#Chapter 64: Letting Go and Creating More Doubts

Olivia’s POV
I would be lying if I said that what Gabriel had told me was weighing heavily on my heart and mind. Even though he never gave into temptations of being with another woman, he did not fully commit to his marriage with Rebecca. But he was fully committed to my happiness and being with me.
It unnerved me. So much so that I did not see the man bump into me. I thought I would fall to the ground, but strong hands caught me at my waist. Aa I pushed back the curls out of my face to see the man that had aided me, I saw eyes of sadness and frail.
“Herold?”
I saw his Adam’s apple bob while he contemplated answering me.
“It is good to see to my Queen,” he said nonchalantly.”
I tried to keep my composure in the situation, knowing that anyone could see us and get the wrong idea.
“I am glad that you are doing alright.” I smiled. I requested we sit at a restaurant and talk for a while. Gabriel would be in another state discussing policies, and I’ll admit I was lonely.
After a few drinks, I felt my inhibitions take over as my knuckles grazed Herold’s. We had a booth away from the door and order several rounds of drinks. I could not remember how many I was on at this point.
Herold saw my state and began to worry. “Maybe I should get you back to the palace, Queen Luna,” he said as he slid out of the booth to give his card to the front. My lids grew heavy as the alcohol relaxed me.
I saw a hand up close extend towards me. I looked at the arm and saw a few freckles and scars from battle. The forearm was clean of any marks or damages, but I knew the body attached had been through so much. I nursed it back to a state of health only to have it betray me for another.
I watched the arm lift me by my waist and escort me out of the building. I smiled as I leaned into his touch, into his scent. He smelled like crisp timber that he would cut during the cold nights.
“I miss that,” I muttered.
“What was that love?” Herold said as he pressed his lips to my temple.
“I miss your touch,” I said, looking down at the ground. Watching our freet was easier than watching the lights pass by. Hell, it was easier than trying to focus on anything right now.
“I doubt everything right us…my marriage…”
“Shit, you are plastered.” Herold growled.
“I am not drunk. I just miss that you and I ….I miss what we could have been.” I said. I knew I was fading in and out of the conversation. Because the only thing I remebered was his saying “that he could not bring me into the palace in my condition.”
I shrugged it off as I completely fade to black.
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Third Person POV
When Olivia’s eyes slid open, she noticed she was not in her bed, nor was she in her marital bed that she shared with Gabriel. As she slowly tried to stand up, she felt her head throb and aches any movement.
Olivia saw something in the peripheral of her vision that could aid her. She glanced over to her right to see a brochure on the nightstand stating a hotel of a name she could not place. She also saw her phone and jewelry had been removed prior to her snooze. But what made er happy was to see a glass of water that was still cold and quick pain relief medicine next to all the other items.
Olivia quickly threw the pills down her throat and gulped down the container of liquid. Sleeping it off and helped the headache more than she thought she would. She took a deep breath as she heard sounds coming from the bathroom.
“Gabriel?” She questioned as she tried to stand. But when the door came to open, it was not her mate but Herold. She swallow and closed her legs tightly at the sight she saw.
Herold was wearing only a towel as he stepped out of the room and stopped when he saw Olivia. His face turned joyous quickly when he saw that she was awake.
“Good to see that you are feeling better. I never saw you drink that much,” Herold added as he made his way over to her.
“Where are we?” she asked, looking around.
“It my hotel room. I am in town right now on business with a few diplomats and alphas, making sure there is no threat to the packs.”
Olivia nodded. It had been a while since she heard Herold discussing anything pack related to her. Not since she had been captive by both sides of the war. Not since Alicia had run back into Herold’s arms.
She snapped out of her thoughts when she felt his hands graze her face and his thumb rub her chin. He was careful with his touch after all these years. She moved her head into her touch as she closed her eyes.
“I have been dreaming about this for so long,” she whispered. But when she uttered the words, she wished she could take them back. IT was weak to admit her feelings. And she was mated to another Alpha, their King, to be precise.
“I am sorry for everything that I had done to us,” Herold said as he kissed her temple. “Please forgive me, Olivia.” Olivia looked up into his gaze and could feel her body grow heavy. Her gaze moved from Herold’s eyes and landed on his lips.
Moments passed as they sat on the bed before anyone made a move. Olivia leaned in forward and pressed her lips to Herold’s. She could see his eyes widen in shock before snatching her by her waist and planting her in his lap.
“So you were not lying last night when you said you thought of us,” Herold growled as his kiss grew more demanding and taking over Olivia. She gasped when she remembered he was only in a towel when she felt his appendage graze on her leg. She moaned into the kiss as she arched her body into his touch.
Pulling her top over her head, Herold stripped Olivia down and laid her on the bed. He ran his fingers down her frame and kisses her covered breast before slicing the clothing with his nail. She moaned as he took her harden nipple in his mouth and kneaded the other with his hand.
Olivia grounded her pulsing bud against the organ that was pushing against her with every second that she and Herold touched. He released his hold on her nipple and moved down lower to give her body the attention that she craved. Without hesitation, Herold pulled down Olivia’s pants and panties to reveal herself to him.
She hummed as she felt Herold slid his digit into her clit. Olivia moaned his name over and again as he pushed and pulled against every ridge in her body.
“You kept denying me,” Herold said as he pushed another digit into her wetness.
Olivia mewled as she felt herself get closer with every pump.
“Please… don’t stop,” she moaned as she felt Herold remove his fingers from her core. Her breath was ridged as he tried to control her breathing.
“Tell me,” Herold growled in her ear. “I want to hear you say it, love,” he coaxed her as he pushed his index to her bud. He pushed and rubbed himself, coating his cock with his juices.
“I want you,” Olivia cried and as she utter the words Herold longed to hear his forgotten mate, he slid into her and pushed her body over the edge.
The night before felt like a blur. Olivia’s body ached all over and as she pushed her head against the bed frame, she bit her lip, pondering her situation. Herold had not woken up yet. Olivia could hear it in his breathing. While Herold had cut her bra and it laid on the floor in the bedroom’s front floor, she could still make out the rest of her clothing. Thankfully, everything else was in one piece.
Olivia slid out of bed, gathered her clothing, and headed to the shower. She let the scalding water hit her body as she tried not to cry. Olivia had given herself to both of the men in her life and, just as she thought;
I lost myself and my mission in their touch.
I ducked under the showerhead, trying to erase the memory of the nights I spent screaming into Gabriel’s shoulder as he took me in places that I could never imagine. I cried as I visited the previous night that Herold explained and dominated my body. My fears had come true; I had become their plaything.
As I shut off the water and exited the shower, I could hear movement from the bedroom. Herold had finally woken up. My wolves whimpered at teh thought of facing him, and I could not say that I was looking forward to it either. I quickly got dress finding a safety-pin in the sink’s drawer and fastening it to the front of my bra. I could discard it after I left. Or burn it.
When I exited out, I saw Herold putting his pants back on. I turned my head to the side, giving him some privacy. He strived over to me, cupping my chin in his hands and bring my lips to his.
“Don’t be modest now, not after last night.” He said, putting his shirt on. I shook my head.
I did not need to be reminded about what we had done.
I grabbed Herold’s hands and pulled them away from me. “I am sorr—”
“Don’t finish your sentence. Do not say it was a mistake.” Herold said. I could hear the anger in his voice. I could see the hurt in his eyes. I wanted to tell him it should not have happened, both we both knew.
“I will take you back to your car. You can be with your king,” Herold spat as he walked out of the room. I swallowed my tears and grabbed my possessions, shoving everything on the nightstand into my pockets. I wiped my face and shut the door behind us. Hopefully, what happened last night would not come to the surface.