Chapter 36 YOUR HUMAN.

MONDAY
For the next two days I made sure I did the complete opposite of what Tia had told me. After I told the others after all the things we did together and finally getting that off my chest. Jhan told me to be more careful. Tia merely smiled. Jereum clearly glowered and Leya patted me on the shoulder.
I spent the hours trying to devise a way to speak to the wolves, to go to them in a way that would not cause the beasts to attack and rip me to shreds. The wolves didn't like us. The way they spoke when they mutilated me. I wanted so badly to dash into that forest and bellowed until one of those giant wolves comes out of nowhere.
But I knew inside me that I was scared. I was scared of them and thinking about my encounter with them only made me more scared. I had barely escaped the last time and going in there again only made me more freighted.
But anyhow it was I had to communicate with them. Both powerful species have a mutual enemy which can also bring us together in a long run.
I was sitting on the kitchen counter. Leya was cooking something that should—if I didn't only have a taste for blood—smell nice.
She hummed as she cooked. I watched her for some time. The way she put so much spirit into cooking made me question her vampirism.
I heard Tia walk up to me. She had been managing with Dawn for the two days I stayed away from her. I stayed away from Dawn because I didn't want to cause any more harm to her. It was my fault she's hurt and being around her will only cause her more damage. The concept was messed up but it was the least I could sum up.
"Kaldar!" She sounded angry.
"Yeah," I said, still watching the meat fry in the pan as Leya added a brown spice.
"She needs you."
"No, she needs to be healed so she can go home," I said firmly.
"What are you talking about? Don't you love her?"
"I do, and that's why I can't be around her."
Leya continued as if she wasn't a word we were saying. Humming her calming tone away.
"Can you even hear yourself? She's never been more hurt in this pass two days. And she's always asking me of you; I'm tired of lying that you go on patrols with us."
No one spoke again, and the only sound, apart from the boiling and cooking, in the room was the peaceful and solaceful humming from Leya.
"Then don't... Tell her I don't want to be with her again."
"What?"
Even Leya paused what she was doing for a second. Unable to pretend that she wasn't hearing our conversation anymore. She glanced at me from the corner of her eyes before continuing.
"You really are a demon," Tia said.
Jhan and Jereum were not at home. Jereum couldn't stand the smell of warm human and Jhan was trying to handle some political issues with the higher court on the account of the ginger wolf they had caught.
Tired of pretending that I didn't care, I stood from the counter and walked up stairs. I got to my room and opened the door. Dawn was on my bed with her legs crossed. My room had been newly decorated by Leya. She looked up from the book she had in her hands. I saw her pupils dilated and the happiness that spread about her face.
"Kaldar..." She breathed out, as she let the book drop and rushed to me. Hugging me tightly. Her body was soft, too soft. I didn't know if I was just noticing it now or if it was because I thought her to still be tender from the attack.
I didn't hug her back. I couldn't show her affection and that made the affection she showed to me sting. Like I was being stung by multiple bees. A cold tear rolled down my face and I brushed it away with my hand.
"Tia told me you were out with that scary guy," I knew she meant Jereum, "I wanted to see you so badly but he told me he'll eat me if I leave."
She looked at my face. I looked back at her blankly.
"Kaldar? What's wrong? You look sad."
I looked into her eyes. Their natural bright blue colour was greyish now. But they had been worse before so I had hope of a full recovery.
"Aren't you happy to see me?"
"I'm sorry," I said.
"For what?"
"For everything; for causing this to you, for meeting you after I saved you. For kissing you."
She was heavily confused. Her eyes danced about my face.
"Why? Why are you apologizing?" She was beginning to sound hurt. I could her it in her voice. She had her hands wrapped around me body. She pressed her head back to my chest. She was so small when brought close to me.
"Kaldar you are scaring me..."
I hugged her back and for a brief moment I felt peace. More alive. The loads of guilt and hatred I had for myself lifting off me just a little before crashing back on me and I let go of her.
"Why won't you hug me?" She still had her head on my chest as she spoke. "You are the only person I can be with in this place."
"Dawn..."
"Yes?"
"Does your face still hurt?"
"I mean... Just a little. The medicine the little girl uses is working very effectively."
"Dawn..."
"Yes Kaldar."
"Do you hate me?"
She looked up at me. Clearly shocked by my question.
"No... Why would I ever hate you? I love you."
The last words seemed to slice through me. I literally felt a sharp pain shoot up my chest to my neck.
I looked at her. Looking at her beautiful face now etched all over with worry. She didn't understand. She didn't know that she was captured by that psychopath because of me. I had to tell her, I needed her to know the truth. It was my fault and it was only fair that she knew the true story.
"Dawn... The reason why you were captured by that man... It's because of me."
I saw the confusion on her face grow into befuddlement. I stepped away from her and her hands dropped.
"What do you mean?" She asked lowly.
"It was my fault you were dragged to that forest and almost killed."
Her face twisted with rage.
"GET OUT I DON'T EVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!"
But I returned to reality.
It was all in my head.
She never got angry not she never bellowed those words. She was still standing there, just looking at me with more confusion.
"How, how could it have been your fault?" She asked.
"That man wanted revenge on us. On my family. So he captured you and Leya—that little girl—and almost killed you both."
I watched her expression. It was of deep hurt.
"It's okay if you don't want to see me again I'll under—"
"How could you even think such a thing? I, wouldn't want to be with you?"
I looked at her in disbelief.
"Kaldar it wasn't your fault. That man was a mad man—"
"But don't you see? If we keep on being together, more crazies like him may come after you."
"We'll face them. Together."
"But you are only human..."
She walked closer to me. Gently wrapping her hands around my body and resting her head on my chest.
"I am your human..."