What's Coming

Silverware clanked on dishes as the large cafeteria-style room buzzed with conversation around them. When Carrie had asked Robert to join her there for breakfast, he’d been a bit reluctant. She assumed he was afraid they’d run into Victor, but she doubted someone like Mr. Anderson would ever take his breakfast in a room where there was an equal amount of Second Class passengers as there were people of his own social standing.
Robert was quiet as he sipped his coffee and took a few bites of his eggs. His eyes continued to dart around the room from time to time. Carrie considered eating faster so that they could leave, but she’d brought him here to apologize. It was just difficult to get the words out when he wasn’t saying much of anything at all.
“I’ve thought about our discussion,” she began, setting her fork down for a moment. “I want to apologize to you.”
Robert’s full attention was on her now. “Apologize? For what?”
“For how I behaved.” It was nothing unusual for her face to heat when she was looking into Robert’s eyes, but it was usually because he made her feel euphoric–not embarrassed. “I should’ve never thought that you would treat me so crassly, and I apologize for jumping to conclusions.”
“You don’t need to apologize,” Robert said, practically in a whisper.
“I do, though,” she disagreed. “I should’ve known better. Just because you’re happy to have the opportunity to meet Mr. Ashton, that doesn’t mean you’re not equally grateful to have become reacquainted with me.”
“I’m not equally grateful,” Robert said plainly. Her stomach twisted into a knot. He must’ve had a chance to think about it and realize that meeting her was not that much of an opportunity after all.
“I understand,” Carrie murmured.
“I don’t think you do.” Robert’s large hand came down on hers for a moment with a light squeeze before he pulled it away. “If I never had the opportunity to meet Mr. Ashton or pitch my idea to any man of means, I’d still be overly joyful at our chance to reconnect, Carrie. You are far more important to me than anything else.”
A small chuckle left her throat. “But… you have a chance to make your fortune.”
“You are worth much more than money could ever buy, Carrie. And if I’ve given you the impression that I feel any differently, I apologize. I’m the one who should be saying he’s sorry to you for ever making you feel like you were less important to me than money.” The sincerity in his brown eyes cut through to her very soul.
Shaking her head, Carrie said, “You haven’t. Only in a moment of misunderstanding, and that’s mostly my fault. I have a tendency to jump to conclusions.” Taking a deep breath, she continued, revealing more about herself than she ever liked to articulate. “I don’t have a lot of faith in myself most of the time, I’m afraid.”
“Well, you should,” he said. “You’re an amazing woman. Anyone who can’t see that is a fool.”
Feeling a weight lifted off her shoulders, Carrie thanked him, beaming a smile, and the two of them went back to eating their breakfast, talking about much less weighty topics. “We’ll be in Liverpool before too long. Then what are your plans?” she asked him as they finished up.
“I’m not sure,” he admitted. “I was thinking I might just turn around and go back to New York.”
“That’s probably for the best.” It wasn’t that Carrie didn’t want to spend more time with him, but the more they were together, the harder it was for her to control her emotions. “We can meet once I’m back in New York and sort things out then.”
With their breakfast gone, they stood, Robert pushing her chair in for her, and made their way out to the deck. “It is a lovely day,” Robert noted, holding the door open for her. “We should be near the coast of Ireland in a few hours.”
“That’ll be lovely.” Carrie stepped outside and felt the ocean air on her face for one of the last times. She was sad to know the voyage was almost over, but then, she’d have another adventure on the way home, she assumed. It would be nice to book a room near Robert’s and not have him be forced to sleep on the sofa. “Would you care to go for a stroll?”
“Actually, I have to go speak to Constable Pierce again.” Robert made a face as they stopped near the railing. “Victor put his hands on a woman last night, and I stopped him.”
Carrie’s eyes widened. “I had no idea.”
He lowered his eyes. “I didn’t want to worry you. But I’m sure Constable Pierce will handle it.”
Her mouth dropped open as she struggled to find something to say. That awful Victor Anderson! She hoped Robert had knocked his block off.
Behind her, Carrie heard the familiar sound of Hannah’s voice, and a smile lit her face. She turned to see the young girl pointing out into the water and excitedly calling to her governess who wasn’t paying her any mind at all. At least she’d have someone to spend the day with.
“I’ll catch up with you as soon as I’ve finished giving my statement–again,” Robert told her.
“All right.” Before he stepped away, Carrie reached out and put a hand on his arm, Ruth’s words echoing through her mind. “Do be careful, Robert. You know what the rumors are, about what may happen once we get close to land.”
His brow furrowed as his dark eyes met her lighter ones. “I’m not too concerned about it, Carrie. That being said, if anything should happen, please take care of yourself. I shouldn’t want to have to wonder if you were on the ship looking for me when you should be safely tucked away in a lifeboat.”
Carrie’s breath caught in her throat. She remembered the few times Mr. Ashton had spoken about what happened on Titanic. He was always very clear that he was able to take care of himself and survive because he knew that everyone else he cared about was already on a lifeboat–including Jonathon.
“I will take care of myself,” she promised.
With a nod, Robert leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. Carrie leaned up on her tiptoes to kiss him back, not caring that others may think it inappropriate. If it hadn’t been for Ruth’s voice playing over and over again in her mind, she might’ve been more demure, but her soul was stirred.
After a moment, Robert pulled away. “See you soon,” he told her. She nodded and watched him walk away, praying it was true and they’d be back together in time for dinner.
The sound of Jonathan’s footsteps approaching had her turning her head away from the spot where Robert had disappeared. “Where’s Robert off to?” He stopped beside her, his hands pushed down into the pockets of his trousers.
“To speak to Constable Pierce,” she replied. “But then, I suppose you already knew that.”
Jonathan gave her a small smile and a shrug. “Possibly. It looks like someone may have spotted some more dolphins.” Rather than tell her what he knew, he changed the subject, and she didn’t blame him.
“We should go spend some time with her. We’ll all be disembarking soon, and I will miss our new friend.” Carrie began to walk toward Hannah, Jonathan walking along beside her.
“It’s probably not a bad idea to keep an eye out,” he muttered, scanning the horizon.
“Do you think we are in danger?” Carrie smiled and nodded politely at a couple passing by, but on the inside, she felt her heart begin to race.
“There’s always some risk out here.” He sounded nonchalant. “Even when there shouldn’t be.”
“Yes, I know that’s true.” She didn’t think there was much risk of them hitting an iceberg at their current location, or for a piece of land to suddenly jut up out of the ocean and run them aground. She was more concerned about nefarious acts–like Germans performing an act of war.
“I’m sure we’ll be fine.” Jonathan’s tone was not convincing, but Carrie did her best to put her worries aside as they took up a spot next to Hannah against the railing.
“Did you see another dolphin?” Jonathan asked, smiling at the girl.
“I think so!” She laughed, pointing out at the ocean. “Something leaped out of the water out there. It was gray. It had to be a dolphin.”
Carrie caught Jonathan’s eye, and they both smiled and shrugged. Sometimes, one's eyes played tricks on them when trying to decipher shadow from submerged mammal.
“Let’s keep looking and see if any more leap out of the water,” Jonathan suggested.
For the next hour or so, they searched for dolphins and chatted with other passengers who stopped whenever Hannah insisted she saw one. Mrs. Smythe gave Hannah permission to go along with them as they walked to other parts of the ship, Hannah keeping an eye out for dolphins while Jonathan and Carrie watched for… something else.
Around lunchtime, Carrie’s stomach began to rumble. “We’ll be able to see the Irish coast soon enough,” Jonathan told the young girl. “That should be exciting.”
“I think I’m going to go have a quick bite to eat,” Carrie announced. “Would either of you care to join me?”
“Not yet,” Hannah protested. “I want to see Ireland.”
“All right. Well, I’ll catch up with you later.” She placed a hand on Jonathan’s arm, and he turned and looked at her, flashing an expression that said she should be careful. She nodded in understanding and headed off, her stomach still rumbling. She’d eaten most of her breakfast once she and Robert had settled the situation, but she still felt hungry for some reason.
In the dining salon, many of the other passengers chattered about how they’d be disembarking soon. A few mentioned the coast coming into view, and others seemed worried about the rumors they’d heard regarding German U-boats. One particularly boisterous gentleman said it was absurd to think the Germans would do something so bold, so crass. They hadn’t torpedoed any other ships–why would they start with Lusitania? Carrie thought it was a good point until someone else mentioned that they may have torpedoed other ships in the past few days since they’d set sail and they just hadn’t heard about it. The gentleman argued that the ship captain would know then and take good care of them.
Carrie hurried through her supper, not wanting to listen anymore. Once she was finished eating, she headed back out to the deck, absently wondering where Robert might be. She hoped his discussion with Constable Pierce had gone well and that Victor Anderson would finally get what he had coming.