WHITNEY

I woke up in the morning, with an incomprehensible desire to move on, to leave this mansion.

The voice hurried me to leave, and it was stronger than I.

I had an intuition that it could be a trick he was using to keep me there and make me hope I had too much time.
If he had locked his office, it was the result of the doubts he had about me, there was no other intention that could justify his actions.

The days he prolonged were just an artifice to keep me there.
I was paranoid, I imagined by just a sentence a thousand possible tricks.

In this atmosphere of war, giving his faith was the silliest mistake I could do.
Petterson had already proved It to me.

I stood off the bed, early, and entered the bathroom, I felt likewise I had no control over my move, everything I made was with so haste.

There was a voice growling, yelling, telling me to move my ass from this or else it would be burned.

I came out of the closet, my heart arranged into a ponytail, I didn't want to take luggage, It would be alerting, I took my purse and the documents I needed. It was just 7 am and I had to go out without anybody following me.

What should I do?

I had just to order it. How silly could I be?
They all have immense respect toward Armand, and I was considered his Luna, thus they would respect whatever would come out of my mouth.

All the other documents considering my inheritance or whatever else I possessed were at my mansion.

I climbed down the stairs, greeting the maids who were stunned to see me going out so early in the morning, I gathered my composure and headed to the door.

No explanations, they didn't deserve any.
I walked, crossed the entrance, and entered my vehicle.

"I am coming, if he calls, tell him I went to my mother's house," I said to those who were staring at me and to the doorkeeper.

I had to tell them, it would be suspicious if I went out without any word to anybody, and it would force him to shorten his trip.

Though I believe this prolongation was to keep me there and surprised me.

Nobody dared pursued me, my facial expression told enough of the way I felt.

I drove immediately to the estate, Jelena and Nelson were delighted and at the same time anxious by the way I was acting with so much precipitation.

I had succeeded to fulfill what I so badly wanted during my whole life, it was now just a matter of time before the bomb demolished everything, his anger would be destructive and I had to protect everyone I cared about.

"What is going on madam?" Nelson asked

"Keep your luggage ready, we will leave New York for a while" I responded, climbing the stairs to gather all the documents I had.

"There is anything wrong madam?" Jelena with a fearful tone raised a question.

"Just do what I am telling you to" I blurted sternly, raising the tone of my voice. I didn't have the time to explain everything I didn't want to lose somebody else.

They obeyed and headed to their apartment.
I should protect them.

After a while, I had collected everything and they were waiting for me in the living room, already ready.

"You will go first and I will follow"

"Take the flight to England. You know the mansion, somebody is waiting for you there, he will tell you what you have to do"
I gave these instructions with the most possible seriousness.

"Okay madam" They responded, knowing they just had to obey. They knew that never I would try something against them.

They entered the vehicle with the driver and went, it was one less charge.

I exhaled alleviating my heart, and went to my mother's grave.
I was alone, I felt so lonely, I needed to talk with her, the one who was always there attentive to whatever I would say.

"Mom..!" I fell on her grave, sobbing, unable to retain my tears.

'I made it Mom. It is just now a matter of time, he will sink, and he will pay Mom for what he did, for your death and everything he made.'
My monologue was filled with so much sadness, my heart was always so broken.

'But mom, to tell you the truth...'I paused crying louder, with an oozing heart.

'I don't feel the joy I thought I would have to feel when everything will be settled, Mom.

'I feel so empty, it didn't give me the satisfaction I expected. You were so exact and I was always wrong.'

'I miss him, Mom, I miss him so badly Mom.'I cried, with tears dripping down my cheeks as a cascade.

'He is always waiting for you, he loves you, just make the first move.' I heard my she-angel on my shoulder whispering into my ear.

Impossible, I remembered at this moment everything we had lived together, all those amazing days I spent at his side but the image of my betrayal crossed instantly my psyche.

'It is impossible Mom, not after what I did.' I stated.

'Just try, you'll always blame yourself for what you didn't commit than what you have done.' this voice was my mother, she was so close to me. I felt her warm presence, She hadn't left my side after all this time.

She was right, as always, I thanked her and on my feet, I took my document and headed to where he was leaving.

My heart was racing faster as close as I became to his house.
My chest described the panic I felt through the way I was breathing.

I was in front of the gate, reluctant to enter, ignoring what I would say, after all those months I was ashamed of myself.

What if he had somebody else?

What if he was no more interested to be with me?

After a sigh, a boost of courage filled my heart, deciding I would fight for him as he always did for me.

I would explain everything, he needed to know, I had hidden him everything for so long.

The gate opened, and I entered the villa, inching slowly toward the building, holding my heart, preparing for every reaction he would have, I knew I deserved whatever he would choose to make me endure.

I needed him, I was dazzled by the grudge and burned by the anger, I would make whatever ought to be done to be again with him.

As early as I entered the living room, I saw the maids whose eyes were wide open, looking like they were staring at a ghost.

They didn't leave me the opportunity to utter a word, I saw their head shaking in disapproval.

He was no more in the town, it lasted now more than two months. It meant since the last time he met me with Petterson at the mansion.

I had hurt him, I must meet him now and apologize for what I did, even if it was the last thing I had to do.