46

She stepped back from him with a gasp, "I don't understand you. After everything that happened..."
"Damn it. I was afraid about this. You can't leave me, Kara." he almost shouted the words but the desperation in his voice overpowered it. He stepped forward to hold her but she stepped back, "I am accepting my fault in this and I am damn well aware you are angry about it and I am angry that you hid about it from mean plotted all this but it is equally my fault. I know I should not have plotted all that that but at least listen to my ex-"
Kara looked at him in confusion, "You had changed your mind when I was with you?"
"That was past and damn with everything that happened or what would have happened. Just say you are not going to leave me. I need you with me."
Kara shook her head in confusion. She could not understand him, or rather did not even want to at that point. She turned around and ran inside her room, slamming the door shut behind herself. 
His each word echoed in her mind like a damn nightmare that would not leave her alone. For a while she had forgotten the past and everything that he had planned, but now only his accusations and bad things were coming to her mind, tearing her apart. She did not even know why she was feeling so bad about what he had said when she knew that he had not meant those words that he had said a while ago. But the feeling that was creeping inside her was making her so helpless. Maybe it was because she had suppressed all these feelings for so many years that now they were coming out in form of anger. Tears fell from her eyes and she let them. All these years the love that she had for him was pure, but his betrayal hurt worse than she had thought it will when she says it out loud.
*****
Staring out of the cab Kara saw the lively city passing by. The day looked alive and everything looked so happy. A few weeks ago she was not even thinking of coming back to this city and now she was strolling through the street getting burried under the constant pain caused by the person she had loved the most. The  past month was playing in front of her eyes like it was yesterday. Only a few days had flipped over her whole life. What if she had never returned? But of course, James would have still come after her to pursue her. There is no way he would have left her alone. But what about now? At least he got one thing that he wanted the most, her body, even if not completely. And now that she had told him that she already knew what his plan was and what he wanted to do to her, what will he do to her now?
A sharp pain hit her chest thinking what if he decided to take revenge on her or forced her to be with him? What is she going to do? Moreover, how will she tell Damon's family what was going on and why she did not want to marry Damon? Because in all honesty, she didn't. Fulfilling her mother's dying promise had become a burden on her that was pulling her down like someone grabbing her leg and dragging her under a six feet deep grave. What would people say to Damon's family about the broken alliance? Breaking an engagement of so long was not a small thing after all. And breaking the promise she had made to her mom? Would her mom hate her if she did not follow her words?  And what will Damon think if she told him she did not want to marry him? She loved him. God knew in all honesty how purely she cared about him. But the thought of being intimate with him did not settle well with her heart, even when she tried to force herself to. The thought only brought unsetttling feeling that she could not describe in words.
There were too many questions and she had exhausted herself searching for the answers. She had stayed awake the whole night and now that she was in the cab, her eyelids were getting heavy but knowing she was nearly at her house, she could not take a nap. 
She had not told James about her leaving. Not that she was afraid that he would not let her go. But because she did not really want to face him again. The words he had said to her last night, and everything that had happened was still fresh in her mind and could not face him knowing he had the power to melt her. She knew that he had this effect over her that even she could not break the power of.
But it does not mean that she left him without saying anything. She left a note for him on the kitchen counter and a voicemail on the intercom. She then hired a cab and came out of there. When she had come down in the morning, she did not meet him. He had left a note on the breakfast table saying 'We need to talk. I will not come home tonight. Give me a chance, Kara. Please.'