Chapter 25

Wearing a furry jacket matching with furry boots. Just right for the climate here in Italy. In my two months here I can say that I immediately adopt living here. I have no news about what happened in Philippines. It’s not easy to forget all that happened especially the people I left there. Everything was rush because of papa's creditors who were already forcing him. I had no choice because I didn’t want the same thing to happen to Savier.

Last time I heard his voice he was with a woman. It was like a knife was stabbing my heart. Let me just imagine ... he was with someone else. He is kissing someone else. It hurts ... too much. All I know is that what happened easily spread to our distant family.Especially my pregnancy but it stopped immediately. The media also became aggressive towards papa there.

Caleb and I both signed the marriage contract. We got married before we went here in Italy. We have stayed in one roof, we stayed in the same house. And because I continue to study here, Caleb and I went to the same school.
Ca Foscari 'University is one of famous Universities here in Italy. Everything I needed was given to me by my father. I fulfilled the wishes of the James Santiago. So papa also fulfills my needs. I want to fix myself again. I want to rebuild my confidence like before. Caleb and I had a private marriage with the judge. But that did not escape the observant media. It still spreads.

The last thing Caleb told me. The Santiago is said to be the head of Dela Rama Corporation. They only have more shares than dad. My father went back to start but that's before than he fell even more. Caleb also contributed greatly to my education. So I receive money sometimes. I am also Accepting a freelance model whoever wants to hire me because I'm determined to make money. Milano MI, Italy is the address of our apartment. There's two bed rooms. We don’t sleep together, We treat each other like a friend. He respected my decision that I did not want to reciprocate his view of me.

I went to Pinsere 'one of my favorite pizza restaurants here. Immediately a waiter who was already familiar to me approached.

"Good morning, Bella Signora. Ill tuo ordine '?" he said in Italian.

"Pizza margherita, and Italian coffee, per favore '." I said and looked away.

"Subito, Bella Signora." He left immediately. It was comforting to listen to the beautiful music here inside. It feels relaxing so that’s why I like to come back here especially because of their food. I miss the street foods of the Philippines. That I also miss the simple living in the province.

My heart ached as I remembered the memories of the two of us. I'll admit ... I'm so sorry from what I’ve done. I'm especially sorry that we're not blood relatives. I had a lot to ask but it was because of papa I didn’t have time to talk to Nana Sena.

Does Savier know anything? Then why didn't he say it to me? It's really hard to start at the beginning. I will never blame Savier for my sacrifice because I was the first who give up. I'm the one who left. I'd understand if one day we meet ... he won't love me anymore and I don't know if he will forgive me? Well ... can I do anything? Is there anything I can do to change the things I have done to him?

Unaware of the tears dripping. I immediately took a tissue from the table and wiped my cheek.

My cellphone rang. I saw Aunt Anna calling me.

"Yes Aunty?" I answered.

"Hija, Your dad.." Her voice was nervous.

"What about papa Aunty?" I was immediately alarmed.

"I rushed him to the hospital hija . His headache is getting worse ... and .... your mama is here." I closed my eyes tightly and swallowed . I really want to see mom. When I left there, she talked with Nana Sena. I don't know the other details. I also want to finish my studies here and be able to find a job so that somehow before I return to Manila I will no longer depend on money that is not mine.

"I'm just telling you this hija because you know your dad wants to talk to you."

"I'm sorry auntie I am also busy studying. Please..take care of him."

"I will, hija." I don't know if aunty Anna and Mama have a good conversation. But hopefully not everything will be complicated. After dinner I walked home to the apartment. I bought fresh milk and bread just outside the apartment. I opened the locked of my apartment.

Yes, what I saw in the living room was like before. I rolled my eyes and closed the door.

"Can't both of you reach the bedroom?" I tease Marie and Caleb kissing on the sofa. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen them kissing. Many times already but this Caleb is still hard to get once in a while. He said he don’t like Marrie but sometimes I saw them making out!

I don’t know what to say actually, this man is married to me but I am happy to see him with my step sister. We are just married in papers after all.

"Shit!" he immediately pushed Marrie who just giggled.

"What's that!? You're always wrong timing sister! Just moved to my apartment? Let’s exchange?"

"Don't you dare." Caleb immediately stopped and shot Marrie an evil look. Marrie sniffed suppressing a smile .

"You always eat bread Roxette, Caleb cooked a lot here."

I shook my head. "I just missed eating it and the milk." I was stopped by the memory of Savier. He really wanted me to drink milk. Shit! I blinked and looked up.

"O? what is that ?! Will you cry again? That's why I followed you here because I knew you would be emotional. "

"It's not easy to move on."

"I know, but don't hurt yourself Rox. He's with someone-"

"I know okay?" I glared at her and put the purchased fresh milk in the fridge.

"Why don't you want to know what's going on there?"

"I'm just going to get hurt myself, okay? So if you know something just don't tell me. I'm here to fix myself, to graduate and get a job because somehow when I went back there I fixed myself before I faced him. What I did to him is painful. We're both stuck in a life full of lies. "

"So, you has a plan when you comes back?"

I blinked before nodding softly.

"Are you coming back , really?" sarcasm she said to me.

"Shut up Marrie, can't you just lock yourself in your room?" Caleb groaned as he came out of his room. Still wearing a t shirt. I looked at Marrie whose throat was dry when he saw Caleb's hunk physique.

"It’s so hot in here.” she joke to me that I laughed. It was late at night and Marrie didn't even leave the apartment. Just like in previous weeks, Marrie has always slept here. She Just go home to her apartment to get her clothes. She was also always fighting with Caleb. I think Caleb who likes her too but please! Caleb is hard to get.

Aside from us, Marrie also knew we were married on paper and she also knew I was just doing it for Savier. The three of us used to go to an exclusive bar here in Italy every Saturday night. Wearing a white fitted tube dress matching with gray sandals we are ready to leave. Caleb's eyebrows met as he looked at my sister's red mini dress.

"You want to go back to your apartment?" Caleb asked, as we waited after Marrie put on her sandals.

"Huh! Why?" she wonder of it. I rolled my eyes and lazily folded my arms. Here they go again. It's just that Caleb always fights and denies his feeling for my step sister too! I also want to reprimand and curse my step sister.

"If that's what you're wearing, stay here or go home."

"Huh? No !Roxette and I are just the same dress! She’s just wearing color white! "

"Still ..." his jaw tightened and he turned around before coming out first.

Marrie and I looked at each other. Her tears were rolling down her cheeks. "H-He's not really like he used to be."

I took a deep breath before touching her on both shoulders.
"He loves you Marrie. He just stuck because of our situation but I can feel that..he still loves you." she smiled bitterly before nodding.

Harry's Bar is similar to the bar I went to in the Philippines. It's just different..it's wilder here and the design and drinks are different. We sat on a VIP sofa. Far from noisy dancing people. The scenes here are intense inside if you are conservative you will definitely get bored.

"Buonsera '. Ill tuo ordine'?" said the waiter to us.

"Uno sangiovese, dos dolcetto.Per favore, grazie '." it was Caleb who answered because he knew more about the drinks here.

"Subito ', senior."

Caleb sat next to me and across from Caleb was Marrie.

Marrie danced as she sat, watching the dance floor. While I'm watching my cellphone should I install facebook again? I've been deleting it for a long time, especially since I don't want to know what happened to Sav. It might just hurt me more. Three hours ago I had six dolcetto. I admit I'm a bit tipsy. But like before I was comfortable because Marrie and Caleb were there.

I leaned my head on Caleb's shoulder. Caleb sniffed my hair and whispered.
"Please tell your brat step sister to stop drinking!" he hissed. I lifted my head and watched Marrie stand up. Caleb immediately restrained her elbow. I’m used to Caleb’s actions. Sometimes he hugs me and sometimes touches my shoulder but that just doesn’t excite in me. Because we both know what we are and he also knew who he wanted.

"Let's dance, Roxette! Come on!"

"No." stopped Caleb.

"What No? Hello~, What do you think here? We're going to read? We are in a bar! Come on Roxette!" she pulled me upright to the dance floor, make it even harder for the two of us, especially since we are tipsy.

"Whoooo!" Marrie screamed and began to dance.

"Shit!" Caleb cursed when Marrie jumped. I grinned at the two so I leave them there, I'll just dance too. I stroked my hair with the sweetness of the music and grinded my waist. I touch my legs then suddenly my hand brushed the hem of my dress so it went up a bit.

I am a bit tipsy to fix it so I just let it. I close my eyes and dance. Now ... I remember the touches of Sav. The way we live in the province, the way he care for me. The way he fuck me roughly. The way he kissed me savagely.

I felt a large hand grip my waist. I opened my eyes. Caleb and Marrie were no longer around. Some are looking at me and others have their own world.

The man behind me sniffed my ear. And weirdly. I liked his caress. His hand dropped to my thigh and I felt him fix my skirt. He danced on my back sensually that I almost felt the bulging muscles inside his crotch. Damn it! It's my first time to dance like this with a man and fuck! I like this! Why did I like his touches?
His warm lips kissed my neck and he whispered. "Let's get a room?" I nodded immediately. Fuck it! Am I in some kind of drug? Or spell perhaps?

It seems like just a moment I can't remember the other details I am too dizzy and horny at the same time. His kisses and touch are familiar. The way he kissed me roughly reminds me of someone. I can almost taste a metal on my lips. He's kissing me wildly!

"Ah!" his every move seemed to be in a hurry. He torn apart my dress. I can heard him growled and I want to hear his voice again. But I am too preoccupied with this kind of feeling. This man tasted every part of my body like a thirsty man in a dessert! Damn! And I like it! I am so crazy right now! Why would I want to like this? Why is my body betraying me? My body should only belong to Savier!

I don’t know whose room it is and how I got here with him . All I know is I’m drowning in his kisses. Maybe I need this? Do I need this? I'm just a human being who feels like this but my body should only belong to Savier.

My tears rolled down when I felt his manhood in me. Wild and rough. This man fuck me like a beast. Like he's mad or something I'm the one he's piling on. He pinned my waist and thrust inside me roughly.

"Oh! Oh! A-Ah! Gosh!" I cried with pain and pleasure at the same time.
Why he's so familiar? Even his touch?
"Oh my! Ah! Savier! Oh!" I trembled when I reached my peak! Damn it! I'm really crazy. I'm not really in the right mood anymore I even shouted Savier's name! Surely , tomorrow I will regret it!

I held on to his stiff and muscular shoulder. I saw a tattoo on his arm but I couldn't make it clear because of the darkness.

"Damn it!" he hit the side of my pillow. I couldn't make his voice clear because I was so short of breath. I was like a withered leaf that my hand fell from his shoulder when I finished my peak. I felt the hot liquid in my womanhood.

Fuck! Did I just gave myself in a stranger? I don't even know his name! I could feel his violent breath and if it hadn’t been dark I would have seen his face. Unlike me whose face was partially lit by the moon peeking out the open window. So he freely watches my teary face.

"Fuck you! You even managed to leave me but you're moaning my name? Damn you baby ... Just damn!" I cannot properly heard his angry voice .
I was worn out and drowsy. I can only feel his soft kisses and he murmuring something that I didn't hear clearly. Damn! Alcohol has a devastating effect on me! I just let someone fuck me! Was it because of my extreme need that I was able to give up immediately?