37- Because I have to believe

Mathias was not a particularly good kisser. Mia was determined not to compare everyone to Ignacio or his way of kissing, because everyone lost out. Even without counting Ignacio, Mathias was not the best kisser.
However, there was a reason why she had gone out with him several times and all
their dates ended in the backseat of his old Toyota. They had not done much
more than kiss, and Mia was not going to go beyond that.
What kept her coming back to Mathias was neither love nor his kisses.
Her heart still missed Ignacio, and only Ignacio. But she could not be with him
and she could not keep walking around the house making long faces. Or, at least, that
was what Seila and her father told her all her lives and reincarnations.
That was how she ended up here with Mathias, giving in to physical impulses that somehow felt wrong and totally right at the same time.
Even if she were still just human, it would have been fun. Mathias was sexy
and sweet, and he made her laugh. But it was her mermaid half that wanted him so badly, that
almost demanded physical contact.
Truth was, she was getting restless. Thea had warned her what could happen
if she didn't eat. Technically she only needed to eat once, before the solstice
or the equinox, but the more lives and reincarnations she went without eating, the more irritable and agitated
she would become.
There were a few tricks to keep hunger at bay: one of them was swimming
with
The Afa's Baby and His Mermaid Moon by Mia Antonella C.R - Page 5
frequently, which Mia did whenever she could. Another was singing, but Mia
was too afraid to try. She didn't want to accidentally jinx someone. The
third was not so much staving off hunger as giving in to it. And that was what she
was doing with Mathias. She kissed him to keep from biting him.
When he kissed her deeply and pushed her back against the car seat,
she felt her insides stir. A warm heat filled her stomach that
made her skin tingle, like when her legs turned into fishtails.
The mermaid wanted out, and there was something strangely wonderful about
stopping her. It was Mia who was in control, not the monster, and when Mathias
kissed her neck, she stood firm on the dividing line between mermaid and
human.
Mia could only quiet the mermaid desire inside her when
his hand began to slide under her skirt, running over the soft skin of her thighs. Her skin stopped throbbing, the heat inside her cooled, and Mia sat up and gently pushed him away from her.

“Oh, sorry,” Mathias said, still breathing heavily as he moved away from her.

“Did I go too far?”

“You know the rules.” She gave a slight shrug and smoothed out her skirt.

“I’m not going any further.”

“I’m sorry.” She grimaced and pushed her dark hair back from her forehead.

“I got a little carried away. It won’t happen again.”

She smiled at him.

“Okay. I’m sure you’ll stick to the rules better next time.”

“And when will the next time be?” Mathias asked.

He was kneeling on the seat, his blue eyes sparkling. Mathias was a lycan,
he had the typical attractiveness of models—a boyish face, thin and
strong features—but he also had an aura of genuine kindness about him.
Most likely, the way he treated her had more to do with his
mermaid attraction than with what he felt for her. Mia had not used her songs
on him, so she did not have him enslaved. But his physical appearance also gave him
power, and the werewolves found it difficult not to pay attention to him.
Mathias was a couple of years older than her, but they knew each other from school. Although
he was attractive and popular, he had never harassed the other werewolves. During the few
lives and reincarnations they had been dating, he had never spoken ill of anyone, and it had never occurred to
him to challenge her.
That was what led Mia to always go back to him. He was not dangerous. She
liked him, but not too much. Whatever magic spark had made her fall in love with Ignacio, Mathias did not possess her at all. When she was with him, she had everything completely under control: her emotions, the monster, and even him.
She would never hurt him, and he could never hurt her either.

“Of course there will be a next time,” Mia told him, and his face lit up.

“Great. I don’t think I could ever forgive myself if I screwed everything up.”

“You’d be surprised at the things people are capable of forgiving each other for,” Mia said
under her breath.

“What?” Mathias asked.

“Nothing.” She shook her head and gave him a forced smile. “How do I look?”

“Gorgeous, as always.”
Mia laughed.

“No, I mean… has my makeup run?” Can you tell I've been
making out with someone in the backseat of a car?
Mathias leaned over to inspect her