Don't tell me you've already lost it!

When she reached home the next evening, she found a bouquet of red roses on her bed. She smiled in surprise as she reached for it, imagining Vansh to be the sender. She closed her eyes and inhaled the sweet perfume of rose.

Through the open window in her room, Vansh climbed in. She watched him enter, an eager smile on her face and when he stood in front of her, in all his masculine glory, she realized just how acutely she had missed him the past two days.

She wrapped her arms around his torso and hugged him with a jump. His arms returned the favour when they wrapped around her slender waist and pulled her tight against him. She could hear his heart beating in her ears and her heart copied his rhythm. Her heart answered his beat with hers and only then did she feel home.

“I missed you”, he said as he placed a soft kiss on the top of her head.

“I missed you too”, she replied and pushed her head away from his chest to look into his eyes. His eyes were beautiful, a mixture of grey and blue but now as they shined with love and adoration for her, it was more beautiful than ever.

It had been 47 hours since they last saw each other. Vansh had to leave for a meeting in Bangalore and the last time she met him was when he came to inform her of the same.

In the grand scheme of things, 47 hours is not a huge deal but she missed him tremendously. They called but it just didn’t feel the same. She missed being held in his arms, she missed inhaling his scent and smiling as she nuzzled her nose in his neck. She missed cuddling after their animal-like love session. She missed feeling him thrust inside her. She missed the feeling of being full.

It was almost like having withdrawal symptoms, but not quite. She worried she was being extremely co-dependent but only then did she realise, it was probably just a phase. The honeymoon phase, as they like to call it.

Though she loved all the emotions he incited in her, it was bothersome when he wasn’t near. She liked to believe she was an independent person, however little she proved it, but co-dependency was not something she wanted in her life.

She loved him, but she wanted to love her as well. And that is the only reason that prevented her from calling him every other hour.

She smiled against his chest when his hands started roaming up and down her frame, guessing his intention. She could feel the proof of his arousal hardening against her belly and her own arousal seemed to inspire from it.

As he brought her mouth to his, her hands travelled to the nape of his neck and her lips parted to welcome his assault. The taste of him exploded in her mouth and she moaned in delight. He kissed her feverishly, forcefully but gentle. He wasn’t eating her mouth, and yet she felt devoured.

Her arousal seemed to spike as his hands rested under her buttocks and the kiss seemed to deepen. He leaned over her as she stood on her tip-toes. She moaned into his mouth as their tongues battled.

His hands roamed all over her body and lips started moving downwards. He sucked on the sweet spot of her throat as she moaned his name. With her eyes closed, she only felt – his hands, his lips, his tongue, his scent, his groans and her mother’s voice.

Her eyes snapped open.

She staggered away from him when she saw her mother standing right in front of her. Her heart that was beating rapidly before, now ran faster for a different reason altogether. Her adrenaline spiked as she met her mother’s glare with a dumb and guilty expression on her face.

“What the hell is this, Shreya?”, shouted her mother, moving towards her to pull her away from him.

Vansh stood silent in shock; he didn’t know what to do, much like Shreya. She cast her downwards and stood silently, unable to speak a word.

“Look at me”, said her mother, her voice filled with volcanic rage. Shreya knew it was about time they’d have to the eruption of rage from her mother, but she wanted to stall as long as she could.

She looked up and met her mother’s eyes; there was no trace of love to be found in her grey eyes – only anger, disappointment and betrayal.

“I… I… I’m sorry, mom”, she stammered, with her heart in her throat. It was beating so fast, she was sure she had reduced her lifeline of her heart by at least a year.

“Vansh, get out of here”, ordered Mrs. Sharma and though she wanted to plead her mother to let him stay, she didn’t want to cause another big ruckus. So she stayed silent and watched as Vansh left her room, this time from the door.

He cast a last glance towards her but she couldn’t meet his eyes. Her neck was bent low and her eyes downcast. She bit her lips as she tried to control the tears back, she didn’t want to cry so soon, she wanted to talk to her mother, try making her understand.

“What is the meaning of this, Shreya? Answer me. I seem to recall, you were using your lips quite well just moments ago. Use them now, and tell me what the meaning of this is. Is this how you repay me after the freedom I’ve given you? Is this how you repay me for all the years I’ve spent into shaping you? By going behind my back and insulting my parenting skills by snogging this.. this man? In my own house?”, her voice increasing by the end of it. The disapproval, the disappointment, the hatred was clear in her voice.

She didn’t like what her daughter was doing and she was making it clear. A tear rolled down Shreya’s cheek. She couldn’t face being at the receiving end of her mother’s wrath, the mother she loved so much. She couldn’t the disappointed look on her face and so she kept looking at her feet and said nothing.

She had never seen her mother this angry or disappointed; her mother never resorted to screaming. She always told her what was wrong and what was right, never shouted. Her mother had always understood her and it hurt that now, she didn’t; Shreya had broken her trust.

She heard the sharp intake of her mother and looked up slightly. Mrs. Sharma walked towards the end of the bed and asked her take a seat as well.

Shreya meekly took a seat next to her, not daring to meet her mother’s eyes.

“Why?”, asked her mother and the voice sounded so lost, hurt and sad that all she wanted to do was comfort her and lift her spirits. Instead she settled for looking in her mother’s eyes, confused and silent.

“Why? Why did you do this? What was wrong with my parenting?”, asked her mother, her voice breaking at the end. It might seem like she was overreacting but with the way this city was, narrow-minded and backwards – dating someone was a taint over the family; and if they ever found that she had lost her virginity before marriage, it would mean a slap to the whole family.

Some parts of this city were okay with dating – like Vansh’s father, but that was minority. From her mom, grandfather to the last of her relatives, every one believed in arrange marriage and dating was considered a lack of morals on the girl’s end.

“NO! No mom! I’m sorry! I’m so so sorry”, sobbed Shreya.

“When had charges on you because of this guy, I didn’t tell you anything. I didn’t tell your dad about it because I trusted you to know what was good for yourself. You promised you wouldn’t talk to him after that case. Why would you break my trust, Shreya? Was trusting you a fault of mine?”

Her eyes watered as she saw the hurt in her mother’s eyes.

“I.. I didn’t mean to, mom. I love him, I really do and I couldn’t think straight. I’m so sorry”

“You can’t control who you love but you do control how you act, don’t you? Then why was he here, in my home, snogging your mouth? Is this what I taught you? Do you want to lose your virginity before marriage?”

Shreya couldn’t help the guilty and shame-faced expression that covered her face. When her mother saw it, she stood up as she cried in a high pitch, “Don’t tell me you have already lost it”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry”, begged Shreya, all the words from her vocabulary had comprised into these two. She couldn’t say anything except sorry, she didn’t know what.

Kanya collapsed onto the bed.