Chapter 75

(**Sebastion**)

The sounds of birds singing all around me makes me blink my eyes open. The early morning sun is shining through the trees around the backyard. However, it is the storm clouds on the horizon that has me sitting up on my makeshift bed of blankets.

Why is it that right after a few fantastic days, there is always a storm that brings gloomy feelings with it? Maybe what I am feeling is nostalgia after our family night last night. It stirred up all those old memories of my childhood before Theo died.

I look at the blanket beside me to see if Irina is still sleeping. She is sleeping soundly still, but the space between us where our children slept is empty. I whip my head around to look over the wide expanse of the backyard. There is no one out here besides me and Irina.

*Ari, are the kids inside with you?*

After a few moments, she responds and tells me they are in the kitchen helping Flynn make breakfast. With a laugh, she also tells me that if I don’t have any intention of getting soaked in the rain, I should bring Irina inside with me.

As if Mother Nature agrees with my sister, there is a clap of thunder a few seconds after she says this. Quietly, I stand up, then gently scoop Irina up off the ground. She wakes up as I step up onto the covered back porch. Those amazing ice-blue eyes of hers are still glazed with sleep, but the smile she gives me as she wraps her arms around my neck makes me stop in my tracks.

I love the way she smiles at me. After last night, I know I am the only man in her heart and mind. The ghost of Gustav is no longer haunting her feelings and thoughts. There is only me.

"Good morning, handsome."

"Good morning to you too, my beautiful mate."

I lean down to give her a brief kiss before I carry her into the house. The smell of freshly brewed coffee hits my senses the moment I step inside. My stomach rumbles as I smell pancakes, sausage, eggs, and bacon cooking in the kitchen.

Jace’s voice is the first I hear as I carry Irina down the hall towards the kitchen. He is bombarding Flynn with questions about how everything is made. How does he make the sausages, the bacon, and where does he get the eggs from? To his credit, Flynn explains that he gets them all from the grocery store. Then he explains how everything gets to the stores and where it comes from.

I peek my head in as I get to the door. Jace is standing on his little step stool with his elbows on the counter and his chin in his hands. He is watching Flynn cook and listening attentively.

"I can’t keep up with him, Irina," I say as I continue towards the stairs. "One day he wants to be a carpenter, then a teacher, and now he wants to be a chef like Flynn."

She laughs as I climb the stairs to head to our bedroom. After our fun in the woods last night, we were both in need of a shower. Then we will go downstairs to fill our stomachs with the rest of the family.

"Jace is so curious about everything. He has this thirst for knowledge that is amazing. Like last night while we were all star gazing. He wanted to know everything. We should get him a telescope. "

I thought the exact same thing last night.

"He amazes me more as each day passes. After everything he has been through, he still has such a gentle heart," I whisper.

When we reach our room, I gently lower her so she can put her feet on the floor. She walks into the bathroom to get the shower running, then comes back out to grab her robe off the end of the bed. I debate for a second about letting her shower alone because I know that once I get her naked, wet, and soapy, it will lead to more than showering.

The smile she gives me as she walks back towards the bathroom makes my decision for me. I pull my shirt up and over my head, then fling it to the floor as I walk towards her as she slips into the bathroom with a laugh. My little minx knows what she does to me and uses it to her advantage.

So, after thoroughly satisfying her desires in the shower and swiftly washing up, we both dress quickly to join the rest of the family for breakfast. Our shower fun made us later than I planned, but we just couldn’t keep our hands off each other. That is something I hope never changes between us as we grow older.

What has blown me away as our relationship progresses is that my desire for her transcends much deeper than just the physical aspect. Irina has a sharp mind, a kind heart, and the way she won my pack over just amazed me.

When I was taken from the pack during our meeting recently, I was told that she took charge of the situation quickly. She stepped into the role of Luna and made sure everyone was safe before starting the search for me. The pack’s needs and safety came before hers.

That is a true Luna. Something I denied my pack for my own selfish desires. Thank the Goddess I found Irina. Well, she found me first.

By the time we dress and get to the kitchen, everyone is already eating. The kids are all sitting at their small table, happily munching on their favorite breakfast foods. Arianna and Flynn are at the table by the window, talking as they eat. Thanks to Flynn and his thoughtfulness, there are two covered plates on the counter for Irina and me.

I grab both plates and follow Irina to the table. Flynn looks up with a knowing smile but says nothing. Arianna simply passes me the syrup for my pancakes. Sitting here as a family reminds me of the past again.

"When you have a moment free after breakfast, Ari, I would like some of your time," I tell her.

She glances at me in surprise but nods her head. "Is there something wrong?"

"No, not at all. I would just like to do something with you that is long overdue."

She doesn’t ask questions but merely nods her head again. I can see the questions in Irina’s eyes as I look at her. I tell her my plans after breakfast as we take Jace and Zasha to school. The walk back gives me plenty of time to tell her about my sudden bout of nostalgia.

"The three of you used to camp out like that when you were younger. My siblings and I used to do that too. Last night made you miss him, which is understandable. This time alone with your sister will be good for both of you."

"What will you do while I am with Arianna?"

"I will take the time to check on Oleg. My father tells me that Oleg is talking more. That he is starting to be more like who he used to be. Before..."

"Before Treadstone."

She nods. So much of her life has that single phrase attached to it. While my life has been normal up until Karma kicked me in the ass for my selfish behavior. That makes me feel even worse for everything she and the rest of her family went through while mine was safe behind our walls.

The walls that were built after the day my older brother gave his life for mine and Arianna’s. My father ordered the walls to be built around our entire territory. It cost a fortune to build, but in his grief, he didn’t care. He refused to lose another child or pack member to rogues.

Now we know that rogue packs are not the only thing we have to fear. The very humans we blend in with are our biggest enemies now. Well, not all of them, but a select group of them. I was raised not to fear humans because they are no real threat to our kind. Oh, how wrong that belief is now.

"Hey," Irina says as we stop in front of the door of her father’s house.

"I love you." We both say it at the same time.

"When do you want to reschedule your Luna ceremony and the one for your family to join the pack?"

"Let’s talk about that later tonight. Go spend time with your sister."

I pull her flush against me before she can spin around to open the door. My lips brush against hers softly in a tender kiss. Her arms twine around my neck as she kisses me back. I keep the kiss soft, just a light brush of my lips over hers as we press our bodies together.

When I break the kiss, I place a kiss on her forehead, then step back. "I will see you back at the house later. If you need anything at all, call for me."

Irina nods her head, then turns to open the door. I walk down the steps, then call my sister through the link we share. She asks what our plan is, so I tell her where to meet me, then I head that way. I thought of my brother while I was there last, but didn’t think to visit. I had other things on my mind at the time.

Now, as I make my way to the pack cemetery again, my heart is heavy for a different reason. Seeing my brother at the edge of the trees last night made me remember so many things that I had forgotten about him. So many of those memories are now bittersweet to remember.

As I stand before our family mausoleum, all the memories of Theo that I have locked away come flooding back. I worshiped the very ground he walked on. In my eyes, there wasn’t anything that he couldn’t do. Every time I had a problem, he would sit with me and walk me through the solution to fix it.

"How long has it been since you came here?" Arianna asks.

She stops next to me, then slips her hand into mine. That is also something that hasn’t happened in a long time. The need for us to comfort each other like this. She was my rock when my world fell apart. Now, here we are as a united team once again.

"The last time I came here was the day I took over as Alpha. It should have been him instead of me. I came to say that I am sorry for how our lives didn’t work out the way we thought. To promise him that I would do my best to make him proud of me. I failed."

Arianna let go of my hand so that she could open the door to the mausoleum. "Come, let’s go tell him all the things you have done for our pack now."

I follow her inside, then step up next to her as she stops in front of the wall of tombs. Her eyes are focused on the one where his name is engraved. I can’t help but feel like it should be me in that tomb instead of him. My life has been one selfish act after another.

"Theo was the best of us. It should have been me that day instead of him. Why did he have to be the one to die? I saw him last night, Ari. He was standing at the tree line in the backyard last night. He looked just like he did the last time I saw him."

"Oh, Sebastion. That is why you wanted to come here today, isn’t it?"

"Do you remember all the campouts we used to have with him? Not just the stories he would tell or the way he would roast the marshmallows for us, but that feeling of being with him."

Arianna slips her hand back into mine, then pulls me back to sit on the marble bench that faces the wall of tombs. I let her because I don’t have the strength to deny her this moment. We both need this time together. For us and for him.

"He would always make sure my jacket was zipped up and my shoes were tied before we went anywhere." She says.

"I remember it took you forever to learn to tie them on your own."

"It didn’t. I just enjoyed having him do it for me. He made me feel protected when he always checked my shoes and jacket before we left the house."

I let go of her hand so that I can put my arm around her. She leans her head onto my shoulder. We sit in silence for a few minutes. Both of us deep in our memories of the brother we lost too soon. After what happened that day, our family was never quite the same.

"Do you think our father blamed us for Theo’s death? We were out too far, and we knew we shouldn’t have been there at all. I know he never said it, but I felt it sometimes."

"We were just kids, Sebastion. We didn’t know the dangers that lurked out there. Our parents don’t blame us for what happened."

"When I saw him last night, he nodded and smiled at me before walking away. I think he approved of what we were doing with the kids. What we were doing as a family."

"We should do that more often. Like once a week or something."

"I agree. With two more babies on the way, it is a good time to bring back some of our traditions. Do more things as a family."

We spent the next few hours talking about all the things we used to do together that we would love to do with our children and mates. When the light shining through the stained-glass windows fades, we walk out of the mausoleum to head home.

I close the door behind me as I leave. The memories of Theo will always be tinged with the pain of his loss, but remembering how he loved us makes me feel happier. If Irina and I have a boy, I would like to name him after my older brother.

"If you or Irina have a boy, how would you feel about naming him after Theo?

"That would be perfect. However, I am fairly certain I am having another girl. The food cravings are the same as when I was pregnant with Callie."

We laugh together as we walk back to the house. Irina is due in four months, while Arianna has three months until she is due. I guess that means it is a waiting game unless Irina decides she wants to know the gender of our baby at our next appointment with the doctor.

Maybe it will be a boy.