Chapter 12

The glitz and glamor of it all, as beautiful and mesmerizing as it was, gave me a headache. Too many photographers, music too loud and it was too cold. It smelled like paint and smoke. Artificial. The jewelry glinted into my eyes, and the whispers tickled my ears and made it unbearable to even be there.
I’d made a mistake. Fashion shows were absolutely not for me.
I felt Jenna’s hand on mine, gentle and concerned. I looked at her and she nodded in understanding, turning to whisper to Aubrey and taking me away to the bathroom. I followed her without hesitation and looked in the mirror, a little shocked. My neck and cheeks were flushed, making my freckles pop.
“Are you feeling okay?”
“I don’t know.” I laughed and shook my head. “Guess I’m not a fan of crowded spaces.”
“It was noisy, too,” she agreed with a solemn nod. I splashed some cold water on my face, hoping my mascara wouldn’t run down even though it was waterproof. I’d kept makeup on me anyway but didn’t want to take the time to fix it because I felt so drained.
I breathed deeply as I patted my face dry with a towel. Jenna stared down at her shoes as she leaned back against the wall. She seemed expectant, as if she were grasping at the right words to say.
“You know,” she began, “I heard you’re very convincing as a matchmaker. You talk to parents well.”
“I’ve heard that, too, but I can’t speak for myself.”
“What if I wanted to hire you?”
I looked at her and she seemed nervous. Extremely nervous. I turned around and rested my hip against the edge of the sink, crossing my arms. “Well, I don’t come cheap, obviously.”
“I don’t mind.” She chuckled. “I just need someone reputable to at least try something for me. I can’t tell you yet, but I’ve heard you’re good at special requests.”
“If it was Aubrey that told you anything—”
“Austin Santiago.”
I froze as my mind flashed back to the men I saw sitting in the bar, the day Aubrey told me about her suspicions of Fernando cheating on her.
“Oh…” I trailed off, sitting on the sink and gripping the edge tightly. “I’ll admit, that case was a bit of a nightmare. You’re lucky we’re in a more tolerant time. But I can’t guarantee anything, you know? Each clients’ circumstances are different.”
“I’m biding my time,” she said in an understanding tone. “I’ll call you when I’m more financially independent from my family.”
“I’ll do what I can.”
It wasn’t long before we found ourselves outside. We walked around carefree, and I was already feeling much better. It wasn’t any less crowded outside but there was space to move. Jenna and I got along great, and I felt young again. I wished I’d tried making more friends when I was younger, although there was only a four-year difference between us.
I was a little tipsy, feeling the laughter bubble up in my throat with the obscure jokes and observations we were throwing at each other. Things started to speed up and it all happened so fast. In a single second, Jenna had disappeared. I could still feel the warmth of her hand on my bicep, but she was nowhere to be seen. I could hear her somewhere in the wind, but the crowd pulled me away. I thought it would be better to follow her voice and cross the road to wait on the pavement until the traffic cleared up and I could look for her.
When the light turned green, cars sped onto the road and I couldn’t see to the other side where I hoped Jenna would be standing. When the light turned red, she wasn’t there.
I reached into my purse and panicked at the low battery. My phone could die any second now.
Just my luck, I groaned internally and tossed it back inside. I need to find her.
My feet carried me wherever they could, retracing our steps onto all the streets and the stores. As the night grew darker, the crowd started to thin out, leaving only small groups and individual people rushing to get home.
I needed to return to the hotel, but not without Jenna and the girls.
Turning helplessly into a dimly lit alleyway, I froze.
How did I get here?
My breath came out in small puffs of white, and beads of sweat formed on my forehead as I realized I didn’t recognize where I was at all. I’d been roaming around mindlessly the entire time, and now I was lost.
Clanging. Metal against metal. Repeated, slow, and…almost mocking.
Someone laughed in the darkness. Wait, not one, but a few. There were more. Deep voices aimed right at me.
I was standing under a single lightbulb. My heart was thudding so loud in my chest that it felt as if they could hear it. I needed it to calm down.
“Hey, you…” a guy slurred in a thick accent as he stumbled out of the darkness toward me. “You’re lost, ha? We help.”
I remained quiet and slowly moved back toward the darkness. I knew if I ran around the corner, I’d find a shop to hide inside.
“It is okay,” another slurred.
No, it’s not, I thought in alarm as another man came out of the darkness. Now there were three of them. I needed to run.
Without a second thought, I turned around and sprinted. Their laughter followed me, as if they’d lassoed their voices onto my ankles. I could hear them stumbling and running behind me trying to catch up in their drunken haze. I just knew they could hear the blood rushing in my ears like I could. They were following it.
My heart was in my throat. I would either die tonight, or worse…
“Lilith!” I heard someone call out in the distance. Another man but…familiar.
Oh, my God…
“Lilith!”
“I’m here!”
His hurried footsteps on the asphalt sounded closer to me than the ones behind me, and he came into view. The neon sign of the shop next to him fell onto his figure like a halo that called out to me. “Lilith!”
He opened his arms as my legs pumped harder trying to outrun the shadows. I fell into him just centimeters out of the alley’s ominous darkness that would’ve swallowed me whole. The harsh cold of the wind was replaced with a warmth so comforting, I could’ve melted.
“Jenna was so worried,” he said in a rushed panic and grabbed me by the shoulders to look at me. My breath caught in my lungs as he examined me with his eyes holding a literal storm in them. “Are you okay? What were you running from?”
“Yah!” the drunken men yelled from behind me, and Cristo pulled me away to shield me behind himself.
“Mwol balae?” he snapped at them. I had no idea what that meant.
The men laughed, saying something mockingly in Korean, to which Cristo snapped back. Whatever he said must’ve been serious because the guys backed off.
“Come on,” he said, voice doing a one-eighty and becoming absolutely gentle.
I was stunned…
We headed to the main road where he’d parked an obviously rented car. There were other cars honking impatiently and he yelled at them apologetically while opening the passenger door for me. I slid inside shakily. He soon entered the driver’s side and drove off immediately.
The ride was silent. All the way to the resort. I couldn’t speak as we entered the elevator. My legs were trembling like jelly and I did my best to hold myself up. As soon as we reached our floor, I mindlessly walked off toward my suite. He followed inconspicuously. I could tell he was trying to respect my space and keep a comfortable distance.
I unlocked the door and walked in, holding it open. He studied me carefully as I kept my head down, but walked in. He found the couch across the bed and sat down awkwardly. I closed the door and locked it, heading toward my bed to sit down.
“What are you doing here?” My voice was softer than I meant it to be as I wrung my fingers. I hated it. It didn’t sound strong, or confident, or annoyed. Just…broken and tired.
“An international architecture expo that I’m a part of,” he explained. “Jenna called as soon as you disappeared. Your phone was dead.”
“Yeah,” I whispered.
“Lilith,” he began gently and leaned forward, “did they do anything? Did they touch you?”
I shook my head, not trusting myself to speak over the bile rising in my throat, as I prepared for him to berate me about being out so late on my own and getting lost as if it was my fault. And truth be told, it was.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that.” His voice became even softer. “I…I can’t imagine how scared you must’ve been.”
I was having flashback memories. So many memories. Especially of the night I had to interview Cristo six years ago. And I realized, that so far, he was the only man I knew who had protected me. But I was waiting for the blade to drop and cut through the sense of security my mind tried to feel when I was around him. The tears sprang into my eyes, and I bit my lip hard to hold them at bay.
“I’m sorry for worrying you guys,” I whispered.
“Of course we’d be worried,” he explained. “We care about you”
“I should’ve been more careful.”
He sighed and got up, pulling the vanity stool over to sit closer to me.
“Lilith, you can’t ever be careful enough.”
“It could’ve been avoided if—”
“Nooo, listen to me.” His voice grew stern and he pulled my hands gently into his. “I don’t know exactly what to say in this situation because I’m not a woman, but all I know is that when a piece of shit wants to hurt you, nothing you do will stop him. It’s not up to you to take responsibility for their bullshit.”
I broke down, sobbing and shaking uncontrollably. It was too much. I felt too much. There was so much pain in my chest, weighing on my heart like a rock.
He held onto my hands tighter and softly reassured me, “It wasn’t your fault.”
The rock lifted, and hot, intense tears of rage and humiliation that I’d forgotten I had, began pooling out of my eyes, nose, and mouth. I was ugly crying, short of breath, and at my absolute weakest. Cristo reached out for the box of tissues on the bedside table and handed them to me.
“Can I stay with you, please?” His voice was almost a whisper. “Do you need me to hold you?”
I nodded. I needed the warmth I felt just like when he’d found me. I needed it so much that I couldn’t make sense of anything else. He didn’t hesitate to come over and sit next to me and brought me into his arms. I buried myself into his chest as he held onto me securely. It wasn’t a half-assed hug, but a real one. He wasn’t holding back; he knew I needed comfort.
I’d probably ruined his shirt, but his hand rubbing my back and shoulders showed he didn’t mind. He kept asking small questions, like if I needed water, or if I wanted him to turn the heater on, or should he run me a warm bath. I would nod and shake my head in response, only focused on how his presence engulfed me and made me forget how unsafe I’d felt just a little while ago.
It was a while until I started to quiet down, slowly slipping from soft sobs to little sniffles. I had calmed down considerably when he reached over for the bottle on the bedside table and opened it for me, never letting go of me completely.
“You need to wash up and change into something comfortable.” His voice was low as he handed me the bottle. “Do you need me to stay until you’re asleep?”
I nodded, still feeling too weak to speak. He helped me stand up, saying something about unpacking my suitcase for me. I wordlessly went to the bathroom to take care of myself. Ten minutes later, I saw my comfy silk pajamas laid out for me. The same ones reserved for a good cry.
“I gotta use the bathroom for a bit. You should change.”
“There are extra toothbrushes in the cabinet if you need one.”
He locked the bathroom and I changed into my pajamas quickly, getting into the warm bed and under the covers. It was soft, and I cocooned myself into it snugly and quickly drifted off to sleep.