To be free

Rae’s POV

Our class was very much different the the last and this time, Erik didn’t touch me otr approached me a lot. In fact, he hardly looked at me.

One could think it would be easier for me, since his presence and proximity would make me nervous, but I realized that I prefered him around me, rather than distant. I was having a very hard time concentrating.

“Are you listening to me?” He had a worried look on his face. My mind was wandering, again, thinking about the time when we went to the ice cream shop and he held me, preventing me from being hit by a car. Those eyes, so green and his muscled chest… oh, no. ‘Stop, Raelyn!’. I had to keep my mind clear. “Seems like you are not.”

“I’m sorry! I…” I tried to explain myself, but, what was I going to tell him? That I was daydreaming about him? That I wanted him to touch and to cherish me? I wanted him to… Kiss me.

“I think you must be too tired, because you are completely distant from me.” He was looking at the desk.

“I don’t want to!” I don’t know what has gotten into me! Why would I say that? Erik was now staring at me, as if trying to reach my very soul. Was it what he was trying to do? Without breaking eye contact, he rose from his seat and walked to me.

“You don’t want to be distant to me?” His face was unreadable for me. I didn’t know if he was neutral, or satisfied or worse, angry.

“I don’t.” I had to tell the truth. He told me to always be truly with him and I will do my best to do it.

He leaned over me, his hands on each side of me, supporting his weight on the chair armrest, which caused him to be very, very close to me. His face was nowinches apart from mine and I could feel my body getting warmer because of him. His scent was surrounding me, as if embracing my whole being. And he was not even touching me.

“Do you know how dangerous it is that you’re saying?” His tone was dangerous. Was he mad with me? Angry? But… he would never hurt me, right? I mean, I don’t feel like he is going to beat me. ‘But he can always send someone else to do it, like before’, the little voice in my head said.

“No.” I expected my voice to sound more firm, but it came out terribly feeble. AS if I was squeaking.

“Rae, Rae.” I heard the air passing through his teeth, as if he was holding back something. Then, I felt something very warm on my cheek and electricity going under my skin. I closed my eyes in order to feel better. I missed his touch, as greedy as it may sound. “Fuck…”

Next thing, I was being pulled out of the chair and onto the table. Of course I had to open my eyes to see what was going on. Erik was between my legs, holding my waist and I opened my mouth to ask what was happening, but I had not the chance. His lips. Was he kissing me? It was… heaven!


The electrical feeling increased, as well as the warmth . It was not only under my skin, it was inside my blood. I was going to go crazy at any second, because even though he was very close to me, it was not enough. I wanted more.

I heard a feminine voice and, to my astonishment, that was me. Moaning. How embarrassing! But Erik didn’t seem to think so, because I heard he growling and pull me even more to him. I could feel something hard on my lower parts. Probably he had something inside his pockets and that was…

“Erik?” I managed to say, only Selene knows how to.

“Hmm?”

“Take… your po-pocket.” He stopped kissing me and I could see he was confused. I decided to show him, so I descended my hand to his pants, hoping he would not think I was being too bold.

His eyes opened wide when I slightly touched the object inside his pants and I felt his grip on my wrist.

“What are you doing?” His voice was now a bit harsh. Oh… I think I really did cross the lie again.

“T-that is… in your p-pocket. I-I was p-pointing out f-for you to t-take it out.” I was stuttering. How great! Damn…

“You want me to take it out?” He raised his eyebrows to me.

“Yeah. Won’t it break if you keep p-pressing against m-me?” I was more confident. I had to give him a proper answer. He told me to tell the truth and so I was. So, I was not doing anything wrong, right?

He squinted his eyes at me, but I don’t know exactly what was going on inside his mind. I think he was analyzed to see if I was lying or not. But I wasn’t and I had to believe he had a good judgment of the situation!

“Do you know what it is?” His voice was lower, now. But not managing.

“No.” He started to… laugh? He even threw his head back. He was laughing at me. I looked down. I was a joke. What did I say wrong? His fingers touched my chin and lifted it, forcing me to look at his face again.

“I feel like a villain, you know? Try to take your virtue.” He said, still smiling.

“Why?” I asked him. “Because you kissed me?” Well, he has touched me before, when I got him with that other girl and… those memories were not good to be reminded of.

“Because, Rae, you don’t even know what is inside my pants. I cannot take it off. If I do, I’ll have to make you mine.” I didn’t know what to say. His words were not really making sense to me. He couldn’t take it off? Make me his? Wait a minute! “See? You are now all flushed by my words. I cannot treat you like the others.”

Ah, of course not. I was not an omega of his pack. I was not part of the pack, technically. I was still a rogue and obviously he had to see me as something different. My heart was having a hard time beating, because it was hurting. I couldn’t look at him anymore.

He kissed me again, but this time, he didn’t go all savage. It was tender and didn’t last too long. He hugged me, pulling my body to his chest and kissed the top of my head.

“I don’t know what to do with you.” Was what he said, next. What did he mean with that statement? Was he going to get rid of me?

“Are you kicking me out?” I don’t even know where I got the courage to ask him that.

“Kick you out?” He seemed surprised by my question and held me by my arms, pushing me back a little, making me look at his face, again. “You are not leaving this pack, Rae. Ever!”

My mind went crazy with his words. Did it mean he was… keeping me prisoner forever? I wanted to leave, just not at that moment. I wanted freedom.

“But… I want to go.”

His face became pale and if I said something really, really wrong.

“You want to… leave?”

I better explain myself right now, because he was acting very weird.

“I mean that I want to be free. Not that I want to leave right now. But to have the freedom to decide if I want to go or not to another place.”

“You want to leave me?” Ok… that was not what I said. His expression was becoming sullen by the second.

“No! I… I don’t want to leave you. But I don’t want to be a slave, either.”

He looked quite surprised at me, blinking repeatedly.

“I see. Well, the class is over.” He announced something that was quite obvious. But he didn’t move, so I couldn’t get down from the table. I looked at him, at the floor and raised my eyebrows. He would understand, right? “I’ll take you to Cassandra.”