Night
After Mr. Ward read the telegraph from his cousin, Cordia’s father tried to get her to go home, but she insisted on staying. She watched as Mr. Ward locked up the courthouse at 8:15. She watched as the crowd dispersed. She even watched as Julia rode away around 9:00. Finally, her father talked enough reason into her to get her to walk back home. She knew she wouldn’t sleep that night and that she would probably be one of the first people at the courthouse the next morning. If it had been up to her, she would have spent the night sleeping underneath that oak tree.
As soon as there was enough light to see the brick sidewalk, Cordia was out the door, flying to the town square. As she approached the courthouse, she saw just a few other people standing outside. There was nothing new posted on the door. Her shoulders slumped as she went back to the same spot where she had spent the better portion of the day before, underneath the oak tree. She hadn’t figured on there being any news. As a matter-of-fact, she could tell that Mr. Ward hadn’t even made it to the building yet. Still, a part of her had hoped to have some sort of relief from this awful wondering.
The majority of her night had consisted of tossing and turning, flailing about on her bed. She had spent hours on her knees, praying to God that neither Jaris nor Will had been injured, and if they had been injured, that He wouldn’t let them be dead or suffering and dying. Her mind had envisioned so many different scenarios. She imagined them reeling on the battlefield, still lying there after nightfall. She envisioned herself reading that list on the courthouse door, falling over in a faint. Finally, she wore herself out enough to fall asleep. But it was the most restless sleep she had ever had. When she did dream, it was a haunted dream. She could see Jaris, and then Will, lying dead in a pile of mud, blood running from their cold bodies. In her dream, she just had a feeling that they had shot and killed each other. She hadn’t seen it, but she had gathered it, just from the way they were lying. Then, in another version of the dream, it was she who had shot them both.
Jarred awake from the images, she was relieved to see that the sun had risen above the horizon. And now, here she sat, waiting. Hoping and praying that none of her awful dreams had played out and that both of the men she loved were somewhere off in camp now, reading letters from home and talking about the battle with their friends.
She didn’t have any idea what time it was until the church bells on the First Baptist Church, just a block away, began to ring. Only five o’clock? She realized she was probably going to be sitting there for a few hours before Mr. Ward even showed up to unlock the doors. Most folks who worked at the courthouse didn’t arrive until at least 7:00 or 8:00. She was hoping he would be a little hastier today, what with so many people waiting. But he had seemed pretty sure yesterday that they were not going to be finding anything out that day.
Around 6:30, Cal Markson, a boy of about fifteen or so, showed up on a horse. “I’m riding toward Springfield,” he announced. “Surely there has got to be word in the Springfield paper or someone who can tell me something.”
“Be careful!” one of the old-timers standing around warned. “You don’t want to be made a casualty yourself, boy. You know them scouts is liable to shoot anything that moves.”
Cal looked determined. “My older brother fights with Price. I’m going to go see what I can. I mean to be back before the sun comes up tomorrow.” He rode off with such fury his horse’s hooves kicked up dirt along the road that lined the square, and then all they could see was a trail of dust in his wake.
Though Cordia was concerned for Cal, being such a young boy, she was glad to know that someone was going to do something proactive to find out some information. She couldn’t believe that Julia wasn’t here yet. Wasn’t she concerned about her brother? Of course, Cordia knew she was being a little hard on the young girl--in fact, Julia was probably thinking that it wouldn’t make much sense to go sit and stare at a locked courthouse. Still, she needed something to be angry about, and right now, anything would do.
It seemed like an eternity before Mr. Ward finally arrived around 7:30. There was now a crowd of about forty people who all gave a big cheer when his horse and wagon came into view. “I declare,” he said, as he fumbled with the keys to the building, “I do hope there’s some kind of news come soon, or else I don’t know what you early-risers might do to me.”
Again, Cordia was aggravated. It was easy for the old man to have such a nonchalant attitude. He didn’t have any relations in the war as far as she knew. “Still, you’d think he’d have a little compassion for all the boys he knew who may well be dead.” Once again, Cordia was glad she was keeping her opinions to herself. It seemed every thought she had was unwarranted. She knew it was just this awful uncertainty that was eating away at her. She made a mental note to be careful, if ever she did open her mouth, as she may likely bite some innocent person’s head off.
At a little after 8:00, Cordia’s dad stopped by to check in with her on his way to the bank. “No, Daddy,” she said aggravated. “We’ve not heard a word. Mr. Ward’s in there, but I guess there must not be any news because he hasn’t bothered to come out and tell us.”
“Calm down, sweetheart,” he assured her. “I am sure that everything is fine and that you are getting all worked up about nothing.”
Cordia felt her face turn a little red. How she hoped he was right. “I’m sorry, Daddy. I just have this awful feeling.”
He put his arm around her. “I know, child. You have always been sensitive to the ideas of the suffering of others, or of losing those people that you love. But it will all work out in God’s way, my dear.” She had thought on that a lot. God’s way. She supposed he must be right, and again she nodded in agreement with her father’s wisdom. “I know that a normal person would be all worked up, wondering what had happened, but you, my child, the most inquisitive person I have ever laid eyes on, well, this must truly be eating you up. Why don’t you go back to the house and rest, and I will come over and check every so often to see if they have any news?”
“No, Daddy,” she said very adamantly. “I need to stay here and find out for myself.”
Having known Cordia for all twenty years of her life, her daddy knew there was no sense in arguing with her. He kissed her lightly on the forehead and then was on his way.
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