18. I Am Fine

Hades kissed my mouth gently, like he was sad for me. My body was completely healed, but I knew my mind would forever be changed. I didn’t know how long I had been locked in my mother’s cage. Hades said we would talk over a meal. I was desperate for food and something to drink. We were at the enormous table. Cerberus stayed by my side as we walked through the Palace.

“Hades is Cerberus going to always be by my side?” Not that I minded. I liked this monster. “I don’t know, when I brought you here, he wouldn’t stop trying to get in the palace. I kept him out, but he wouldn’t stop winning until I let him in. He went straight to you the second I opened the door. The three headed dog was massive. It was lucky for him that the palace was massive, and the doors frames were wide enough for him to walk through.

I looked at Hades, he looked different. His appearance was a bit disheveled. His beard looked longer than when I saw him last. I could see he was trying to hold it together, but he had been through it, that was obvious. The table was bare, and Hades yelled, and food was shuffled in. There were twenty bottles of sparkling juice set down for me. I had no idea how long it had been since I ate. I knew I didn’t need it but even gods liked food. “Go on Persephone Darling, eat.” Hades said, I could sense sadness in his voice.

“Are you going to fill me in now?” I asked between bites. “Once you finish eating.” So, I ate, I had never eaten so much in one sitting. I loved the taste. I had sucked down bottle after bottle of sparkling juice. When I was done, I looked at the god of the dead. “Okay what do you remember.” Hades asked me. “I remember my mother throwing me in the cage. She took the necklace you gave me, then she said she was going to help Zeus and have him break our deal. Then there was darkness. I remember using my gift a lot, and thorns, though I don’t know what that is about?” I responded.

Hades nodded. “You were gone for a long time.” I quirked my eyebrow. “How long?” He looked nervous. “Please tell me.” He let out a breath. “Ten years.” I stared at him. That couldn’t have been true. “No, I couldn’t have been that long.” I spoke. “Persephone, it was, and then I finally found you and brought you back, you have been asleep for about two months. Your mind and body needed to heal.”

That couldn’t have been true. My mother would not have left me for a decade and not visiting once. I knew she said it could have been a century, but I expected her to at least check in on me. I didn’t think she would stay away from me for so long. She had been enraged, that was true, but she should have at least come to see me. What had I missed in the decade I was gone? Was my mother still helping Zues? What was that even about. What about the meeting I was supposed to attend with Hades, the person he wanted me to meet.

“I am sorry; I didn’t find you sooner. I tried; I reached out in your dreams, but you had no idea where you were. Hecate couldn’t track you either. Cerberus couldn’t even sniff you out. I asked Hermes to help look, but he couldn’t find you either. Demeter made sure you were secure, and it was almost impossible to find you.” I looked at him, he looked like he was about to cry. I reached my hand out to touch his. “You did find me though.” I said calmly. I paused, “But Hades how did you find me if it was so hard?”

This is when he looked even more uncomfortable. “Hades?” I spoke. “I went to the fates.” I kept my hand on his. I knew the fates where not beings you went to. If you asked for something, or for knowledge they demanded something in return, and it was always a high price. Most gods didn’t even approach them to find out about themselves or what their future was. But they were all knowing. “Hades what did you give them?”

“I gave them my ability to father children.” Hades released my hand to cover his face. He would never have children He had given up his future to find me. I leaned over and removed his hands from his face. “Hades you didn’t have to do that. I would have been fine.” Hades looked sad beyond belief. “Persephone, I had to find you, I had been so careless. I should have found you on my own instead of going to them. I understand if you want to leave now, I can’t give you what most gods want. But it was worth it. You were not made to be caged.”

I leaned back, did he really think I still wouldn’t choose him? I didn’t understand that. He had just told me he had given up fathering children for me. That was a major thing for us gods. Only a few of them didn’t have children. He had given that up for me. Why would he think I would abandon him now. If he hadn’t, I could very well be in my mother's cage still. “Hades, I won’t leave you, I want to be here, children or no.”

He looked at me like I was crazy, I was sure I was a little bit. I could feel my mind felt jumbled. “Persephone Darling, you may mean that now, but you will come to resent me.” I shook my head. I got up and crawled into his lap. Grabbing his face with my tiny hands. “Hades, I will not leave you, I will not resent you. We don’t need children. We have plenty in the Underworld. We have Cerberus.” The three headed dog lifted his heads from the stone floor he was laying on.

“I don’t need little gods running around me to make me happy.” Hades looked so serious and said as I ran my hands through his hair, pushing it back, it had fallen into his face. “You will hate me eventually, everyone eventually does.” I shoved away from him. He wasn’t hearing me. And began to walk away. “I am sorry.” He said quietly. I stopped walking and turned to face him.

“Of all the others, I trusted you to listen to me. You won’t though will you? You act like I am a child, like my mother does. You are treating me like she did. Not listening to me, not letting me decide what I want. Deciding you know what is best for me. If you were not going to listen to what I feel and want, you should have left me in the cage to rot. I told my mother I loved you, that you loved me. But you don’t do you? A guess my mother was right, she said I would learn, and I guess I just did. It only took a decade. Fuck you, Hades.” I shouted.

Hades stood facing me. “How can say that. I sacrificed to get you out of that fucking cage.” My blood was pumping hard. I was angry. How dare he throw that at me. My body felt out of my control as sharp thorns jutted up from the floor, nearly piercing through the King of the Underworld. “You asshole, I love you and you don’t even care. All you are doing is pitying yourself. It is you who seems to have a problem with what you did, because I don’t care about it. I was just glad to be with you. But it isn’t enough, is it?” I yelled. Another massive thorn shot up.

I didn’t know if that was me. Had I done that? I looked down at my hands trying to figure out when my power became that strong. When I looked up Hades had closed the distance between us. Now, he stood in front of me. “You don’t get to tell me I don’t love you.” I went to smack him across the face, but Hades grabbed my wrist. But instead of telling me something. His lips crashed into mine. I didn’t respond at first. I was so shocked.

Hades pulled away from me, thinking I didn’t want to kiss him. He stood there looking at me, crestfallen. I grabbed him and pulled him to me, smashed my mouth against his. He grabbed me tightly, fisting his hand into my hair, and I felt him growl. I was grabbing him, I burned for him, did he not see that? Could he not feel it. He hoisted me up, so I had my legs wrapped around him. He moved me to the wooden table laying my back against it. His mouth went to my neck, and he kissed me hard there.

His massive hands moved down, and I felt my shirt rip open. His mouth descended to my breasts. Next my pants were ripped off and he settled between my legs. “I missed this.” he said as he devoured me with his hot mouth. When I reached my peak long vines shot from my arms that were extended behind me. He moved back up kissing me so I could taste myself on his mouth.

Against my lips he said. “I am sorry, I will listen to you. If you say you can handle this then I trust you to know your mind.” That is all I wanted, to be treated as an equal, that I knew myself. That I didn’t need anyone to make decisions for me. Hades could no longer hold himself back and pulled his pants down and shoved inside me. I moaned loudly. He took me hard on the table breaking it beneath us. My vines and thorns covered the room, Cerberus, Hades, and myself were spared from my thorny vines.