Chapter 132: Krispin

For the first time, there was a presence greater than the fans during a concert. Even across the stage, I could feel the heat of her gaze. I lived for the screaming worship of the crowd, but during my long months of rehab, I realized I needed to separate myself from their often overwhelming need to have a piece of me. The withdrawal from my drug-induced coma brought back the need for pure music that I threw away in my fanatical need for stardom. Now, I performed for the fans, but I sang for me.
While traveling from one end of the stage to the other, every fiber of my being focused on her. It didn't hurt the music; in my mind's ear, it improved it. I could feel the guys pump up higher with my intensity. In a few weeks, we would begin laying tracks for our next album. It would be better than the last. With our next world tour locked in, nothing could stop us.
Best of all, Angela would be next to me, finally making my life complete. I wasn't sure exactly what it was about her that drew me to her flame, but I needed the burn she ignited.
She stood holding tight to Wade's hand. I loved that she cared about the people in my life and included Wade, Matt and Stephon like the family they were. And God, she cooked, too! Perfection didn't get any better.
Our time on stage finally came to an end. The pleasant exhaustion I felt was deliciously charged with thoughts of fucking Angela all night. I was hoping to last out our new post-sober tradition and not carry her to my room before our down-to-earth session was complete. I thought the boys would understand, but I also wanted Angela to experience all of it.
I pulled her into my arms before taking the towel Wade quickly offered. Moving her away, I led her to a far corner beneath the uncovered rafters of wires and cables. Her lips trembled just before I covered her mouth with mine. I lifted the towel from my neck and looped it over her head pulling her body closer to my bare chest. She smelled fresh and clean and I knew it was unfair to soil her shirt with my still-dripping body, but I didn't care.
With a will of iron, I managed to pull back. "How are you?"
Instead of meeting my eyes, she looked down.
"I'm okay."
I held my frustration back but couldn't help letting her know she lied. "That strap will redden your ass sooner than later. Now give me the truth."
She hesitated. Damn, I didn't want her choosing her words. "I'm overwhelmed."
It could be a compliment but I didn't think so.
"Hey guys, we're supposed to meet the winners of the backstage passes. Save the lovey dovey shit for later."
"You're not invited back to the house tonight." I finally peeled my eyes from the top of her head and looked at Matt.
"Bullshit. It's tradition and would jinx us for life."
"I'm willing to risk it. I'll be over in a moment."
"Yes, boss."
"I'm not letting go of you again. The meet and greet is easy, getting outside to the car is always tricky but I've got you."
"Thank you."
"Are you ready?"
"Yes."
I moved her to my left so I could shake hands and keep my hold tight. Something was wrong but we would deal with it later. I knew my life was chaotic, but she handled herself better than Lydia gave her credit for. Her fingers still trembled but I would fix things when we got home.
The guys were reading Angela's mood and pitched in to run complete interference when we ran for the car. Protective mode strikes again. We all piled into my limo for the ride home, another tradition.
Matt and Stephon had a young blonde sitting between them. She'd visited before and would relieve their post-show sexual insanity when they finally went home. Those two needed to settle down with a woman who could handle the double duo. My own life brought matchmaking to the forefront of my mind and made me laugh. There was a woman out there that could handle them.
When the limo stopped in front of my home, we piled out and the mad dash for the pool ensued. Clothes flew and I caught the first smile from Angela as I dragged her along.
"You don't have to skinny dip if you don't want to," I grinned at her, "but the water helps relax us."
Her shirt came over her head. I was definitely not letting her out of my sight.
"Last one in has the smallest dick!" One of the guys yelled and cannonballed into the water with a splash.
I was the last one in.
Wade got out first and ordered pizza. We all dripped inside after it was delivered. The crew kept extra clothes here and pulled on shorts but remained mostly bare-chested.
We sat on the floor and couches, chowing down, and drinking water and cola. The days of post-show drug and alcohol delirium were far behind us and it felt good.
I grabbed my guitar, then sat back down on the floor and scooted between Angela's thighs. Leaning my head back, I looked into her sad smile where she sat perched above me on the couch. "Name a song."
For the first time that night, her eyes twinkled. "'Because of You.' Tony's version"
It took me a moment and I saw the stumped look on the guy's faces but my memory traveled from my brain through my fingers and hit the right chords. I may have missed a word or two but the intent was clear. "Because of you, there's a song in my heart."
I finished the last note and looked back up to catch one lone tear make its way down her cheek.
"Booooo!" this came from Stephon, "She can't possibly like that shit. I'm grabbing my guitar and playing some real music."
"I'm afraid to ask, but what's his idea of real music?" She tried to hide her watery eyes but I knew.
"Anything with a cuss word. Can you take another hour before they leave?"
"Yes."
It took an hour and a half. Funny how senseless music brought us down from our music high.
"Time to go, fellas."
Matt and Stephon had their own woman for the night and they didn't argue. The rest offered good-natured sexual innuendos but quickly left.
"Upstairs to bed."
Her look of disappointment was priceless. I owed her a spanking but I decided having her hot delectable ass beneath my hand was better than any strap. I needed answers.
I removed her clothes one piece at a time. Then sat on the bed, bringing her down over my lap without a word. Her luscious ass wiggled over my lap but she stayed silent, waiting for my palm to land.
"I want to talk."
Her head whipped around. "Talk?"
"Yes, talk. Something's wrong."
"What?"
"That's what I want you to tell me." My hand traveled over her ass, spreading her thighs so I had better access to her sweet pussy.
"I'm just overwhelmed."
My hand came down, once. "I don't like that word."
Her breath came out in a small gasp. I had no intention of giving her what she really wanted unless she came clean. My hand made small circles on her ass cheek, which now displayed a single handprint.
"I was uncomfortable while you played."
Another quick slap; no harder, no softer. "Hmm, still not good enough." She wiggled some more. "Stay still."
This time it was a huff of air that left her lungs.
"You seem to have a problem with honesty, and for D/s relationships to work, it's more important than anything else. Try again."
My hand smoothed over her flesh again. I wanted to pinch the redness my last slap left behind but I knew she'd enjoy it. Which wasn't in my plans.
"Fuck." Her anger was apparent. "Please, just fuck me, Sir."
"No, because that's what you want. I want the truth. Try again, minus the potty mouth." My hand continued its slow gentle persuasion.
Silence.
I waited, calmly circling her luscious, round derriere.
She huffed once and then went quiet again.
I could stay like this all night.
"I'm fucked up," she said. "Really, I am."
Five quick, hard, rapid spanks.
"Awww!"
"Better?"
"No."
"Well, then keep talking."
Her tears started and my hand moved from her ass to run over her back. I let her cry.
"You don't understand!"
"No, maybe not. But I want to."
"I won't fit in your world." Her breaths were coming in fast gasps.
"You'll fit."
"No, Krispin, I won't."
"So tell me why?"
"I'm a mental case."
I couldn't help laughing. "You've met my friends. You think I care?"
"I take drugs to keep me sane." There was anger in her voice now.
Six this time, three on each cheek.
"I hate you."
"No, I think you love me but it scares you."
"No, it terrifies me."
Six more.
"God, would you just fuck me, please?"
"I don't think so. You're finally talking."
"I hate you!" She slapped the bed with the palms of her hands this time, and her feet jerked as if she wanted to throw a full-out tantrum. "I so fuckin' hate you right now!"
"You need to broaden your speech capabilities."
"Fuck you!"
I just kept making slow steady circles with my hand.
She let loose another huff of air. "I'm not normal!"
"Neither am I."
"You're weird," she said. "But I go crazy."
"We're all crazy." My hand landed twice.
"Not off the deep-end crazy like me."
"I've seen your 'off the deep-end crazy' and it scared the shit out of me, but I'm still here."
"Please, Krispin, just fuck me."
"I plan on it, but only after our conversation is finished."
"It... won't... work." Huge, gulping tear-filled breaths accompanied her words.
I turned her over so I could look into her face.
"It will work," I said firmly, cupping her wet cheek with my palm. "We'll make it work."
"No! Nothing in my life works! Only the constant of the club, and even then, not all the time."
"I'm your constant now."
"Your life is crazy."
"Yep. But I love you. I just need to know if you love me."
Her soft hair floated down against my chest as her body turned to liquid and slumped against me.
"I love the way you smell," I said, romancing her with my voice as I picked up a piece of her hair and ran it under my nose. "I love the way you fuck me."
She giggled; that was good.
"I love the way you walk," I continued, "and watching your ass sway makes me hard."
"You're weird."
"Only to you." I tugged her hair, making her look at me. "Do you love me?"
She tried to turn away but I held tight. "If you don't, I'll just work harder until you do." I lifted my other hand and wiped the tears that began falling again. "We need each other."
"Krispin...."
"And I love the way you say my name."
"Sir."
"That name, too. I need a favor from you."
"If I give it, will you fuck me?"
"Oh, you're getting fucked, regardless."
"Promise?"
"Favor?"
"What's the favor?"
"I need you to go somewhere with me tomorrow."
"Where?"
"I'm not telling you, I just need you with me."
"Okay."
"Thank you." And with no further discussion, I fucked her long into the night.