Chapter 36

DREW.
It's been a week now since Kate broke up with me. A whole fucking week. And I hadn't seen nor spoken to her. This was hell on another level. I wouldn't even wish the kind of suffering I was going through on another person.
Chase has been to my house and the office –which I had finally picked my sorry ass off the floor and gone to two days ago– to make sure I wasn't having suicidal thoughts. And who could blame him? At the rate I was going, drinking myself to stupor every minute I got the chance, refusing to eat and blowing Kate's phone up with messages, there was no doubt suicide would soon be thrown in there somewhere.
In the office, people ran away from me like I was a monster, because according to Arash, I had gotten worse than before. I knew how I was before. Worse had to be unbearable. And to make matters worse, my assistant resigned because she couldn't deal with my surly ass anymore.
I now had a sixty-something years old assistant, whom I had to repeat orders to three times before she got the memo. Fuck my life.
Just when I thought things couldn't get worse than they were, Emily waltzed into my office.
"How the fuck–. " I paused, remembering the functional state of my assistant. "No, scratch that. What the hell are you doing here? "
"Obviously what I look like I'm doing. I came to see you. " she scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Why haven't you been picking my calls? "
"Because I've got absolutely nothing to say to you. "
I collected my phone, pretending to get busy on it, meanwhile I was going through the pile of messages I'd been shoving to Kate all through this week.
They were over two hundred now. I stopped counting when it finally dawned on me that she was never going to reply –which happened like two days ago. But I didn't stop texting though. I still had hope. I had never been this hopeful. Probably because it was all I had left.
"I see you've been preoccupied. "
My eyes flitted up to her form. She had her hands crossed, leaning on one leg. She had the stance of a woman prepared for a fight. And I didn't know who the fuck she was preparing to fight, but it definitely wasn't me.
She cocked her brow and I realized she was expecting me to say something. I hadn't even heard what she had said in the first place.
"What the hell is your problem, Drew? " she snapped, inching closer, "You think you can just love me and leave me like that? "
"Love you? " I echoed. This girl was delusional as all fucks.
"And then when I finally see you, you're with a girl!? " she thundered, "Who the hell is she anyway? "
I narrowed my eyes. "You might want to think twice before you speak about Kate in that manner to me. Or to anyone else for that matter. "
She gasped, "Are you threatening me? "
"I could give a fuck about your life, much less threathen it. "
Her mouth fell open and her eyes widened in shock. "Where have you been hiding this attitude? "
"I haven't been hiding it. You've just been refusing to see it. " I answered impatiently, "What the hell are you really doing here, Emily? "
She stared at me a while, before she recovered, putting that innocent expression back on her face ever so smoothly, "I actually wanted to speak to you. "
"Then get on with it. "
She sat on the visitor's chair, crossing her legs as she leaned forward, and I briefly wondered if she just wanted to topple over the table. "Well, are you going to make us official or what? I got hit on by several guys this week and you probably haven't realized that I'm not going to be single forever. "
What in the fresh hell was this? I refused to believe she was this oblivious. She still thought that there was something going on between us? And even after what I had just told her, she was just going to act like everything was okay and I hadn't basically just told her she didn't exist to me. And had she said 'make his official'?
"So when did you realize we weren't dating? "
"When I saw you with that girl. " she answered matter-of-factly, "I figured you were just waiting for me to make it official, even though I was waiting for you to do it and you were a bit slow. " she shrugged, "Better late than never, I guess. "
Wow. This girl was seriously fucked up in the head. I think she needed to see a therapist or something. How could someone flat out lie to theirselves about something like that? That was on another level of fucked up.
"When did I ever give you the idea that there was going to be something between us? "
"Um..... The night you slept with me? " she tilted her head at me like I was slow.
"Sleeping with you doesn't necessarily mean there is going to be something between us, Emily. " I stressed, "Besides I was drunk that night. We both were. "
"I wasn't. " she admitted quietly.
"Well, I was. "
She looked sort of crestfallen. And for the first time, I wasn't feeling frustration towards her. Something bubbled up my chest. And I realized it was sympathy towards her. I truly felt bad for her.
"Did I ever make you think I had feelings for you? " I asked softly. Carefully.
She glanced at me, then she dropped her eyes to her lap, "Well, you did. That night when you kissed me. " her eyes darted to mine, "At the bar. I thought maybe you were actually starting to feel something for me. "
I felt a pang in my chest. No matter how bad I wanted to deny it, I knew it was true. I had continually taken her to events, gone on dinner dates with her, and went as far as inviting her on my outing with Chase. Kate was right. I couldn't do all those things with a girl and expect her not to want something in return.
Thinking about it now, had me comparing myself to her. If I had gone out on several dates with Kate and then later, she told me tmwe weren't together, and then I caught her with some other guy, I would lose my damn mind. I carried the bigger blame in Emily's situation.
"Do you have feelings for me? " I asked before I could stop myself.
She gave me a bitter smile, nodding. And my heart broke for her even more.
Love was supposed to be a good thing. Everyone said it was the best feeling in the whole fucking world and that you weren't living if you weren't experiencing it. I was experiencing it. The why the fuck did I feel like I was dying then? We were both in pain. She couldn't have the person she loved and I couldn't have the person I loved. We were more alike than I thought we were.
"I'm sorry, Em. " I said, the nickname slipping freely from my lips, "I don't.... I can't... I'm sorry I made you believe that there could be something between us. "
She nodded slowly, like she was slowly coming to terms with that fact.
"The girl I saw you with..... "
I nodded, silently telling her to go on.
"You have feelings for her. " It wasn't a question.
"I love her. "
Her eyes widened slightly, but she didn't look all that surprised, "Wow. That's..... I'm happy you finally found that. "
I shrugged and the pain in my chest intensified. How much more could I go on without her?
"Who knew it would hurt so bad, though. Yeah? " I asked, injecting a little humor into it.
She smiled, shaking her head. "Yeah..." she got up, grabbing her purse as she did. "Well, I'll be going now. Since... "
"Emily? " I called.
She paused, turning around to raise a brow at me. No doubt she was wondering what else I had to say. "Yes? "
I got up from my chair, rounded the table, and envolped her in a hug that caught her by surprise. She was tense in my arms at first, but after a while, she got the meaning of the hug and she returned it, encircling me with her arms.
We stayed like that for a while, with me resting my chin on her head, "We'll both be okay, yeah? "
"Yeah. " she nodded, smiling softly. "She's lucky to have you, Drew. "
"Other way round. " I corrected her.
We finally ended the hug, and she pulled her hair back from her face, straightening her blue gown.
"Goodbye, Drew. I believe we'll be friends eventually. " she paused, tilting her head to the side with a small smile playing on her lips, "Good ones. "
"Definitely. " I grinned, shoving my hands into my pocket.
She walked out, closing the door behind her as she did. Emily and I were better as friends, than enemies. Why did it take Kate breaking up with me to make me come to a conclusion like that?
I had solved my problem with Emily. But how was I going to sort my shit with Kate?
KATE.
I strolled casually outside Rutledge Towers, glancing around as I did. People went about their usual days, some hurrying to work, and others, couples, just lazying around, enjoying their day.
I had decided to start work eventually, because I couldn't keep calling in sick. I was going to have to face the music eventually, and why not do it earlier rather than later?
Bailey had come to see me once and of course she figured out that Drew and I had a fight. I hadn't been able to tell her the reason for the fight because it was highly confidential, but I also had to give her something. So I had filtered the whole thing to an extent. I explained to her that Drew had known my parents before I even met him. I told her that my parents had done something to Drew that caused him to hate me so much when we first met, but I didn't tell her what he did. And she probably understood I couldn't, because she didn't ask.
To put things mildly, I told her we were having a break because I needed to think clearly and I wouldn't be able to do that at his place. Not with him there.
In my periphery, I saw a car driving in my direction. The car was a blue colour, and it was a fancy make. It was definitely a very expensive car. But there was nothing too catchy about it –seeing expensive cars was a normalty in New York.
I watched as the car slowly rolled to a stop in front of Rutledge Towers, that meant it stopped in front of me. The movement of the back car door opening, had me snapping out of my thoughts.
Why was I still standing here, anyway? I had to be on my way to get me and Sue's coffee. Not stand here, watching people live their lives.
I stepped around the car to stand somewhere where I would be more visible, and thrust my right hand out to flag down a taxi.
Finally, a taxi stopped in front of me. I opened the back door to get in, but a hand grasped mine, stopping me from entering. I reacted instantly to a strange hand gripping mine. I drew my hand back, opening my mouth to fire insults at the person.
I froze when I saw who was holding my hand.
"Mrs. Rutledge? "
"Yes, it's me. " she angled her head, "Kate, isn't it? "
I nodded, feeling a little bit embarrassed when I remembered how I had reacted to her hand holding mine. "I'm sorry for reacting like that. I didn't know it was you. "
She gave me a small, warm smile, "No, it was my fault for grabbing your arm. I just couldn't let you leave. "
I frowned, "Why? "
She looked a bit caught off guard for a moment then she raised her hand as if signalling someone. I looked behind her and saw it was directed at her driver. He nodded at her and went back into the car.
"Would you mind joining me for coffee? " she smiled slightly.
I wondered if I should go with her. It was impossible not to look at her differently after everything Drew told him. I was mad at his parents for abandoning him like that. If not for them, none of what happened would have ever had the chance to.
"I'm supposed to be getting lunch for my boss.... " I trailed off, knowing she would get the hint.
Her face fell in disappointment, "Of course. Probably another time. " she nodded, letting my hand go. And that was when I realized she had still been holding my hand all this time.
She turned around to go into the building, probably to see Drew. She was willing to speak to me, and why shouldn't I let her? She had a connection to Drew, no matter how much Drew claimed to hate his parents, I saw how he had reacted to his mother being in this hospital.
He loved her, even though he wouldn't necessarily admit it. She was his mother for God's sake. Had given birth to him. There was no way she couldn't care for him, even if just a little. Back then when we had met her at the restaurant, she had looked like she had been starving for a conversation with Drew, no matter how short.
She must love him in her own way too. I believed something was wrong, maybe it was Drew's dad that was the major problem, but I wasn't sure. I needed to know what the Rutledge dynamic was. And if I wanted to know, I had to have this conversation with her. Even if it meant having coffee with her.
"Mrs. Rutledge. " I called when she was just about to push the spinning doors of Rutledge Towers open.
She looked back, giving me a questioning look. But I could detect hope in there somewhere.
How badly could a woman want connection from her own son that she would seek it out from his girlfriend? Ex? Who even knew what we were anymore?
"I could squeeze one cup in. " I smiled so she wouldn't feel like she was strong arming me into this.
She nodded and she walked away from the door, towards the car. She stopped when she got close to it, waving me over with her arm. "Let's go. Shall we? "
I walked towards her, waiting for her to enter into the car first before I did. I briefly wondered if I should ask her to go to Tasty Sips. But I squashed that idea down. I wouldn't want distraction in the little time I was going to get with her.
The driver pulled over to a much larger shop with wider variety of things to offer.
We walked into the shop, with Drew's mom directing us towards a seat by the corner. It gave us a direct view to watch all what was happening outside. It was my ideal type of seat; one I would choose if I were to come here myself. Drew's mom and I apparently had that in common.
The waitress came over to ask us our orders.
"I'll have a cup of coffee, with milk and sugar please. "
The waitress turned to me with a smile.
"I'll get the same. "
She hurried off to get us our orders, and I found myself studying the enigma that was Drew's mom. She was obviously strong and healthy, that meant she had made a full recovery. I was glad for Drew's sake. One less thing to worry about.
You, being the major thing.
"So, we've never really had the chance to talk properly. " she started, "Although that's due to Drew who wouldn't let you out of his sight for a minute. "
My heart clenched at the mention of Drew's name, but I smiled through the hurt.
"You're good for him. " she appraised.
"Thank you Mrs Rutledge. "
Our orders were brought over and me and Mrs Drew fell into an easy conversation, getting to know one another. With the way she spoke of Drew, I knew she cared about him. Much more than Drew might think she did.
"Thank you for having coffee with me. " she said when our tables had been cleared and we were just watching the view, "I know he probably wouldn't have let me speak to you had he known I was going to. "
She knew her son so well. "He probably wouldn't have. And he wouldn't even know you spoke to me today, anyway. " I paused, "Well, unless you tell him. "
"What do you mean he wouldn't know? "
I fidgeted with the strap of my purse. I had gone and put myself in this one now. "We're not really on speaking terms at the moment. "
Her eyes widened in true horror, "Oh my God. What happened? "
I hurried to shake my head, not wanting her to worry. "It's nothing important. It's just...."
"Well, it certainly is important if you're not speaking to each other. " she cut in. "What happened? "
I shrugged, picking an imaginary lint off my gown, "We had a disagreement. " I lied effortlessly, "We're just taking time away from each other to clear our heads. We'll be okay. " I reassured her.
She smiled eventually, even though she still looked like she doubted me.
"I'm glad my son has you, Kate. You're really good for him, I can tell. The pictures I've been seeing online, he smiles a lot more. And I know it's you I have to thank for that. "
"Wait. Pictures online? "
"You didn't know? " she laughed, "There are pictures of Andrew and you everywhere. How can you not know? "
I shrugged. "I never... Checked? "
She showed her teeth in a grin that transformed her entire face and I couldn't help but admire just how good she looked. To an onlooker, it would seem I was having a good time with my friend, no one would know she was actually three decades older than me. And although, she had surgery to thank for that, she was still a very pretty woman. No one could deny that.
We made our way outside and before we knew it, we were back at Rutledge Towers. I was feeling reluctant to leave. I enjoyed her company and I wanted to spend more time with her, but I couldn't hog her. She wanted to see her son after all.
"We should do this some other time. "
"We will. " I said in true honesty, "Have a good day, Mrs. Rutledge. "
"You too, Kate. " she smiled, before the elevator's door closed.
I wondered how her conversation with Drew would go. Great, I hoped.