88, Planning the future

Tenac looked at Ayya on the other side of the table. She was beautiful with her hair let loose to dry and a simple white dress. Then, he always found her beautiful. He was a little nervous about what he wanted to talk to her about. They had held the conversation light during dinner. She had told him more stories from growing up in the castle. She had picked those that made both of them laugh. As they finished their food, she looked up at him.

“What was it you wanted to talk about?” she asked. 

“Let’s sit on the couch,” he said and got up and helped her out of her chair. They sat on the couch, facing each other, and Tenac found himself lost for words. He didn’t quite know how to do this. He took a deep breath. “We have talked about marriage and I know that it’s what we both want. But I haven’t officially asked you. Ayya, when we get back home, would you marry me?” he asked. He saw the biggest smile come across Ayya’s face.

“Yes, I would like nothing more,” she said. Tenac drew her in for a kiss. He felt relieved that she hadn’t changed her mind. 

“That was what you wanted to talk about? That’s what got you all tense and fidgety?” she asked as they had caught their breath. 

“Well, no. There is more. What do you think about children?” he asked and felt like he was trying to avoid the actual subject. 

“Children in general, or in a specific setting?” she asked. He could see she was confused. 

“No, I was thinking yours and mine. Is that something you would like?” Ayya smiled at him again.

“It is. I’m not saying I want them right now. But I would love to have a family with you,” she told him. “Do you want children?” she asked. Tenac had to smile. She still hadn’t learnt that he wanted everything that she was prepared to give him. 

“I would love to have children with you,” he said truthfully. 

“Good, it’s something which is hard to compromise about,” she told him and laughed. It was time Tenac stopped beating around the bush and just say what he had been thinking about all day. 

“Ayya, this morning when we visited Jason, I saw how heartbroken you were not to be able to tell him when we could see him next. I know you feel even worse about the fact we can’t continue to keep an eye on him,” he said to her. His change of subject dampened her smile, and she sighed and nodded. 

“Yeah. I don’t know if it’s because I see myself in him. But I have grown attached,” she admitted. 

“It’s understandable, he’s a great kid,” Tenac told her. “Maybe we should learn from the previous generation and think this through before we make a mistake?” he asked. 

“What mistake? I don’t think I follow, Tenac.”

“Both my mother and Kopa have always said they shouldn’t have left you when they went back the first time. Are we making the same mistake? Should we bring Jason back with us?” Tenac asked. Ayya looked at him for so long without saying anything, Tenac got worried. 

“Bring him with us as in offering him a home?” she asked. Her voice was quiet and there was a tremble in it that made Tenac nervous. 

“Yes, I know there will be a little while before we get married, but I think we can find a solution for that time. But I really think he belongs with us. It just feels right, don’t you think?” he asked. Tenac watched as tears formed in Ayya’s eyes and he felt horrible. A soft sob came from her and Tenac was ready to take it all back.

“I do, I feel it too,” she said, and she threw herself around his neck. Tenac didn’t know what to do but to hug her and rub her back. He didn’t know why she was crying, but she didn’t seem sad. 

“Are you okay?” he asked after a moment of silence. She looked up at him, tears still in her eyes, but a big smile on her face.

“Of course I’m not when you are being so amazing and perfect in every way,” she told him and kissed him. “I’m sure my parents will let Jason and me live with them until we get married. But there are a lot of things to consider if we are to do this. I can ask for a bigger apartment in the sanctum, but do we want him to grow up there? Are you sure you want to do this and aren’t doing it just to make me happy? Jason needs to agree. He can say no. How do we handle that? Is it really right to take him out of the city he knows and make him learn all the new things he needs to know?” Ayya kept asking questions. The only way Tenac knew how to stop her was to give her a kiss. As she recovered, he was able to get a word in.

“We will find a house. The boy needs a garden to play in and I’m not stopping at just Jason, we need room for more children. Yes, I want this just as much as you do. And I think we can do it. If Jason doesn’t want to come with us, we have to accept it and we will figure out another way to make sure he is doing good. And the last question you are the best one to answer. You have made the same transition as he will make. We know he has the ability to use magic, as he wasn’t affected by the poison. We can offer him more opportunities to use that ability if he wants to. And I have seen him use a sword. There is talent there,” he told her. 

“You have really thought about this,” Ayya said. Tenac smiled at her.

“I have.”

“But all the orphans have magical abilities,” she said as she processed what he had told her. He smiled at her.

“Sweetheart, I don’t think they will let us adopt twenty-five children. I want a big family, but let’s start with one,” he told her. She laughed, and he enjoyed the sound of it. 

“I think one is more than enough,” she agreed. “We are doing this?” she asked. 

“We are. Where do we start?” he asked. He had no idea how things worked here. 

“I think we start by talking to Sister Loise. We need to make sure we are allowed to adopt him before we give Jason hope. Then we ask Jason. Everything is so new to him right now. We have to make sure not to overwhelm him,” Ayya said. 

“We will take it at his pace,” Tenac reassured her. 

“If he agrees, we need to tell everyone else and start planning for bringing him home,” she said. 

“Then we go to see the sister first thing in the morning. We need to start thinking about going home,” Tenac said and drew her into his arms. 

“I was thinking the same. I have some people I want to say goodbye to and we might need a couple of extra days if Jason is coming with us. But I feel ready to go home. How about you?”

“It will be nice to get back,” he agreed.

“You’re not nervous?” she teased. 

“You mean because I need to sit down with your father and not only explain that I have started seeing his daughter without talking to him, but we are getting married and might have a child as well? No, not at all,” he lied. Ayya laughed and cuddled in closer. 

“Don’t worry, I will be there to protect you. And he, if anyone, will understand why we have brought Jason with us,” she told him. Tenac chuckled and kissed her hair. 

The following morning, they started preparing to leave. They discussed it with Hinat and Firlea and three days seemed like a good time plan. Ayya sent word to the king about their plans and then Tenac took Ayya and headed for the orphanage. He had rarely been this nervous as when they rode through the city. He was relying on the four riders he had brought with them to keep an eye out, as his mind had a hard time focusing. As Ayya asked to speak to Sister Loise, Tenac tried to remember how to breathe. 

“Relax, love. It will be fine,” Ayya said to him as they walked towards the sister’s office. How was she so calm?