xvii. think bigger

There are many traditions in our group that are scattered throughout the year and one of them includes skipping school on Von’s birthday because she skips school that day. It’s the very representation of “if your friends jump off a cliff are you going to do it too?” And the answer to that is yes. Yes, we will.

Von never goes to school on her birthday and she never asked us to skip with her, it kind of just… became a thing. Jodene and Gina have a harder time convincing their parents to let them each year but they manage. “It’s only a day” has always been the excuse and they make up for it by going to school every day in the school year if they can help it.

Because of this issue, Von had always held her parties the Saturday following and spend most of her actual birthday hanging out with us and planning for the weekend. We sleep at her place the night before and today, it’s Tuesday.

We’re all lounging around in PJs in the main room with GG playing on the massive flatscreen mounted on the wall when Von stops right in front of the TV. We all protest by whining and peering around her. I toss a few pieces of popcorn at her.

“There’s been a change of plans,” she says, successfully dragging our attention off our go-to show.

Von doesn’t live in a mansion exactly but her house is more on the prestigious side in a gated community and bigger than the average middle-class two-person home.

We know she has to be talking about the party, so I say, “What change?”

She shakes her head, her eyes going to the high ceiling that glinted with encrusted glowing stones in the dark. “Walk with me.”

When she steps over the thousand pillows decorating our makeshift bed for the night and heading toward the room’s exit, I spin to look at the others. They meet my gaze, shrugging and just as clueless, we all leave our comfort zones and follow.

“Does she have to be so dramatic?” Gina says, shaking her head as she watches Von ascend the brown marbled staircase.

“Yes,” Von calls over her shoulder and does the absolute most by dipping low until her knees are almost touching the stairs, the black silk of her thin robe pooling at her feet. She stands with the skirt gingerly in her perfectly manicured fingers and lifting it slightly as she tilts her head back and takes the stairs slower, more dramatic.

Gina snorts and I press my lips together to stop from laughing. When Gina reaches out and shoves Von, making her stumble, I lose it and double over laughing so hard tears are in my eyes.

Von is flashing her hair as we pile up the stairs, buzzing with amusement.

When we’re on the second floor, the hallway's dimly lit with candle-like vintage lights hanging on the walls every few feet, Von turns so she facing us, walking backward. “I’m taking this thing off,” she says, pulling at her hair, “and you know what happens and we need to plan for tomorrow and Saturday, so-”

My eyes move behind her when there’s movement a few feet back.

I swallow, biting my lip and peering around her as mister tall, dark and handsome struts toward us in black joggers and a grey tank. His brown skin glows under the pale orange lights, his shoulders broad and chest causing the tank top to stretch across his pecks.

“*Oh my..*.” I mouth to myself, watching Drew rub the sleep from his eyes and scratch at his low scruff.

Am I going to hell for fantasizing about a guy in his thirties? Maybe. Do I care? Not in the least.

He sees us coming down the hall and his expression lifts as he smiles warmly, melting my heart to nothing but red goo and nerves against my ribs.

“Kira.” Von’s low hiss snaps me out of it and I jerk my gaze back to her. I smile at her in what I hope is innocent-looking enough, but she glares at me like she can rip my eyes out.

“Oh come on,” I counter, my voice as low as hers as Drew gets closer. “The guy is *fine*.” I ignore Gina and Jodene’s low snickers and add, “I let you harass my brother.”

Von’s eyes narrow. “Your brother is eighteen.”

I almost throw my arms up. “So? Think about it. We can be each other's sis-” I stop when Drew is too close that he might hear me if I keep going.

“Girls,” he says, his voice deep and husky with sleep and a hint of his French accent. His isn’t as heavy as Von’s since he’s been here longer and probably tones it down voluntarily. But there are times when certain words bring it out and twist something deep in my gut.

I blink, eyeing him once in less than a second so he doesn’t notice if I linger too long. We address him in a unit and I grab Gina’s arm, pressing into her. She clears her throat and I know she’s doing everything in her not to bark out laughter.

Drew is a smiling ball of warmth as his gaze flits across each of us. He’s always been so bright and bubbly—the flame to my moth. Or the other way around, that works too.

“How’s the planning going? Did Yvonne tell you about the yacht?”

I’m so caught up in his smile—just his face in general—that I don’t get what he says until Jodene addresses it.

“Yacht…” she trails off, the question hanging in the air.

We look at Von who’s glaring at her brother now. “I was about to.” Her voice is sweet, light, although she looks like she wants to rip his head off. Von hates when anyone steals her spotlight and this might have been a center stage one.

Drew backs off, hands up with palms exposed and he retreats. “My bad.” Soon he’s grinning, hardly apologetic. I swoon at his white smile and teasing brown eyes even though he’s not looking at me. “Don’t stay up too late.” He makes a show of hardening his voice to sound stern. It doesn’t suit him. He’s not the type.

*He’s certainly my type*.

When his back his turned and he’s walking toward the staircase, I’m staring after him. I don’t even pick up on the fact that I’m moving to go after him until a hand latches on to my wrist and yanks me back.

“B-Bye!” I call after him without even thinking about it.

Drew glances over his shoulder and smiles—knowing—then gives me a two-finger salute.

There’s a loud groan and I’m being dragged down the hall. Once Drew’s head disappears down the stairs, the laughing ensues. Gina wheezes and Jodene holds her side, hunching over as she walks.

Von’s still clutching my hand as if I’m still a threat. I might be, there’s no guarantee I won’t go right back downstairs if she lets me go. It’s happened before.

When we’re in Von’s room, she has her fingers buried in her hair. She spins on me, eyes ablaze. “Why can’t you be that bold with Reese?”

Me, standing with my back pressing against the door, lets out a sigh and slide down until my ass hits the floor. “Cause he’s not Drew.”

She stares at me without words, then shakes her head. “You’re a lost cause, Santiago.”

I fall forward on my hands and knees crawling across the cold tile of her floor. “You don’t understand. He’s just- he makes me want things-”

“Okay!” Von cuts me off, holding her hands up and turning away, telling me she wants nothing to do with my thoughts and where they’re leading.

“She has a point Vee,” Gina says. She’s laying across Von’s huge bed on her stomach. “Drew’s hot as fuck for thirty-two.”

I turn to her. “Excuse me, his age doesn’t define him. And thirty-two is not old, that’s baby-making age.” I get up from the floor, crossing my arms.

“Okay, okay, ew!” Von complains. She’s sitting at her vanity, her hands over her ears as she visibly cringes through the mirror.

“What is it about this yacht?” Jodene says, bouncing on Von’s bed when she falls on to it on the opposite side as Gina. The thing is huge with four bedposts at each end with drapes that are now tied to them.

Von, more than happy to change the subject, hops on the topic. “My parents and Drew got me an early birthday gift. Kind of.” She adjusts herself in front of the mirror, raking her nails through her hair—pushing it back—as she leans closer to the mirror to inspect her edges.

“They got you a boat,” Gina says, incredulous.

Von’s eyes lifted to hers in the mirror and she shakes her head. “No,” she drawls, sitting back and reaching for her spray bottle. She sprays the liquid on the edge of her hair and taps it with a cloth while she replies. “I get the yacht for a day and I was thinking of changing some things,” she explains. “What do you girls think about a pool party this year?”

None of us reply right away but I can see it perfectly. Sailing across the dark ocean waters, the moon high in the night sky, stars twinkling…

“Hell yeah!” Gina says.

I nod, a smile stretching across my lips as more possibilities arise. One of them being Reese seeing me in a bikini. That’s the least of my thoughts though. Insignificant.

Von’s now lifting her lace front off her edges, but stops to spin around, her hands up in excitement. “I’m thinking we board before sunset. A water slide that leads into the ocean-”

“Water guns!” Jodene throws in giddily.

Von points at her, one black coffined nail jutting at our friend. “Yes.”

“Tubes,” I offer, being a little selfish about it since I see myself floating in the vast open water, staring at the sunset with a virgin mimosa in hand.

Von looks at me and says, “I really like how you girls are thinking. This is why we’re friends.” She winks before turning back to the vanity and slipping her wig off easily.

“But what if like… a shark comes up and-”

I roll my eyes as Von scoffs with a laugh at Gina’s thoughts taking a turn for the worst.

“You really need to stop watching so much *Jaws*,” Jodene tells her, patting her arm.

“I’m sorry, I’ve never been on a boat in the middle of the ocean. I’m nervous,” Gina says.

“I’m sure Lorenxo will more than happy to fight a shark for you,” Von says, her tone and expression teasing in the mirror. Gina drops her face to the peach-colored sheets and groans. She bangs her head against the mattress multiple times.

“Ou, did you invite him?” I ask. She looks up at me with an expression I can’t… place. It doesn’t look like the usual annoyance she shows at hearing his name and it makes me backtrack. “What?” I genuinely want to know what that look is. It makes me uncomfortable.

It’s Von who answers. “Nope, but I did.”

“And I still have no clue why you did that.” Gina’s voice is sharp, edgy. I understand why but not really. I know she tries to ignore and disregard him for the sole reason that he’s the definition of trouble. But when I see her talking to him—or him trying to talk to her—she does this thing where she tries not to look like she’s enjoying his company. We all see through it. She likes him and she’s doing everything not to show it.

After having a one-on-one with him two days ago and a few brief pleasantries before that, I can’t say I don’t see why. When he isn’t walking around like he’s about to ruin someone’s life, he can pass as a normal human being.

Von hums as she finishes removing the excess glue on her forehead and temples before removing the black spandex that covers her braided hair.

“Well, um,” Jodene says, breaking the unsettling silence, “speaking of guys, Jake kind of… asked me out.”

We all spin to her and she jumps up, holding out her hands like we’re a pack of wolves about to attack.

“It’s not re- he- when I-”

“Breathe,” I cut off her line of stuttering. She does and closes her eyes.

A few seconds later her words come out in a flash. “I gave him his invitation today because I didn’t want to seem pushy and eager by giving it to him on Monday, you know? So I gave it to him in the hallway just before fourth period and we were talking and talking and then he asked if I could be his date to the party and I told him I’d be serving like we always d-”

“Wait!” Von stops her. “Hold up, wait.” Shaking her head and hands, Von stands and turns, one hand dropping to her hip and her head tilting as she looks at Jodene. “You mean to tell me that hot piece of ass asked you out and you what? Turned him down? Are you crazy?”

Jodene shakes her head slowly. “We always serve,” she says, gesturing to me and Gina with her.

That is true. It’s something we’d always taken up because why not? We didn’t need to and we didn’t do it all night, just for the first few hours.

“And I didn’t turn him down. I just told him that, y’know, I might be serving the first few hours.” Before any of us can say anything to that, she’s already rushing out, “It doesn’t matter anyway, you know how my parents are. It’s not like he can come pick me up like a real date, anyway.” She looks away, hardly able to hide behind the bob of her dark hair.

The rest of us look at each and a smile split across our faces the same time as the plotting begins.

“Your parents don’t need to know *everything*, do they?” Gina says.

**† † †**

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