Chapter 40: Taste of Dessert

Tonight I have finally realized why late night conversations have a deeper, more relational turn than the normal conversations that we have with others during the day.

I realized that as I laid down on Arthur’s chest while listening to the sound of his heartbeat. We were just wearing our undergarments as he wrapped me in a warm embrace. I turned my head to look at him, making my head rest on his shoulder as our faces were only inches apart. Our breaths mingled as we stared at each other intently. My heart was still racing in my chest and my body ached from a while ago.

“I just wanted to say...thank you for tonight.” I said genuinely as I flashed him a small yet sincere smile. Late night conversations always seem to hold more weight and teach you more about a person than you knew before. They seem to reach a deeper more truthful form of honesty than talking to someone during the day. They seem to have the power to turn a horrible day into a spectacular one, change my point of view on subjects that just that morning I viewed as unchangeable, and leave me wanting more.

And I think I know why. We often view the night as “me” time. It's the time we don't have to share with anyone else, but the fact I’m sharing it with him, means that he’s someone I genuinely love and care about. Someone I could fully trust and let in; to show the deep, intricate, hidden and heavy side to me that I usually don't broadcast to the world.

“No, thank you.” He said, kissing me on the forehead. My grin widened as my heart leaped with joy. He and I have definitely gone a long way, but one thing remains the same - the comfort and trust I felt with him the very first night has always stayed and I was foolish to not realize that sooner.

I hugged Arthur tighter and closed my eyes, savoring his warmth. I didn't want to leave his embrace. It felt as if when I was in his arms, all my pain went away - mental and physical, mostly the depressing pain. If I could only stay in his arms forever, then I would always feel safe from the world's harmful people.

I could only hope.

“I’m not going to sleep tonight.” He huffed as he widened and stretched his eyes with his fingers jokingly. I let out a small chuckle at his silly gesture.

“Why not?” I asked curiously. “I’m actually getting kind of sleepy.” I said with a yawn, my eyes started to tear up from sleepiness.

“You might be gone when I wake up.” He said honestly as I immediately felt a pang of guilt. I quickly sat up and looked at him apologetically.

“I’m sorry for just disappearing like that.” I muttered softly as I held his face with both of my hands. “Never again.” A quiet contentment spread through him as he nodded in response, his eyes were full of trust and love. I quickly went back to his arms to feel his warmth. I began to feel really sleepy as he gently stroked my hair. A yawn escaped my lips once again.

I awoke to the shift of Arthur’s body. I hadn’t realized that I fell asleep on his chest. I searched for my phone to check the time. It’s only 5 AM. I went back to sit on my side of the bed to admire his features. I lightly caressed his cheeks which made him shake his head.

Looking at his peaceful face made me realize how stupid I was back then. How could I even leave this kind, loving, and handsome man beside me? I know that my past actions doesn’t define me but I intend to make better choices in the future. I won’t leave him again.

I inhaled deeply before I snuggled back to Arthur’s body. He shifted once again to face me and hugged me close to his chest. I let out a happy and contented sigh before I went back to sleep again after a couple of minutes, enjoying this peacefulness.

“Good morning, beautiful.” Arthur’s husky voice woke me up from my slumber. I sleepily turned to his direction to see him smiling at me, making my heart flutter. He’s still handsome even if he just woke up.

“Good morning.” I croaked out, my throat felt dry. “How’s your sleep?” I asked him with a yawn as I stretched and sat up.

“It was great. How about you?” He replied as he moved closer to me. I quickly ran a hand through my disheveled hair to straighten it. I hope he doesn’t say anything about it.

I cleared my throat to speak clearly. “It was fine.” I told him casually as I struggled to wipe the dried drool from my face. He inched closer to me as he leaned to whisper something in my ear.

“I didn’t realize you could even look sexier than you already are.” His voice was low and sensual; it immediately sent shivers down my spine. When he moved away, his eyes darkened in color. I gulped nervously because of the intensity of his stare. He leaned in to kiss me but I raised my hand in the space between us, stopping him from moving any closer.

“Wait, I haven’t brushed my teeth yet.” I said shyly as I placed my hand over my mouth in embarrassment. He roared with laughter at my sudden confession. What? I didn’t want him to smell my morning breath. “Why are you laughing?” I asked him as my eyebrows furrowed at him.

He pulled me into his tight embrace “I couldn’t care any less about your breath.” He said sincerely before planting a soft kiss on my temple. “I don’t care about any of those things. I love you as you are.” He muttered on the top of my head and planted another kiss there.

What did he say? Did I hear him correctly? Did he say he loved me? I bolted right up and faced him. “What did you say again?” I hurriedly asked him. He only had a confused look on his face.

“What? The one about your breath?” He repeated in confusion as his eyebrows furrowed. I just shook my head at him.

“No, the last one.” His eyes widened as he thought about what I was asking about. He sat up straight, held my hand, and looked deeply into my eyes.

“I said I love you as you are.” He gave me one of his handsome smiles as he planted a kiss on my hand. I can feel the butterflies in my stomach go wild with his statement. I grinned at him and threw myself at him to hug him which made both of us fall down again on the bed. He just chuckled at my reaction.

“I love you too.” I whispered softly into his ears as he circled his hands on my waist. He used his muscles to flip the both of us. He was now on top of me.

“I so wanted to do this to you earlier.” Before I even replied he quickly cut me off by kissing me passionately. His kiss was warm and wet. My hands made its way up to his nape, enjoying the feel of his kisses. I kissed him with the same passion and intensity. He pulled away as we gasped for air. He rested his forehead on mine. Our breaths mingled with each other. As he steadied his breathing, he eventually moved away. “Come let’s have breakfast downstairs.” He told me as he stood up from the bed.

As I saw him put some clothes on, it made me think that I want to have this for the rest of my life. I wanted to wake up every morning with the man that I love. This made me envision the kind of life I want to have with him. My thoughts were interrupted by Arthur’s voice.

“You can use my clothes for now.” He said as he handed me over his shirt and his sweatpants.

“Oh thank you.” I grabbed them and went to the restroom to get dressed. It was too baggy for me since he’s much larger than me but it will do. I rinsed my face and gargled water to wash off my morning breath. As I felt satisfied with my appearance, I went out and saw Arthur on his phone. He quickly glanced up and saw me. His eyes darkened again.

“I should have known it’s a bad idea to lend you my clothes.” He murmured angrily. My eyebrows furrowed because of his statement. My heart sunk to the bottom of my stomach. Maybe I look ugly in it.

“Why? Do I look bad in it?” I asked him, hurt by his expression. He quickly bolted up and hugged me to comfort me.

“No, no, no. It’s not that. You looked beautiful in it.” He gently kissed the crown of my head. “I’m just afraid that I might eat the dessert first before breakfast.” His voice turned dangerously serious. I pushed him away but his eyes were still menacing.

“Let’s eat breakfast first.” I told him sternly. His eyes softened as he sighed in defeat. We walked towards the door together and walked outside. When he was about to close the door, I turned to him and told him to lower his head for me. “I’ll let you eat your dessert later.” I whispered to him and walked past him leaving him with his thoughts to himself.

How I wish things would just stay this way.