Chapter 66 Optimistic

After being back almost a week now I haven't let Amelia out of my sight, I can't risk losing her again, I didn't realise how hard I was being on her. I think she's happy that she's with me all the time now though we even more time for her to visit the gym, I couldn't believe how good she was, it's no wonder her agility and stamina were up to standard's they were, and Tara's unique style of play fighting with Damon getting the better of him most of the time but I'm sure he goes easy on her. She would give him a good fight in all seriousness, her speed and tactical side were outstanding, even making it look graceful. most of all it made Amelia happy to just lose herself and forget the world outside for that hour was just amazing it did wonders for her health and mindfulness.

We missed council meeting which Da wasn't too happy about but Amelia did all the work so he wouldn't know anything if he showed by himself anyway. The council were fully understanding why we couldn't attend the meeting but we did submit our paperwork via email and Amelia spoke to them about some of the things were changed and issues present so they could speak on our behalf, which is a very rare occurance but given the circumstances they did, thankfully. The black shadow pack were indeed rejected on their proposal due to lack of support they could give, so as you can imagine they are still angry over the whole ordeal but they have nothing to give and everything to take, the council doesn't work like that. Even smaller packs always have something to give in order to have the unionship we share. So that backfired all thanks to Amelias hard work, Da was also actually pleased too.

Mateo actually made his mark and Libby the same so they are planning their mating ceremony, they don't want anything extraordinary just simple and done and a party after, pack members only so, still large in numbers but not the whole fuss we did, that's planned for Sunday on our next full moon. Something to look forward too, Nathan is still waiting for his mate and gets a little jealous of us, sometimes but he's turning 18 next month so hopefully won't be too long, I hope it's Nikki them too have such good banter and get on so well.

My Da still not willing to give up the title, still angry and bitter at me, I'm waiting for him to turn, I know what I need to do but it's so hard he's the only parent I have left, I have to protect the pack, most importantly My Luna, I owe it to my mother.

Amelia and I spending the day in today she's just getting over her first heat. She's a little sore and tired, I wouldn't be surprised if my seed is well and truly planted in her, not that I mind I mean Amelia carrying my pup is going to to be the most amazing thing I've ever dreamed of, I hope it turns out just like her, my thoughts carrying me away. ***"Lucas your thinking about our pups again aren't you, I know we are both ready but I'm still concerned about the threats we face and whether we would be able to keep our pup safe at the point in time"***. There she goes pops my bubble even though I know she's right, there's so many risks right now, but if there's anyone to protect them it's me and Trent, Nothing out happen to Amelia and that pup I mean nothing anger creeping in slightly. ***"I know Amelia, I just can't wait to see my pup in your arms"*** she leans in to nuzzle herself into me, I know she feels the need too, worry is just clouding her. ***"Is it okay if we go to that big library again I want to search some things about the Alpha's?" "sure if you want why may I ask?"*** I knew exactly why she was asking my mother must have put it in her letter but I can't see any other way. ***"Don't act dull Lucas please, I don't want blood shed"*** I just nod as she turns to throw on some comfy clothes, joggers and a hoodie and some sneakers, she looks adorable effortlessly. I get the keys from the hook I think she prefers the BM to the Ranger.

Amelia asks ***"Good afternoon Grant, here are the books we borrowed last time, where can I find a book about becoming an Alpha, different procedures and so forth"*** she almost whispers. ***"oh my dear and I thought you'd never come back to see me, I must say your Aura is much more magnificent from the last time I seen you, your power is radiating, and your glow thats something else. How are you two keeping find everything you needed?" "Thank you, yeh we did and more, there's more than meets the eye as always" "I agree young one, now what was it you were looking for?" "becoming an alpha and claiming the title" "oh yes, thought you might need something before long, that father of yours Lucas, he's a troubled one for sure."*** okay sore subject he kind of hit a nerve but I'm aware of my fathers demeanour and I can't argue the comment. Grants hands us two books ***"here these should help, it won't be easy either way you do it but these should shed some light and give you some help along the way" "Thank you, we probably be back some time soon."*** Amelia saying our goodbyes, while the words just ring in my ears, troubled, he's not troubled he chooses to be an ass.

Back at the pack house Amelia just cuddled up of the sofa reading while I sat watching TV and doing some pack paperwork inbetween, I hear Amelia's tummy growling, ***"You hungry beautiful I'll order takeout if you like, Chinese for a change?" "that would be lovely thank you baby, the usual for me but add some of the crunchy rolls too" "no problem my queen"*** I order food and head for the shower while we wait for food.

As I pop into the shower and start washing myself I can't help but the thoughts of everything still looming over, even with Roman out the way I still have to deal with Jackson and my Da. Da is going to be a hard one, it's going to be painful, I know Amelia means well but I don't see any other way out of this and to top it off, it's all I have left. Trying to think of every possible solution, perhaps we should just run away and just be free of all the drama and stress just me and Amelia away from it all. *Knock Knock* ***"Lucas are you okay? you can talk to me, I feel the pain too" "everything is fine, just give me a minute I'll be with you"*** I rinse myself off and turn the shower off to everything falling silent, as I look at myself in the mirror I see my mother staring back at me smiling almost giving me comfort as I let the feeling consume me it settles me just enough to sort myself out. When I enter back into the living area I see the table set and food layed out, didn't even realise I was that long. ***"come let's eat Lucas"*** Amelia spoke softly, I nodded and joined her at the table.

***"Lucas I know your troubled at the moment but I am here if you need to talk"*** I know she is and always will be but I'm scared, I'm scared I'm not strong enough to lead this pack, scared I'm not able to make my mother proud most of all I'm scared I may lose Amelia if I can't protect her. All the thoughts keep juggling in my head, before I could stop myself the words came out ***"Let's runaway and never look back"*** Amelia just cocked her head aside, ***"Lucas you know things aren't that simple" "they could be if we did no worries no responsibilities" "Lucas you can't just run away from the problems were facing it's not the answer besides your mother has put alot of time into this pack to make it what it is, you owe her that to keep it running as it should"*** she's right my mother wouldn't be happy if I just left everything behind, I sigh. ***"We will get through this Lucas one way or another."*** shes always so optimistic, me on the other hand am not. ***"how's the book coming, found anything?"*** I quickly derail slightly to clear my thoughts. ***"Nothing really, the usual ways you know but nothing really without an alpha stepping down or blood shed"*** she bows her head, I lift her head ***"if there's any other way beautiful, you'll find it".*** I feel her face warm to my words, this girl has no idea how amazing she is but I need to keep her optimism or we will both crumble.