Chapter 34 - You should’ve died

HADRIAN

I walk the same halls as I did earlier today. I wear the same black hoodie and jeans, but this time, my hands are covered in leather gloves. The words of Emma linger in my mind. *What was the reason for the rogue to attack?*

The smell of silver is combined with blood. A lot of blood. The scent of silver and iron makes my stomach roil and my heartbeat picks up. Nero is on his guard. Every cell of our body is on edge and analyzing the area for a threat.

The guards are easily avoided and I find myself back at the cell of the rogue. The man is hunched over and lying in a pool of his own blood. His back is exposed and bare. The whips have torn open his skin. There is barely any life left in the man. His heartbeat is struggling and his breathing is off.

*“He’s dying.”* Nero says.

I use the key that I took from the guards’ office. They don’t know about the hidden tunnels and they don’t know they should guard them.

I’m careful not to accidentally touch the silver bars with my body as I move into the cell. The rogue doesn’t move. I crouch down and watch out for any movement in case the rogue plans to attack. He won’t be able to surprise me again. I'm in tune with Nero now.

“You came back.” The man says. His voice is barely audible.

“Who are you?”

“My name…” His breath is labored as he talks. Like every word takes him the little energy he has left. “is Alpha Amadeus.”

*Alpha Amadeus?* The name is familiar. He is the leader of the Snow Moon pack. One of the biggest in the kingdom. “You’re not a rogue.”

Alpha Amadeus shakes his head from left to right in a singular, slow movement. Alpha Amadeus has led the Snow Moon pack for almost as long as the kingdom exists. He knows the rules. I frown. He received a hundred silver whips for attacking a member of the royal family. He should have known better. “Why would you attack me?”

He takes two breaths. “Because I knew it was you.” He rises from the floor. His hands hold himself with shaking limbs and he looks me in the eye.

“Why did you do it?”

The man barely keeps up his head. “I have to find my daughter.” His arms give up and I catch him before he falls. Blood seeps into my clothes and covers my hands. The man needs a healer, but no healer will treat him now. He is deemed a traitor and helping a traitor is punished by silver whips. This man willingly accepted his death, but for what?

“Only the King knows where she can be.” He whispers.

I furrow my brows. “Why would my father know?”

His eyes have fear in them. “The King knows.” Alpha Amadeus grips my hoodie with his hand “My mate is dead. My daughter is all I have left.”

I want to ask him what he’s talking about. What he means with ‘The King knows’. But the man is lost in another world. A world of memories and pain. His eyes are frantic. “I called out to the King so many times.” He mumbles on repeat.

Blood trickles down his lips and the grip on my hoodie tightens momentarily. “Please, Prince Hadrian. Help me find her.”

I feel a pang in my chest. I cannot save him. His hand loosens finger for finger. Helping him is the least I can do. “What is her name?”

There is a small smile on his face. His eyes light up for a moment. “Graciella.”

The love for his daughter is evident and I wonder what that would be like. My imagination immediately jumps to Emma with a big round belly, our pup safe and sound inside. Me, being overprotective with everything she does and carrying her around when her feet are sore. I blink away the impossible dream.

“I will find her and bring her home,” I promise to the man.

“Thank you, Prince Hadrian.” He says as the last strength leaves his body and his soul is returned to the moon goddess.

————

There is a hollow feeling in my chest like life has been sucked out of me and left an emptiness of ragged, torn-open flesh. My bloody clothes as evidence that it happened. Only the blood isn’t mine.

I open the door of my bedroom and the bed is empty. The bed sheets are still perfectly made up. I know she’s in the room because her scent slowly, but surely stitches the gaping hole in my torso back together, cel for cel. I take a deep inhale and turn to the sofa where it radiates from.

Emma is sleeping on the sofa. There are goosebumps on her skin and she shivers in her sleep. Why would she not sleep on the bed, under the blanket?

*“Is it cold here?”*

Nero seems at a loss as well. *“Maybe it’s a human thing?”*

Emma wakes, she opens her eyes and gasps. With wide eyes, she sits up and covers a hand over her heart. “You scared me.”

I guess I have been standing here, watching her sleep while I’m covered in blood. That couldn’t be more disturbing if I tried.

“You’re bleeding.”

Blood drops trickle down my hands and fall on the floor. I grit my teeth. “It’s not mine.”

“Are you okay?”

“I'm going to shower.” I lock myself up in the bathroom and take a deep breath. I discard the hoodie and jeans and let the water fall down my body. I don’t wait for the water to heat up and the cold water shocks me. The water turns red and I watch it disappear down the drain until the water is clear again.

When I step out of the bathroom, Emma is on her knees hunched over and scrubbing away the blood stains on the floor. The sight of her on her knees should make me horny as hell, but instead, anger washes through me. “What are you doing?”

She doesn’t turn to look at me but keeps her eyes on the floor. “White vinegar and salt are good for cleaning blood stains, so I got some from the kitchen and—“

I pull her up from the floor by her arms and indulge in her closeness for a second. Her scent and heat ignite in my body from her touch. For a second she is mine. “My mate shouldn’t be cleaning. Especially not the mess I made.” I whisper and my voice is rough and deep with desire.

Her heartbeat picks up speed and her body flushes warm. I imagine trailing my fingers over her soft, flushed skin. I imagine kissing her until she’s burning with desire. The mate bond is affecting us again and I let her go. I put space between us to calm down my excited body. I fill a tumbler of whiskey and let the burn flow through me.

“What happened?”

Emma knew I went to the dungeons. She encouraged me to go. I never talk about my thoughts with anyone, except for Nero, but I told her.

“He’s dead.” I take a deep long swig of the amber liquid, hoping it will burn away the memories. “He was searching for his daughter and now he’ll never find her.”

I set the tumbler down harder than I intended. The clattering of glass on black mahogany bursts through the room. “I could’ve prevented this.”

“He attacked you. You nearly died yourself.”

“I should’ve seen the attack coming. I was weak.”

Her posture changes as her hands ball in fists and she watches me with narrowed eyes. She swings her arms in the air. “Are you kidding me? If you are weak, what does that make me?”

She points a finger in my chest. “You should’ve died. I still don’t understand why you aren’t dead right now. How can you call yourself weak? You tore out a door!” She’s aggravated and her voice rises with every word.

I watch her with wide eyes. I didn’t expect so much temperament from her right now and it makes my dick rock hard. *Damn.* Is it sadistic if I like it when she yells at me? I want to pin her to the wall and show her what she does to me.

I inhale through my nose and turn away from her to look out of the window. I can still see her in the reflection of the glass. “I promised him I would find his daughter.”

She crosses her arms. “Good. I’m going to help you.”

I turn around to see her face. “What?”

“Please, don’t question me. I’m already doing that enough by myself.” She closes her eyes and she furrows her brows. “I want us to be friends, Hadrian.”

The word friend leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. “You’re my mate.”

She rolls her eyes and doesn’t see the agitation in my face. “Forced mate. Obviously. Neither of us wants this, but we should try to work together.”

Something tears open the tissue of my heart.

*I* want this. *I* want her.