Chapter 37

The next morning, she woke up with a swollen eye and a heart that pounded with panic. She didn't know that if the few hours of sleep she was able to get after she had prayed her subh sallow was the reason she had this so much fear and pain, more than the one she had felt at night in her heart. She went to greet Mama, and the look the woman gave her made Nadia's intestines churn. What was she going to do now? How would she tell Mama that Hussain had divorced her and they weren't leaving together anymore?
She went back to her room and didn't know when she broke into tears. Her gaze fell to Baby H that was peacefully sleeping and she wished she could turn back the hands of time to when all this wouldn't have happened. If Hassan was still alive, oh, would she have ever known this much agony? She sat down at the edge of her bed, helpless. A beep sound from her phone got her attention back to the phone and when she saw that it was a message from Hussain, her hands shook as she picked it.
Was he going to send her another divorce? She hadn't read the paper he had given her, but her instincts had told her that it might have been just one talaq and now after having thought about it, he wanted to just do it all. She felt a tightening in her chest. Never had she thought that separation with Hussain would cause her this much grief and she still didn't know why?
'I know you'd have nothing to tell your family, as I can't tell mine too. They have hopes for this trip, both our mothers and I don't have the heart to break their amazing hearts-' she rolled her eyes at that. So much for a man that could say all he wanted just because he wanted to hurt the woman he claimed to be his wife. She hissed outwardly and realized she was now boiling with rage, and pain, and hope. The last thing that scared her a bit, what was she hoping for? That he said he had taken her back and no one would have to know the divorce had ever existed?
But she knew, she painfully thought and decided to finish reading the text before concluding. 'And it's going to be a waste if you don't travel with me, financially, that is. I've sent both your and Baby H's ticket's and passports, you'll take the next available flight to Florida. Remember, you're still my wife even though I've divorced you, in the views of Islam. And I expect you to do what I've said. At least, before we find the perfect time to tell them about the divorce. You can come back home after two weeks or less, it depends on how I'm willing to stay under the same roof with you.
-Captain H.A. Alkali.'
The level of formality that was portrayed in the message hadn't irked her until she saw the name he had signed the message with. Did he think that it was an email for work or something? Had she ever even given a damn about his damn profession?! Who the hell did he think he is? That he can divorce her and still order her around? Anger boiled in her as she remembered how he had put the words, depending on how he was willing to stay under the same roof with her? Huh! He didn't know who he was dealing with.
'I'd rather refund all the financial waste there is to be than follow a man like you to another country. So, let me know the cost of everything and I'd send it back right away. Please, choose the currency you'd like the refund in, be it Naira or dollar, I'm fine with both. Also, I prefer you'd never contact me again, as of now, I'm no longer your wife and I don't care about any damn viewing, all I know is you're no longer my husband. Lol, husband, that sounds like an insult to me, to have you being called my husband. In a simpler sentence, I'm not leaving, nor my child.
-Nadia Bukar.'
She knew it would enrage him, it would bruise his ego and he'd want to strangle her, but those emotions were the exact ones she wanted to provoke in him and she didn't know when a mirthless chuckle escaped her lips when she saw his call coming through her phone. She declined the call and turned off the phone before she decided to take a nap. Everything over chaos going through in her life could wait, she felt so dizzy and pained to keep floating alive this way. And so, she closed her eyes, a bit sense of triumph boasting her energy a bit as she slept.
•
Mama had waited long enough and she knew she couldn't do that anymore. At this rate, Nadia may have to lose her flight. "You need to wake up or by Allah, I can even beat you to make you do so!" She thundered, knowing so well Nadia knew the way her voice sounded didn't guaranty she ignored her and went back to sleep like she did the countless times she had tried to wake her up.
"Mama," she slurred, sitting upright. "He has left yesterday and said our flight has been rescheduled until after two weeks. How many times do I honestly have to tell you this? Please, let me sleep."
"What is this then? Will you wake up or do you need to see the other side of me that you haven't seen in years?" She lifted the tickets and when Nadia saw the time, she cursed him under her breath. He had sent the tickets even after she had told him that she wasn't going. What was she going to do now? She couldn't leave with him, that would have to be the last thing she would do.
She opened her mouth to protest when Mama shot her a glare. "No more word, I don't care if you've fought with him but you know you're following your husband, right? Get up right now and get ready, I'll set your bags." It left no room for argument, and when Nadia went to shower, she cried. She didn't know what to do, she couldn't tell Mama that he had divorced her yesterday and the hypocrite must've still been acting as though he were a saint.
It was roughly an hour to their flight and the way Mama rushed her out of the house pained so much that she couldn't help crying on their way to the airport. She was helpless, she didn't know what to do. Zarah kept consoling her, thinking that maybe she was going to miss home. Little did she know what was bothering her.
They had delayed, and Nadia only got into the plane when they were almost done boarding and heavens knew, she sincerely wished she had lost her flight. She sat down and stared at the empty seat by her side as pain struck her heart. Maybe he had indeed left yesterday. Where would she even go after landing in Florida? She knew no one there and was sure Hussain may never get them from the airport.
Or maybe he would, because of Baby H. But certainly not for her. The thought brought in an unmeasurable pain but she had already told herself that she was done crying because of him. She had cried enough for the Alkali men. One she wished that her tears would bring her, and she wouldn't mind spending eternity crying for him. But the other? Heavens knew she wanted to exchange him to bring her husband back and have him dead instead.
She had slept through their flight without her knowing and when the crew woke her up that they were about to land, she should fasten her seatbelt, Nadia wanted to scream when she heard the pilot introducing himself as 'Captain Hussain Alkali' as he told the passengers they were about to land at Miami international airport and she stood there, stupefied. He flew them there, he hadn't left yesterday and was with them on this flight!
When another crew member came to her and told her that she'd have to follow her to the pilot's cabin, she was dumbstruck. What was he trying to pull? She politely asked, "But why? I don't know anyone over there." Her smile was intended to look normal, but it must've appeared as tight-lipped for the woman smiled back in return with a knowing look in her eyes.
"Captain Alkali is your husband, he requests for you there. Follow me please." She said and walked away, too much confidence for her to imagine that Nadia would automatically follow her.
But then it wasn't like she had a choice. She wouldn't make a fool out of herself just because she was no longer his wife after he had claimed he was. She didn't know what game he was playing at, but she would have to keep low until they were alone and would give him enough anger to serve him a few days.
The pilot's cabin was nothing like she had ever imagined and she gasped softly. Magnificent! But the moment her eyes got into his, and she saw the hollowness that surrounded him and the obvious lack of sleep through the bags in his eyes, she felt a stab in her chest. She should be happy that he was as rumpled as she was, but damn the man! He had the face she loved and she wouldn't lie to say she wanted to hug him. Damn him for having her husband's face.
She looked away from him and with a voice as cold as her heartfelt, she spoke. "Why did you call me here? To show all these off?" She pointed at everything that was in front of them, even though she was still marvelled by that. "Or, to tell me how merciful you had been? Because just hours ago, you had had full control of my life and if you wanted, you'd have ended it but you chose not to. Which is obviously because of a child you claim to be yours and maybe if humanity had a place in your heart, the other passengers were innocent enough not to be killed-"
He caught her off guard when he held her hand and softly made her sit beside him. She was glad that she had given off Baby H when the woman asked her to, he would've slipped off from her hand at how she felt at the moment. She quickly pulled her hand away from his hold after she had regained her senses.
"What do you think you're doing?" She asked through gritted teeth. "Have you forgotten that you're no longer my husband and that simple touch is now a sin between us?" He was silent, just staring at her with his heart in his eyes and she wanted to run away from here. Didn't he know that he looked like the man she loved? That she may know they were two different people but her heart had still refused to believe so? If he kept on staring at her with those eyes, with that look, she didn't know what else to do.
"First H had once told me that he'd love it if I could..." He choked on his words and decided to say a word at a time. Express one emotion at a time. Through the glass, they could see passengers walking towards the arrivals with exhaustion on their faces. "That you wanted to see the break of dawn from a pilot's eye."
"And so?" She asked, even though she was touched by what he had said. "Don't tell me you're planning to show me one? As per fulfilling the promise he had asked of you?" She rolled her eyes and stood up, "Please, I'm truly tired and need a bed to sleep on to stay here and listen to all this garbage. I'm out of here." And before he was able to get a hold of her, all he saw was a flash movie of the black of her dress in front of his eyes as she went back into the plane.
He placed a hand on his heart and softly fondled it. "Why, Hussain?" He asked himself, his voice choked with emotions as he tried to suppress all that he had been feeling. He admitted that he must've been afraid, of himself more than of anything. And what was it that Mufeeda said? Yes, "I think your pretty wife deserves to know that her husband has been in love with her, even before she got married to his Twin and now..."-- "Just imagine what she'd think now that you've finally gotten her and your Twin, bless his soul, is no more..."
He'd be a coward to say that it was her words that had done it all. Made him scared and pushed him to do and say all this. But what was he going to do? He was clueless, helpless and had no one to turn to. And he hated feeling guilty, not about this. Not towards his Twin, please. He broke into tears, palming his face as his shoulders shook. He didn't know what to do now, but he knew he had missed his Twin and would appreciate a hug at the moment. He had never done a mistake that was as unchanged as this and it surely was going to cost him his sanity. Because dammit, it hurt like hell!