Lost Book
Weeks went by, and Hope saw absolutely no sign of Judah. The little cabin continued to come together, so she knew he was working, and by the end of October, Mr. Stewart announced the place was ready to move into. Hope was glad for it, especially since her relationship with the Howards continued to disintegrate, but when she took her few items and hung them in the closet Judah had made for her, she felt more alone than she had in a very long time.
Her father’s letter had some good advice in it, though she wasn’t sure how in the world she could apply it. He’d basically told her what she knew to be true. If she truly thought a person was worth fighting for, then she owed herself a well-fought effort. Anything short of that would leave her an old woman with many unanswered questions.
Despite the good advice, it probably wasn’t worth the risk of going after the correspondence in the middle of the night if the result had been anything other than the conversation she’d had with Judah. And the kiss. But now, it was just another painful memory of a man she couldn’t even see, let alone be with. And with the election looming, it seemed as if Mr. Stewart taking credit for her house had won him a lot of votes; there was a good chance her contract wouldn’t be changing anytime soon.
Maybe it’s for the better that way, she thought to herself one Friday afternoon while the students played outside during lunch. She watched them from the porch, making sure everyone played nicely. That was hardly an issue anymore. They’d all come so far and did such a nice job of treating each other like one big family, even the Pembrokes. Hope had gotten a letter from Mr. Cartwright asking her if she’d consider coming back to Lamar to stay when she came up for her sister’s wedding since Lola could no longer teach, and they were having a hard time finding anyone with the sort of skills Hope had, but Hope had turned him down. For better or worse, this was the path she’d chosen, and she was determined to stick it out for at least the next few years. After that, maybe she’d think about trying to find a man and settling down, though she had a hard time imagining anyone would come along and sweep her off of her feet now that she had an idea what it felt like to be so truly infatuated with someone that he kept her up at night and kept her mind wandering in the middle of the day.
Thinking of Judah brought her eyes over to Ginny. She was still Hope’s best student by far, and Hope was so proud of everything the young girl had accomplished. She was sitting beneath a large maple tree, among the fallen red and orange leaves, reading a book to Sally. Both of them looked enthralled, and it made Hope’s heart happy to see them so enthusiastic about whatever book it was spread on Ginny’s lap. She decided to go over and see what the book was.
The girls were so engrossed they didn’t even notice her until their teacher had sunk down beside them. “What are you reading?”
“Oh, Miss Tucker! You frightened me!” Ginny laughed. “It’s Alice in Wonderland. Have you read it?”
“Yes, I have,” Hope replied, giggling with the girls. “It’s one of my favorites.”
“We’re just at the part where the Mad Hatter is having a tea party,” Sally replied. “Do you think I’ll be able to read it on my own someday?”
“I do,” Hope said with a nod of her head. “And soon. Why don’t you read me a little, Ginny?”
Ginny obliged, reading aloud in her most entertaining voice, even changing the pitch and tone for each character. Hope could see why Sally liked to listen so much, and after a few minutes, there was a crowd of other students sitting around, even some of the boys.
Hope was so caught up in the story, she accidentally let recess go long. When she realized her mistake, she hurried the children inside and got them started on their math, glad it was a Friday afternoon and she could use a long week of hard work as an excuse for a little extra fun. The rest of the day seemed to fly by, and soon enough she’d sent all of the children out for the weekend and went about tidying up the schoolhouse, glad she’d only have a few yards to walk to reach her own residence.
She was sweeping the floor when she noticed Ginny’s book underneath one of the desks. She thought the girl must’ve dropped it. Her eyes immediately went to the window, but of course, their wagon was long gone. There was a chance she might come back for it that evening, but somehow Hope doubted her mother would be willing to come all the way back into town just for a book, even if it was one that Ginny loved. She felt sorry for the girl that she wouldn’t have it to enjoy over the weekend. With a sigh, Hope placed it on the corner of her desk, thinking maybe someone would come and get it during the night.
It was a silly thought, really, and as she sat in a comfortable chair she’d bought herself, looking out the window at the schoolhouse until late into the night, pretending to be embroidering but really keeping an eye out in case Ginny told her uncle of her lost book, and he decided to come and get it, Hope felt foolish. It was half past midnight before she got her wits about her and hauled herself off to bed, thinking about how desperate and ridiculous she would’ve seemed if there were anyone else in the world who knew what she’d been doing. For once in her life, having no one else around seemed to have paid off, however, and as she pressed herself to sleep, she determined being utterly alone wasn’t always as horrendous as others made it out to be.