.19. What the fuck is wrong with me?

Zane sped down the road without thinking of any possibility that a person might cross him. The young man felt how his blood boiled, how his body filled with rage. The thought of Omega choosing the company of a fucking guard over an Alpha-to-be pissed him off even more. She had all chances to become friends with Zane, to see that he wasn't as bad as she thought- and Camilla ignored the opportunity.

Zane parked his car in front of the mansion and nearly jumped out of it, slamming the door shut. His car was one of his most prized possessions, so his mother knew that something must be wrong seeing his behavior.

"Zane, darling, could you please join me for a cup of tea on the balcony?" Luna smiled at her son. The Alpha family had only one child; of course, Luna would do anything to make sure that her son was happy. Even despite his explosive nature and tendency to get into pretty deep trouble from time to time.

"Mother, do I have to? I would rather take a shower and head straight to the bed; today has been pretty eventful. Aside from that- I'm not in the mood for having conversations over a cup of tea."
Zane made sure to sound polite and respectful, trying to hide the rage he actually felt. Just because an Omega and a guard pissed him off, it didn't mean that the young man wanted to leash out on his mother.

"First of all, yes, you do have to. To answer your next question- because I said so. I won't take no for an answer, not this time. Just because you're a somewhat grown man doesn't mean that you have the rights to forget about your mother, Zane. Feel free to take a quick shower if it's that necessary, change into something more comfortable, and in the meantime, I will make some tea for us." Luna turned her back to Zane and headed for the kitchen.

Zane groaned and ran upstairs, silently hoping that his father won't be anywhere near. Alpha could feel any emotions his family members felt, and if he caught on Zane's anger- there would be too many questions. He had enough on his back with his mother demanding some time in privacy already. Tea time with Luna meant only too many questions and possible arguments, which would be caused by irritation.

When the young male got back downstairs, his mother already sat on the balcony, wrapped in a fluffy blanket. She was smiling, watching the bright stars all over the sky. Zane knew that his father most likely already was on the balcony, judging by the smile alone. The blanket was another proof- wolves don't get cold as humans do, but Alpha always wrapped his mate in blankets, making excuses about protecting her.

"Come on, boy, sit down. Stop acting like a damn three there, we all know how damn tall you are. Take the damn cup of tea and tell me what's going on. Don't dare to lie, or I will invite your father to join us." Luna urged Zane to open up. He had always been a difficult child, especially at times when he had to show actual emotion. Now, as time went by- Zane seemed to build up some sort of walls to hide whatever he felt. Luna understood that Alphas were often heartless since they couldn't put their feelings above everything. The pack is a priority; no Alpha would exchange that for emotions. Yet she didn't want to see her son suffer because of his rank in the pack.

"How do you know that there is something wrong with me? What if I have a bad mood, and that's all? You know mom, not everyone can be a damn ray of sunshine," Zane tried to suppress the anger, but even he knew that it was useless. Hiding something from his father was a lot easier than lying to the woman who gave birth to him. Not only was it hard, but Zane would also say it's nearly impossible.

"You don't slam your car doors like you did when you came back home. There were times when I thought that you're attracted to that pile of metal. Zane, you're taking better care of that death machine on wheels than you ever did with your girlfriends. Remember when Rebecca slammed the car door? Your father and I thought that you'd end up going on a rampage, your face was so red, she was terrified. As funny as it was, we found out how much you treasured that car since day one. Your actions seem rather wrong. What's happening, sweetheart?" Luna kept trying her best to prove that her son wouldn't be able to keep a secret for a long time. She raised him- the woman knew nearly everything about her son.

"I don't know, mom, can't get my mind on to it properly. It's like I'm so damn mad, but I have no right to be. Twist it and turn it however you like, but I don't have even the slightest reason to be angry or upset," Zane almost gave up, his eyes finally landing on the cup of tea in front of him. For some reason, he wanted to talk in riddles- hoping that his mother would back off.

"That doesn't make any sense, Zane. Please explain to me what exactly is going on. I'm worried," the look on her face made the young male feel worse than ever. Luna was genuinely sad; even her eyes slowly filled in tears.

"You do remember Camilla, I assume," Zane raised an eyebrow, waiting to see the first reaction Luna would show off. Irritation and disappointment wasn't something he expected to see.

"You did something stupid, didn't you?"

"Why do you always have to assume the worst of it, mom? No, I didn't do anything stupid. I'm tired of repeating how much I fucked everything up and how sorry I am. Can at least you give me a break? I have enough shit on my shoulders already. Please." The soon-to-be Alpha did want to talk to his mother, hoping that she had answers to everything, as always. But he wouldn't sit down and listen to how his mother keeps assuming the worst of it.

"I'm sorry, it's just that.." Luna spoke, almost instantly getting cut off by her son as he stood up.

"I know, alright? No, fuck this, there's no point in talking about anything if you can't let go of those things. I'm out," Zane snarled, turning around in an attempt to leave everything behind.

"No, Zane, wait," Luna grabbed on his wrist, pulling the boy back. For many, Zane seemed like a problematic persona to figure out, but his mother knew what exactly he was about to do. Whenever something angered him to this extent- he spent hours in the gym or trashed his room. None of the possible scenarios seemed any appealing to Luna.

"Mom, I think that none of us is ready for this conversation. Let's just leave it as it is, okay?" He tried to turn the situation around, hopefully, to leave. Sometimes when he said such things, Luna gave up, but to his surprise- she didn't this time.

"No, sit back down and talk. I could ask your father to join us if that's what it takes," the woman didn't have any thought of letting him go. Instead of backing out of the argument, she mind-linked her mate and asked Alpha to join them. There was a slight possibility that Zane needed his father more than his mother right now.

"I just don't understand what the fuck is wrong with me." Zane groaned, sitting back in the chair his mother so kindly took out on the balcony. He covered his face with palms and sighed, silently wondering whether there was any point in speaking about the conflicted feelings he was facing.

"Love, get back inside, it's cold out here," the Alpha appeared behind Zane, smiling at his mate.

As their son grew up- he always looked at his father as if he was a legend. Alpha was like two men in one- ruthless and demanding with the pack, yet loving and caring around his Luna. Zane often envied the unbelievable love between two, hoping that one day he would live through the same feelings. Around his early teens, the young male changed opinion on mates drastically. He got to see how easy most of the women in the pack were to get- needless to say, Zane did take way too many chances as he grew older. His friends often joked about the unbelievable body count and how fast Zane could get the girls. He thought that every other woman would be the same and decided to reject a mate if he has one. Who would want someone's leftovers anyway? But his parents- they were completely different from another period of time. Back in their days, waiting for a mate was the most important thing each wolf did. They didn't sleep around- everything they did was absolutely new for both. Zane assumed that it was the main reason for such unconditional love. Unfortunately, the Alpha-to-be didn't understand that he himself was the same leftover he was trying to avoid so severely.

"Alright, boy, speak," Alpha placed his hand on Zane's shoulder and sat next to him as soon as Luna left. As a father- he could feel how conflicted Zane was.

"Dad, I don't want to talk. Mom keeps forcing me, and it's alright, that's just the way she is. But you? Can we pretend that we had this conversation and part our ways happily? You, the same as I, know that you don't give a shit about what is happening in my life," Zane groaned, looking anywhere but the Alpha.

"I haven't been the best father, I know. But it doesn't mean that I'm not interested in your life or things you worry about. Listen, son; I can see and feel how close over the edge you are, and I do worry. I will hand down the Alpha title to you sooner than you think; by then, you have to get yourself together."

"It's the Omega, alright? And don't start assuming that I did something stupid just like mom did. I didn't do anything," Zane groaned, his jaw clenched as soon as the thought of Camilla crossed his mind.

"I won't, I promise. But do tell me more, what's going on? Did you meet her anywhere while spending time with friends? Or did you find out something? She can't leave yet, you know. The damn council wants to investigate what is the reason for her decision to change packs." Alpha was the one who started feeling irritated at this point.

The council was nothing but pain in his ass, and being such a powerful man, he could quickly kill them all. Getting rid of the problem wasn't anything challenging to do, but the man became so respected just because of his willingness to live by the laws. The Blood Warriors were definitely the strongest pack out there, but their leader was the one who got them there. No pack was as feared yet respected as theirs. Hence, the council members always tried to step on his heels, doing their best to find any mistake. Getting rid of the Alpha meant that the Blood Warriors might finally fall.

"I didn't know that, but I'm not pissed for whatever reasons you obviously are," Zane smiled, trying to lift the tense mood. Both men had their problems, but sometimes getting together was the best thing to do.

"Let's just try to understand everything little by little. Baby steps, son."

"I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me, dad. I hated her a week ago, and today I can't stand seeing her with another male. The guard apparently is her boyfriend. I saw them kissing in the parking lot today, and for some reason, I felt like ripping his throat out. Dad, this is stupid, even my wolf became so damn possessive over her. This isn't just a mere attempt to protect a woman, isn't it?" Zane hid his face in his palms and sighed. He never intended to tell his father anything about what happened, but the fewer details he's giving out- the better for everyone.

"Camilla might have spent a lot of time with your mate, and your wolf might have caught a glimpse of a new scent. A lot of the pack females had to visit her house and stay around while guards were out. Or she might be your mate," Alpha grinned, wiggling his eyebrows. He could only imagine the look on his son's face if she turned out to be the one. Alpha and Luna would feel rather proud of their son getting the Moon Goddess to give him mate so pure as Camilla.

"She's Omega. In order to be mated to an Alpha blood wolf- she has to be at least Delta. Things work how they work, dad. I guess I will see, just hoping that it'll end as soon as possible."

"You'll be alright, son. No matter what- your mother and me, we will always be here for you."

"Maximus, we have to go to the hospital now!" Luna kicked the balcony door open, screaming from the top of her lungs. Her eyes filled with tears, complete terror washing all over her face.