I am. Why am I impressed by all this?
“Should I bring ya a new set of eye contacts?” he asks.
“I don’t think ya’re the type that asks for permission to do anything, but no, I'll be in and out of the royal palace, so no need. And by the way, it wasn't a smile. It was a grimace,” I think, before a none-negtiable goodbye.
I miss him the moment I wave the hawk away. I can’t let him know that.
We descend a steep incline into the royal grounds up to the double doors.
They require an army to push them aside. Twelve muscled men. Six at each side.
Two Royal savants open the carriage and one offers me their hand. I look at it for so long. What an odd man. Who still shakes hands?
"Spha...?" Queen mother asks, annoyed. She flicks her tongue and makes a soft nca-nca sound. "This is the Goddess. Are yer hands clean?" Then she smiles at me. Apologetic. "I'm sorry. My servants are always clean. This will never happen again. I'll get -- Jay-Jay...? Come help the Goddess out."
Oh. Oh. I didn't realize. I shake my head so hard that I'm surprised my ears don't fall off. "No. No. Spha's fine."
I definitely want Spha to escort me to the Feast table. He's got those broad shoulders ya'd likely find on a professional wrestler. His skin is deliciously dark. And those lips. Leza have mercy. The boy done gave me a virginal waterfall.
"Take my vagina, Spha."
"Goddess...?"
"Hand. I said take my hand."