Chapter 13

KATE.
"Oh my God. You have to be joking. "
"I'm serious as a heart attack. " I shoved a spoon of ice cream into my mouth.
I was sitting cross-legged on Bailey's couch with an ice cream carton on my thighs, explaining what happened at the Fundraiser I attended. She reacted just how I thought she was going to -shocked.
"I think I'm falling in love with your guy. " she said, her mouth full of ice cream.
She'd gotten vanilla flavour mixed with strawberry and I, coconut and vanilla. It was an awesome combination. Really.
I glared at her and she laughed. "Calm your possessive ass. "
"My ass isn't possessive. " I grumbled halfheartedly, knowing it really was.
"Sure is. " she laughed then seemed like she remembered something. "Where does Trent fit in all this? "
I sighed, my shoulders dropping, "That's the issue. I don't know. "
She dropped her spoon in her ice-cream, "Kate, you have to talk to him about this. "
I stopped eating, frustrated, "You think I don't know that? " I snapped, "This is hard on me too. "
"Well, then talk to him before it gets a lot more complicated. " she fired back.
"Newsflash, Bailey, it already is. " I got up off the couch, my appetite gone, "What the hell is it to you anyway? "
She squinted at me, "Are you for real? "
"Yeah. " I crossed my arms, "Why are you all up in my case all of a sudden? "
She huffed, "Because he's my friend and I don't want to see him get hurt. Even if you don't care, I do! "
I deflated. That was a detail I forgot. Shit. Me and my temper.
"Bailey, I'm sorry. "
She stared at me like she was dissapointed then shook her head, eating a spoon of her ice-cream.
"Bailey... " I walked over to her and sat on the couch next to her. I threw my hand over her shoulder then squeezed her into me, "I'm sorry. "
She dropped her spoon then stared into space, "I feel like I'm loosing you. "
I drew my head back, shocked. Had I heard her correctly? "Loosing me? "
"Yeah. " she whispered.
I was at a complete loss, I didn't know where this was coming from, "You're going to have to make me understand cause I don't. "
"Look how you reacted just now. This is our first fight since we became friends and it's because of Drew. I've never seen you like this before and it's just.... " she sighed, "I don't know, I think you're eventually going to abandon me along the way. "
I sucked in a breath, "Bailey, you can't think like that. "
She shrugged.
I turned to face her, "Really. I love you, Bailey. And I just reacted that way because I've been so frustrated about the whole Trent thing. I'm sorry I took it out on you. "
She gave me a wonky smile, "Besties forever? "
I smiled, "And ever. "
And just like that, I knew what I needed to do next.
•••••••
I rang the doorbell and waited for him to answer. My heart was beating wildly in my chest because of what I was about to do.
He opened the door looking slightly surprised to see me there, but the surprise was quickly replaced with one of the biggest grins I'd ever seen on his face. Probably because this was the first time I'd ever come to visit him -without being asked by him.
He hugged me then pulled away, "Kate, what are you doing here? "
I forced a smile, "I wanted to talk to you. "
He led me into the house, smiling, oblivious to the hell I was going through. "I don't have anything in the house right now, I'm low on grocery. But, there's wine. Do you need wine? "
I nodded. "Yeah. " I needed some liquid courage anyway.
He came back then we sat in his living room, him beside me on the big couch. "So, what is it you want to talk about? "
I dropped my glass on the table, rubbing my palms on my thigh. "Yeah, that.... "
He frowned, "Are you okay? You look pensive. "
"I am. " I turned to face him, "Trent, you're one of the best people there are on this world. And that's rare. You're amazing, you're caring and above all, you're loyal. I honestly haven't met anyone like you. "
He smiled.
Here comes the hard part, "I care so much about you, Trent. So much that I can't let anyone hurt you. . Even if that person is me. "
He blinked, "What? "
"Trent, I'm letting you go. " I whispered.
He gave a sharp exhalation, his hands shaking as he struggled to place his glass on the table. "What are you saying, Kate? "
I felt tears pooling in my eyes. "Trent, I can't be with you anymore. "
He stood up, pacing and running his hand through his hair, "Where is this coming from? We were okay. We are okay. " he turned sharply to face me, "Aren't we? "
I shook my head, controlling a sob.
He knelt in front of me, "Tell me what's wrong, Kate. I swear, I'll fix it. Have I not been giving you enough attention?... Have I -"
I placed a hand over his lips, unable to hear him do this to himself, "Don't do this. It's not you, Trent. It's me. "
His eyes were wide, frantic, "I won't let you go, Kate. I can't. Not without an explanation. "
I inhaled raggedly, knowing what I was about to say was going to hurt him, "My heart's not in it, Trent. "
He lost his bearing and fell on his ass, "Kate...... Do you have feelings for someone else? "
I nodded.
He stared at me for a while then dropped his eyes. He looked lost. So fucking lost. It called to the hugger in me. I knelt down in front of him about to put my hands around him when he scooted away.
"No. Stop. "
I dropped my hand, rejected.
He looked up immediately, "No, I didn't mean.... Shit. " he closed his eyes briefly, "I just can't right now. "
I sobbed, nodding my head because I understood him. I did. But it didn't stop me from getting hurt. When he opened his eyes later, they were filled with tears. It wrecked me.
"Trent... " tears rolled freely down my eyes at the sight of his. I just couldn't help it. Trent had been there for me when nobody was. He was a big baby. My own personal teddy bear. And I was losing him over someone that might not even care about me. I almost changed my mind and just tell Trent it was all a lie but even if I did get into this with him again, I'd still be hurting him because I didn't really care for him. Not like I cared for Drew anyway.
"I love you. " he whispered, staring at me like he was memorizing every inch of me.
My heart broke because I couldn't say those words back. "Trent.... "
He traced his index finger along the contours of my face, lips, eyes, nose and ears. My tears were pouring freely now. Then before I knew it, he dragged me to him, hugging me so tight, he nearly suffocated me.
"Goodbye, Kate. " he whispered into my hair then pressed a kiss to my forehead.
"Goodbye, Trent. " I hugged him back and stayed like that for as long as I could before he could push me away. Saying goodbye to what we had and what we could've had.
Thirty minutes later, I was in a cab, crying in the backseat. I don't remember the directions I gave the driver but when he stopped, I saw it was in front of a big building.
I got out on autopilot and stepped into the building. I got to the front desk and told the receptionist who I was here to see. She told me to hold on, made a call, then told me it was okay to go up. All the while, staring at me like I was a crazy person and I couldn't blame her. For all I knew, I had tear tracks, my eyes were red and swollen and my hair was probably disheveled.
I got in the elevator, pushing the number for his floor.
When the doors opened, I saw the one person I shouldn't be seeing right now. But I didn't care -I was way past caring. I threw myself into his hands and cried.
DREW.
"Emily, stop. " I sighed, beyond exasperated, "I've told you several times but you're just too hard headed to get it. "
"No, I hear you. I just know you don't mean it. "
I've spent the last ten minutes on the phone with Emily, explaining to her that we weren't together. I was going to do it in person but then I received flowers with a card that read;
Saw these roses and they reminded me of you. Thank you for being the best boyfriend ever!
As if telling me flowers reminded her of me wasn't bad enough, she called me her boyfriend. Boyfriend.
"I do mean it. We're nothing. I fucked you just once when I was barely lucid doesn't make us a couple. I'm not your boyfriend, Emily. " I snapped then hung up.
I'd just dropped my phone when it started ringing again. I swiped.
"Mr. Rutledge? There's a woman down here that says she wants to see you. " it was the receptionist at the front desk.
I wondered for a brief moment if it was Emily and almost told her no. But something stopped me, "What's her name? " I asked.
I heard her relaying the question then she said, "Kate. "
Shit. Kate was here? "Let her up. "
I flung a stray pillow on my couch then checked for anything that might be lying around. Everything was in order.
I stared at my home through a stranger's eyes and came up with three words -luxurious, modern, male.
Satisfied, I stood in front of the elevator awaiting her arrival. When the doors opened, the first thing I thought was -what the hell?
She threw herself into my arms, sobbing uncontrollably. At first, I was too shocked to move, but after a while, I got my bearings. I picked her up then carried her into my living room. I sat down then placed her sideways on my lap, patting her back awkwardly. I was at a complete loss for what to do. I'd never been in this position before so I didn't know what to do to make her feel better.
We stayed like that for a long time and just when I thought she must have dozed off, she started talking.
"I broke up with Trent. "
It was barely audible, I thought I'd misheard her, "Come again? "
"I broke up with Trent. " she repeated.
The relief I felt was profound. Did that make me an asshole? Maybe. But in my defense, Trent had been the only thing standing between me and Kate. And now that he was out of the picture? I had a shot.
That explained why she'd been crying when she came, "I assume it didn't go well. "
"It didn't. He was so devastated, Drew. I've never seen him like that. "
How she said that told me she still cared about the guy. I didn't know what to say so I kept quiet. This was her ex we were falling about. Saying something negative night backfire and I couldn't find it in myself to say something positive. Hence, my muteness. This whole thing was unfamiliar territory to me.
"Drew? " she called.
"Yeah? "
"Have you ever been in love? "
I didn't have to think, "No. "
She sighed then slumped against me, "I'm a bad person. "
"No, you're not. "
She got up, just now seeing my apartment for the first time, "You have a nice place. "
"Thanks. "
"Give me a tour? " she smiled at me.
"There's no need for that, really. You can do that -"
She sighed, "I'm just asking fora distraction. "
Oh. Right. I got up then gave her the 'tour' she asked for. She paused when she got to my bedroom.
"This is where you sleep. " she murmured.
"More like where I keep my stuff. "
She frowned, turning to me, "What do you mean? "
"I barely sleep. " I shrugged like it was no big deal. And in a way, it wasn't. I'd gotten used to it.
She chewed on her bottom lip, distracting me for a second, "You have insomnia. "
It wasn't a question but I nodded anyway.
She stepped into my room, running her hand along the surfaces she reached. She glanced at me, a small smile on her face. "I'm actually here. "
I cocked a brow.
"I mean here, in your room. " she laughed. "It's surreal. " she looked giddy. I liked her like this. Happy. I liked how she could be sad one moment then happy the next.
"Why are you just standing there? " she asked, pulling me out of my thoughts.
"I'm watching you. " that was a lie. Seeing her in my room did things to me. I'd never had someone else in here and her feminity contrasted with the masculinity of the place. I didn't want to tell her I was currently battling a major hard on.
But she saw right through me, "You're so full of shit. "
I chuckled. I liked this too. The fact that she didn't put up with my assholery and called me out on my bullshit was fresh as hell.
"I'm done. " then she walked past me. I followed her into the living room and saw she sat there, looking dejected.
I thought of what I could do to cheer her up, "Are you up for going out? " I asked out of nowhere.
She jumped slightly in shock, like she'd forgotten I was there, then she recovered "Go out where? "
I shrugged. "Anywhere. Restaurant, ice-cream, chocolates... Anything. "
She stared at me but she didn't say anything. I started to feel uncomfortable under her perusal. Hell, I'd gone out of my way to want to do something nice for her but if she didn't like it she didn't have to force herself.
"We don't have to if -"
"I'd love to. "
I turned sharply, going into my room to change. Damn that woman made me do insane things. Taking her out? What was I getting myself into?
I made a call to my substitute driver -Hakim, to have the car ready out front.
The tension when we got into the elevator was palpable. God knew I was on my best behaviour because she just got out of a relationship. Staring at her lips everytime she nibbled on it in thought, her as as she walked in front of me and her chest moving up and down with her breathing.
I couldn't get out of the elevator fast enough. I caught sight of Hakim leaning against the vehicle. He straightened immediately he saw us, opening the door for Kate.
"Thank you. " she beamed at him.
"My pleasure. " he tipped his hat.
"You don't have to do that, you know. " I told her as soon as we were seated.
"Do what? " she asked, confused.
"Thank him or even acknowledge him. "
"I was thanking him for opening my door. "
"That's his job. " I argued.
"Doesn't mean you have to be mean. Stop being an asshole. " she scowled.
I sighed, dropping the case. The sound of a phone ringing filled the car.
Kate fumbled for her phone, "Sorry. I need to take this. "
I nodded.
"Hey..... Yeah...... No, he didn't take it well.... I'm with him right now... Whatever.... Bye. " she had a smile on her face by the time she was done.
I didn't want to ask. I honestly didn't. But my possessive ass just had to, "Who was that? "
"My best friend, Bailey. You've met her before. That day at... " she trailed off. We didn't needa reminder of our rocky past.
"Yeah, I remember. " I said so she wouldn't feel bad. It was my fault after all.
"Sir, where exactly are we going? " Hakim asked.
I turned to Kate waiting for her decision, "Where to, Miss Rossi? "
She grinned, "There's a restaurant downtown and I've never really tried their food so... " she raised her shoulder in a half shrug.
"Where is it? "
She gave the directions to Hakim then proceeded to smile at me like there was something going on that I didn't know about.
"What? " I asked, looking away. Her eyes made me uncomfortable. I'd never tell her, but they did. I felt they saw right through me, broke down my walls bit by bit and I couldn't let that happen.
"You're a nice person, you know that? " she murmured.
I tugged at the collar of my shirt because suddenly, it became too hard to breathe, "No, I'm not. "
She rolled her eyes, "Yes, you are. You do nice things all the time. You just act like an asshole so people wouldn't see that side you. "
"You're wrong. Don't get used to me being this way with you. This was an exception. " I snapped, because, hell, she was already too close. Closer than I wanted anyone to be. I needed to create some boundaries between us.
I kept my gaze straight at the headrest in front of me because I didn't want to meet her hurt eyes.
"See? That's exactly what you're doing right now. " she said softly, and I could hear a hint of amusement in her voice.
I whipped my head to her, shocked that she was smiling. I could hear Hakim snickering discreetly in the front seat. I shook my head then brought out my phone so I wouldn't have to speak to her unnecessarily.
"Drew? " she called softly. Her voice was like a siren's, commanding my attention whether I wanted to give it to her or not.
"Yeah? "
"I'm glad I came over. "
I opened my mouth and shocked myself, "Me too. " because it was true. I was glad she came over.
Hello.
I have to confess, I cried writing Kate's break up with Trent.
I was sad she had to leave him but hey when Kate makes up her mind, she's going through with it.
Trent is my baby forever, though.