Origin
POV: Alexandra
My hands trembled as I re-read the letter in my hands and I pulled my other hand to my face to stifle the sob that threatened to escape me. My father had already pulled me into an embrace and the carriage fell silent where before it had been jovial with Ny explaining all the great things in Blackwood Deep to Jheelis. All eyes fell on me as I sat there and sobbed into my father's chest. He offered me a handkerchief with the family emblem on it. Every once in a while he placed gentle pecks and reassuring rubs on my back until he finally said, “It wasn’t your fault, little rose. I know you feel responsible but you did your best.” I muttered into his chest, “It wasn’t good enough. I could have saved her.” Jess shook her head, “You cannot save everyone, Xan. You aren’t a God.” I sat up and looked at her, “Am I not? I have the soul to be one. Who knows what I could have done for her if I had sacrificed myself to save her? No, not just her! How many countless others senselessly died because I just had to rest? How many had to suffer?” Ny leaned over and touched me, “At what cost would you save them? You cannot purchase their lives with yours.” I looked at her, “Couldn’t I? I will become the Goddess Solamor upon my death. Could I have used my powers then to save countless lives if I wanted to?” I heard a voice, “It doesn’t work that way, dove.” Apollo appeared in the seat next to Ny. I looked at him, “What do you mean?” He sighed, “Gods are not so powerful as all that. We have the power to intervene, but the cost is huge. Think about if you save the life of that child. The balance of the world will always come to collect. Which life would it cost? Yours? Your father’s? Perhaps Lucy? Likely Lucy would be the one to suffer because that is the balance of the world. It gives and takes in equals, that is how your power would work in this sense.”
I looked down at my hands silently cursing them for now working faster, more efficiently, “Lucy…what do I tell that poor child? Tilly was her best friend and now I have to tell her that my best wasn’t good enough.” Apollo pulled a letter out and handed it to me, “All Mighty thought that it would be difficult for you. He had Hades pull her soul before he sent her on to her final place. He assisted her in writing a letter to Lucy. Amazingly enough, he was all too happy to help out.” I looked up at him startled, “Grumpy Sexy Hades?” He chuckled, “I don’t know why you would characterize him as sexy but grumpy is accurate.” I shrugged, “Tall, strong, mysterious, good-looking, and brooding. Yeah, no…not sexy at all.” He winked at me, “Got you smiling.” My father gave him a thumbs up, “Excellent job. I should have known laughter and talking about boys would get her.” I nudged my father in the arm, “Hey! I’m not shallow that talking about boys as you say would pull me out of a depressive funk.” Ny giggled, “I don’t swing that way but even I thought Hades was sexy when he came to arrest Loki.” My father looked at me, “Loki was there?” I nodded, “He was in the King’s court. Not to worry Sebastian had my back and so did Apollo.” My father gave Apollo another appreciative glance, “Have I ever told you how much I appreciate you?” He laughed, “We both love our daughter and would do anything to protect her. No thanks needed. I have to get going. I hope the letter helps cheer your child up. She’s one of us now.” He winked at me again and left.
We rolled up to Blackwood where my mother and Lucy were waiting for us. She came running towards me and wrapped her arms around my legs, “I missed you soooo much, Alexandra. I hope you get to stay home much longer this time.” She smiled up at me and I returned her smile wearily. She continued, “I saw the pretty birdie that you were gifted with. Her cage was too heavy and large to go up to your room so they placed her in the study. She has such a pretty song too.” My father shot me a knowing look, “Oh really? I think we should go look at her in a bit. Can you go check on her for me?” She nodded and skipped inside as I turned to Ny, “Can I ask you a favor?” Ny smiled and nodded, “Of course, whatever you need.” I sighed, “I think I’m going to need your help breaking the news to her. Oh and Jess you too. You both have the gift of empathy so you’re probably going to know exactly what to say to her after I break the news to her.” Both women put a hand on my shoulder and nodded. I patted each of their hands, took a deep breath, and said, “Right, we should probably get to it then.” My mother walked up and rubbed my back, “I know it won’t be easy, Xan. If you need to talk to someone after, you know I’m always here.” I smiled at her weakly, “Thanks, Mom. It is a comfort to know you will be around for me.”
The three of us walked into the house and went straight to the study, “How is our bird?” She smiled up at me, “She’s resting now. Have you named her yet?” I shook my head, “I haven’t. Perhaps you can help me name her. What do you think?” Her face lit up, “That would be amazing! I’m going to have to think long and hard about what she would like to be named.” I suddenly remembered that she could possibly be a beast tamer and knew that now that I was home that I could expect a note from Enzo about his test for her. I took her hand in mine, “Lucy, can we have a little chat?” She nodded, “Of course, you’re my amazing mommy figure now. You can talk to me about anything.” I pulled her over to the settee and placed her on my lap. I figured holding her would be best to break this news and I looked up at Ny for validation. She nodded at me reassuringly so I started to speak, “I am going to tell you something now that is really hard for me to say.” She shifted on my lap and wrapped her arms around my neck, “It’s okay for you to cry, I will always be here to help you. I will be your bandage for your heart ouchie.” Like many times before, this conversation with her was melting my heart. I smiled at her, “I appreciate that but I think maybe I need to be your bandage for your heart ouchie today.” I sighed, “I got a letter from the nice doctor out in the Glades. Did you know people were getting really sick out there?” She nodded, “That’s why I had to leave without you, right?” I nodded, “Well, one of the first people to get sick was Tilly.” Her face turned from a smile to sadness, “I knew she wasn’t doing so well. She didn’t look good. Is she okay now?”
I drew in a deep, sharp breath, “No, baby. She’s not well. She got really sick and we did everything we could to make her feel all better but it wasn’t enough. She was called to the afterlife.” Tears started to flow down her small face, “Sh-she died?” I started to cry too and nodded, “I’m so sorry. I wish my potion would have cured her but I was too late. It’s all my fault.” She shook her head and hugged me again, “No! You tried your best to heal her ouchies but it was too much. She gets to be with her doggy Roy now. She’ll be so happy.” We held each other and cried for a while about this until the child popped her head up suddenly. She hopped down from my lap and rubbed her face with her sleeve. I was appalled at the action, “Don’t use your sleeve to wipe your face, Lucy.” I stopped myself and was even more appalled at how much I sounded like my mother. She smiled, “Sorry, Xan. Azula just spoke to me.” I looked at her confused, “Who is Azula?” She pointed at the cage, “That’s her name. I named her that and she likes it. Anyhow, she said that someone in Seely is going to want to talk to you.” I was further confused since I knew that if anyone wanted to talk to me it would be a psychic. I thought to myself that maybe there was a delay between the bird and me. Suddenly Syl’s voice sounded in my head, “Alexandra. Are you there?” I spoke out loud, “Syl?” A relieved sigh came, “Oh good, I was skeptical that this would work. I am contacting you because I did some digging and found out a few things. First off, my mother was slipped a potion to put her in love with my father. From what I can tell, Lytir stole this potion from Aphrodite. You might want to let her know that this is going on. Do you think the light-healing potion will work on her?” I looked back at Ny, “I don’t know. It might be something that I have to talk to Aphrodite about. I’ll summon her in a bit to talk to her.”
Lucy looked up at me amazed that I could summon a God and it dawned on me she didn’t know that I was the daughter of two Gods and was declared a living Goddess. I spoke to Syl again, “Do you know how it was slipped to her?” She was silent for a bit, “Sorry, I’m trying to stay quiet. I’m in the library where I met a hooded man who said he could give me the information I sought and something for you. He believes that helping you will help save Seely as well. He wouldn’t tell me who he was but his voice sounded very familiar.” There was a short pause and she spoke again, “I think I need to move to my room, I will contact you when I get there.” Silence followed and I looked down at Lucy, “Thank you for letting me know about that. It probably would have been off-putting.” She nodded at me, “It wasn’t really me. It was Azula. She didn’t want to interrupt us but she didn’t want you to be startled suddenly. She said that the nice man that gave her to you wanted her to take care of you.” I smiled at the little bird, “Thank you so very much Azula.” I felt a tug at my shirt, “She’s going to speak again soon and Azula says you’re welcome.” Syl’s voice came back through my mind, “Okay, I am in my room now. So the second thing I need to tell you is about that disease in Vellum.” I was confused as to what her father knew about the disease in Vellum, “What about it?” She sighed, “Well apparently Loki gave Lytir a potion that he had stolen from the God Nergal. They wanted to test your ability to pick up the power that would lead you to the power they need from you. Loki had Lytir slip some to a child in the Glades and my father used the potion as a premise to get you here.” I plopped down on the settee and buried my head in my hands and sobbed a little. Nystasia gracefully sat down next to me and put her arm around me, “What is going on Xan?” I pulled my face slightly away from my hands, “It’s all my fault. People died…because of me.”
