Chapter 44

Nadia stayed like that for almost ten minutes as she hard his breathings coming from the bathroom, and she thought, what the hell was wrong with this man? At first, she was confused as to why he acted that way? Who walked out on his or her partner at the last minutes, like he did? And that too without any explanation whatsoever? Then she became furious, she didn"t know what his reasons were, but she was so angry.
She felt embarrassed. And then she felt humiliated and internally cursed herself for giving in so easily to his whims. If she had known this is how he would react or treat her just when he knew that she was swarmed with so much desire that she didn"t even know how to take care of, she would never have let them came to this stage. She felt a sting of tears at the brink of her eyes due to anger and hopelessness but quickly sucked it back, she wasn"t going to cry about this.
She looked around for her clothes and while she wore them back, Nadia knew that she couldn"t stop her tears. She felt like a whore, used when he wanted and whenever the will shifted away, he discarded her and acted as though she were one despicable being. Her brain wanted her to think of Hassan and how he never would have treated her this way, but she quickly pushed his thoughts aside, she was thinking about no man today. And didn't Hussain said he had always been in love with her? Was this the way to treat the person you claim to love as much as he did?
She wiped at her tears angrily and stomped out of the rom, bearing it in mind the kind of treatment she"d be giving him from now henceforth. He"d be back, she knew. And he"d try so hard to apologize to her but no, she was never going to forgive him for this. For how worthless he made her feel, she would make sure she hurt him even more than this.
She had to bathe again, because hopefully, it will ease down this ache of need going through her body, and it did. She laid silently on the bed and stared at Baby H that was peacefully sleeping, and no matter how she didn"t want to think about Hassan, she did. And she thought, so, this was how he felt that night when he begged her and she didn"t respond to his needs? If she had known it was this painful, she never would have done that to him, and now, he was no where for her to seek for his forgiveness.
Her tears started as that of anger, pain, and desire, but in a few minutes, she cried for Hassan. She had missed him and would kill to have him back as her husband. She cried so hard that her lungs threatened to suffocate her and she could feel the sting of her eyes whenever she closed them. She truly wished to have him back, because she still couldn"t understand this twin of him. He was a lot of work, a man with lots of complications.
And wasn"t she elated by his confession? She felt as though she were floating in the clouds and were the happiest woman on earth, because Hussain said he loved her, had always been in love with her. And now, she was confused, did he really love her or he had just said that because he wanted her to give in to him? To please him as much as she thought he was going to please her tonight? And it turned out...well, he only wanted to punish her using her body.
And she was never going to forgive him for this.
•
He was glad that it was Sunday, and even though he knew he should stay and be with her at home. Or maybe, make up an excuse about what had happened yesterday at night and try not to reveal what she had done or even acknowledge the fact that they were only an inch from being intimate yesterday and she destroyed everything for them. Or maybe, in her perception, he destroyed it for them. Maybe he could lie about something, make it his reason and just apologize. Not because he"d want to associate with her in that way again, but damn it, he wanted peace to reign. He couldn"t have her asking for a divorce again. Because even though he hated her a bit now, he knew he"d lose his sanity if he ever lost Nadia.
But he couldn"t, because he didn't even want to see her face today. Not in a week or even more. Just the fact that she was married to him was consoling enough, but thinking of all he had done because of her was soul damaging and he didn"t need constant remembrance by seeing her. He ordered for food for them and kept hers in the kitchen because he knew she"d definitely come out to see if she could quickly make something.
And when he checked into the kitchen after some hours, he found that she had taken it and without knowing, a small smile graced his lips. He realized that he may be angry with her, resenting her a bit, but one fact that was as solid as the sun peeking through the sky every morning was; he had loved and will forever love the Nadia. And just the thought enough was comforting.
He wanted to play with Baby H, because it was like the child had a magical power in him that eased his pain as fast as possible but he knew he"d have to go through her before doing that and he quickly dropped the idea. He was so relieved when Nathan invited him for a game night with their other friends at his apartment, knowing so well it will take his mind off things. He wrote a post it note and placed it on the fridge, she will see it, definitely.
•
I got invited to a games night. I'd send a delivery of dinner, so, when the doorbell rings, that"s the delivery."
She wished she were staring back at his face and not this annoying yellow post-it that"s making her rile with anger. Just like that? He couldn"t speak to her? He couldn"t even send her a message like he did yesterday when he needed help-wait, she doubted if the door really had a problem now. He acted as though she were a stranger and she wanted to insult the living daylights out of him. Who the hell did Hussain Alkali thought he was?!
She tore it from the fridge and cut it into pieces before she took the milk she had made for Baby H and took it to her room, shortly after, she heard the doorbell and rolled her eyes. If not because she was so hungry and at the moment, she couldn"t even welcome the idea of cooking, she would have ignored it.
She put on her veil and walked to the door, but when she peeked through the door, it wasn"t a delivery guy, it was a woman. Point of correction, a gorgeous brunette with eyes so blue she could perfectly picture the morning sky, or the sea, whichever suited her mood. She didn"t realize she had opened the door and was openly gazing at her until the woman smiled softly.
"Oh, I'm so sorry." Nadia quickly apologized and ushered her in, "Please, come inside." She said with a smile and pointed at the sofa for her.
The woman smiled lovingly, "Oh, that"s fine. You must"ve been flustered, I told him to call you so you can have an idea who's coming, but your man, handsome as he is, is a bit stubborn." Nadia chuckled at that, even though she surprisingly didn"t find it amusing that this gorgeous woman found Hussain handsome. Was she going to have another Mufeeda in the person of this brunette?
"Trust him to always give one a difficult time." She managed a smile and the woman found a sit for herself.
"My name is Bree Donelson." She introduced herself and lifted her hand, obviously showing Nadia the ring on her third finger. Nadia didn"t know when she sighed and reciprocated the smile. "We recently got married and moved next door few months ago. You must be the wife, right?"
Nadia chuckled and nodded her head, "You make it seem as though y"all have heard enough stories about me."
Bree chuckled, "Trust me, we did. Since after his loss, oh, forgive my manner. I'm so sorry that you lost your husband, his twin brother. Since after that, he was devastated. Some nights, I had to force Nathan to sleep with him here because we were afraid that he might hurt himself or even commit suicide because of how closed he seemed. And then his smile came back, he even called us before he came back and told us that you gave birth to a baby boy-we all know about the baby by the way. It seems like the only thing that kept him alive in those dark days.
"And then, even though he didn"t allow himself to openly be happy at the time, he told us his mother got you two married. But we all knew he sounded different. And his calls became frequent, he smiled more, chatted with us on the phone. Sent us your pictures and that of the baby, he was slowly coming back to his old self and we were so happy. He hadn"t told us that he came back with you two until today-it"s their game night and the men are so loud. So, I got out to have a chat with the wife we all have been dying to meet."
She didn"t know how, but she felt tears dripping onto her cheeks and quickly wiped at them before she crafted a beautiful smile on her lips. "Oh, you made me emotional, Bree. Let me get the baby for you." She heard Bree"s soft smile while she walked into her room and stayed by the door. She cried, because that had only proved one thing she had been doubtful about; Hussain loved her.
She took Baby H and found Bree smiling at the delivery man as she signed the paper on her behalf. "Sorry, I signed the delivery on your behalf, I didn't know you"d be out soon." She placed the pizza on the table and tenderly collected Baby H from her hands, "Oh my god! He looks even cuter in person." Bree exclaimed and kissed his forehead, "Hey, baby! Your godmother here!" They both laughed at the voice she used and Nadia chuckled at the fact that if Sohila knew about this white woman calling herself Baby H"s godmother, she"d throw a fit.
"Let"s eat, I'm famished," Nadia suggested and just like that, she made a friend she had never thought she would and even needed. Bree was the sweetest human she had ever met so far, and she instantly fell in love with her. They chatted, laughed and she couldn"t believe that Hussain had such amazing people as friends in his life. They all were so fond of him.
By the time she wanted to leave, after they had watched a movie and when she noticed that Nadia had been staring at the clock, she chuckled and told her their game nights sometimes ended at dawn but if she wanted she can throw him out of the house so he can come back home. Nadia laughed at that, and Bree didn"t want to be separated from Baby H, she made Nadia promise that whenever she wanted a babysitter, she was always available and for free!
Nadia couldn't fall asleep after Bree had left and it was past midnight. She recalled every word, every touch and every moan made by them and then, like a flash, she heard the words she had no idea she had uttered. First, it was I"m sorry, Hassan" and if her memory was correct, he stiffened at that first. Then she said, Oh, Hassan, please...Now!"
She didn"t know when she jolted to her feet and half screamed into her palms. Ya Allah, just what the hell had she done?!