You can't die
Just a few moments ago.
I hugged him, and he said something quietly. "I know you love me and will always love me. Elena, I want a baby girl like you. "He kissed my cheek and pushed me as he said this.
Recently.
I was in the car. My full sentence appeared to come to a halt. He abandoned me, and he abandoned me forever.
I can't even see him even if I try, I can't hear his voice even if I try, and now I can't even say I love you. Nobody will listen to me. Why do you let me face this, God, when I try to move on? Why do you always put me in such a dilemma?
Remembering the past.
"We'll stick together, Elena. I swear, I'll build a house like this. Then there will be you and me, "tiny Paul stated with a smile.
"It's you and me."
"I love you, too," I say, tears streaming down my cheeks.
You've been gone for three and a half years. Dad is doing well now, but I am in charge of his business. When I first came, I saw my photos in your room. Everything is dangling there. You decorated the room with all of my favorite things. I didn't make any changes there. I claimed your room as my own. Our daughter is now three years old. I gave her the same name as you. Actually, it's Derek, not me. Derek gave his daughter the same name as you. It's called "Pavlina." I know that Derek has known from the start that I love you. He also knew I'd never love him as much as I do you. He, on the other hand, has no complaints. He is completely devoted to Pavlina and me. You know, she has a striking resemblance to you. Surprisingly, the small version of you has the same eyes, hair, and nose. I gazed at her, surprised, as she fell asleep in Derek's arms. I can't even hold her in my arms because her fragrance reminds me of yours. It appears that I have you in my grip.
Late at night,
I was working on my laptop when Pavlina walked up to me and said, "Mom'ma."
"Why are you here, Pavlina? It's time for you to go to bed, "I murmured, avoiding her gaze. I'm unable to look at my daughter. When I look at her, I can no longer hold back my emotions. "Wai-ting for you," she replied. "Today is not the day. I'm now busy, "I declared. She said, "Ple-ase." She stroked her fingers across my hand, trying to get into my lap. When I saw her fingertips, my hands trembled and I closed my eyes. I held her in one hand so she wouldn't fall off of my lap.
"Mo-ma." I had a panic attack when Pavlina touched me. I couldn't keep myself in and began to shudder, even though I couldn't breathe well. "Mo-ma, wha-t's wrong?", I heard Pavilna's voice, but everything was about to blank out.
I opened my mouth to breathe oxygen, but I couldn't. Someone instantly grabbed me and tried to calm me down. "It's all right, honey. Continue to take deep breaths. I'm here. "
He stroked his hands on my back. In my hands, I have no power. When I regained my senses, I felt so weightless in my arms. Did Pavilna slip off of my lap? When I opened my eyes, I saw Derek rubbing my back and Pavilna on his other arm. Thank God, she is OK. She said, "Mom-ma, cry." I lowered my sights. "Honey, are you all right now?" Derek asked. I took the inhaler with a nod. Pavlina remarked, "Dad-dy, mom-ma cry." "No baby, she was a little sick. Let us now go to our room. Daddy is going to tell you a story. Say goodbye to your mom, "Derek said. "Goodnight, mom-ma," she said, kissing my cheek. Derek accompanied her into her room. My eyes filled up with tears. I can't even give my daughter a kiss.
One hour later,
Derek approached me. "Elena," he said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "Derek," I said, tiredly. 'Babe, it's too late. Now put an end to it. "You're putting a lot of pressure on yourself," he remarked. I smiled at him and kissed his hand. "I'm ju-," he interrupted abruptly, "Elena, you don't have to work." I've got plenty for all of us. "Can't you give some attention to your health?"
"Derek, we almost talked with a lot of physicians, but it didn't work out well," I said, looking down." Nobody will be able to help me with this panic attack, Derek." Derek's point of view.
I'm well aware that you're slowly perishing on the inside. You're putting yourself through a lot of pain.
"Elena, she needs you," Derek remarked. "You're with her, and I just—" He came to a halt in front of me and knelt down. "She needs you more than I. She needs her mother, "he murmured, holding my hand. "You've got to conquer your fear, sweetie. You must take a stand for us. I'll take you to the best doctor available. But, all you have to do is cooperate with them, "he remarked.
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