Chapter 189

My legs felt like jelly as I staggered forward, trying to move towards the mothers who were desperately trying to shield their children from the danger around them. The loud squeak from the hinges of the emergency exit door echoed in the alley as more women and children burst out into the alley through it. They all wore uniformed terrorized looks on their faces. The mothers ran like headless chickens with their children in their arms, often looking back over their shoulders to check if they were being chased.
Their panicked state didn't allow them to think straight or clearly. All they were trying to do was get as far away from the emergency exit door as possible.
It was a dark alley, the only light illuminating the small passage was the dim yellow street lamp a few feet away from the mouth of the alley. I guess most of them never really took the exit before. Most of the mothers looked left and right repeatedly, unfamiliar with the exits and contemplating which direction to go for that split second. A few of them ran the opposite way of where I was standing at the mouth of the alley, oblivious to the wall that was waiting for them at the end of the alley. It was a dead end.
Once they realized that, it was already too late. The door opened once again to show Larry who tripped and fell to the ground. He started crawling backwards, eyes fixated on the gun pointing at his head.
All the mothers watching immediately turned and covered their children from the gun with their bodies.
Quentin's lips were moving but I couldn't hear what he was saying. My vision was getting blurry, preventing me from reading his lips to decipher what he was saying.
Larry stopped crawling backwards eventually, his back cornered to the wall. He switched his strategy swiftly and was immediately on his knees, his hands clasped together as he started to beg for his life.
Again, no sound came from his mouth although it was moving frantically. But I could see the desperation in his red eyes. He was afraid, terrified, of the gun being aimed at his head. More so at the sight of his young son watching them from such proximity.
The two men exchanged some more words. I knew what was going to happen but no matter how much I willed my limbs to move and intercept the following scene from happening, I stayed rooted to my spot, frozen as a mere bystander who could only watch as the incident unfolded.
The deafening bang of the gun going off in the night jolted me awake from the nightmare. The sight of the lifeless body falling sideways, the puddle of blood growing as the substance gushed endlessly from the hole embedded in the man's head was seared to the inside walls of my eyelids. The image greeted me whenever I closed my eyes. It was so vivid that I could practically taste the overwhelming metallic scent of the blood that covered him as he laid on the cold ground. The ringing in my ears were starting to resemble the devastated shrill screams of a woman and a little boy.
As my eyes snapped open, the first thing I noticed was my racing heart that hammered against my ribcage. The sound of my blood rushing in my ears was the only thing I could hear. The shades were drawn, covering the view outside the window. It took me a while to realize that my hands were fisting my duvet covers. I unclenched my fists, letting go of the sheets. The sky was gradually turning a lighter shade of blue as I laid there on my bed motionlessly, causing light to filter into the dark room through the gaps between the blinds.
When I finally decided to get up from bed, the cold air in the room made me conscious of the sweat covering my back. A chill ran down my spine as I patted my damp shirt that clung to my back like a second skin.
My limbs felt as heavy as my head as I trudged towards the bathroom to take a shower. I didn't know what time it was but I didn't think I'd be able to stay sane if I stayed in bed any longer. I kept getting tempted to close my eyes but once I did, the sight that appeared behind my closed lids would cause me to snap them open once again.
I took off my shirt and threw it into the hamper. I stood before the sink and looked into the mirror at my reflection. My hair was disheveled, strands of it sticking up at the back of my head, but what stood out the most was the dark circles under my eyes that marked my sleepless nights lately. It could be the lights in the bathroom but my complexion looked paler than usual, almost sickly.
I turned the tap on and started brushing my teeth before undressing myself and jumping into the shower. I turned the knob to let some hot water rain down on me and steam up the bathroom, raising the low temperature in the small space. The mirror and shower glass started to fog as I washed myself. The shower helped wake my senses a bit, though not by much.
I got out of the shower just when Casey's alarm ring.
She turned off her alarm and sat up on her bed, yawning and rubbing the sleep from her eyes as she squinted at me.
Her eyes followed me as I walked out of the bathroom.
"You're awake?" She asked mid-yawn.
I hummed in response, putting on a hoodie over my shirt.
"I'll make breakfast." I told her, exiting the room and climbing down the stairs to get to the kitchen.
I don't know how long it was after I came down to the kitchen but when Casey came bounding down the stairs, I heard her shriek before I saw her.
"It's burning!" She cried out in alarm as she rushed to my side and turned the knob to switch off the stove.
I looked at the burnt egg on the pan I was holding, finally made aware of the breakfast I managed to ruin.
We ended up opening up the box of cereals and bottle of milk instead.
"What's up with you? I've never seen you so out of it before." Casey asked as she slurped on her milk while watching me.
I raised my eyes to meet hers, my eyebrows shooting up to my hairline at her question. "Huh? Oh." I shrugged, trying to brush it off.
I didn't know what to tell her. That I was having nightmares because I witnessed a homicide?
I wouldn't know where to begin with that story.
Casey looked at me expectantly despite my attempts at dismissing her questions.
"You almost never wake up before I do, you always take your sweet time to get out of bed and cause us to be late almost every other day and yet you finished showering when I woke up this morning." Casey pointed out.
I shoved a spoonful of cereal into my mouth even though I didn't have much of an appetite just to avoid responding to her deductions.
I checked the time on my phone and made a surprised look. "Oh, well would you look at that. Speaking of being late, we're late."
I stood from the table and dumped the remains of my uneaten breakfast down the sink and rinsed my bowl before placing it in the dishwasher.
I rushed out of the house without waiting for my detective sister, rushing to the car hurriedly to avoid any more of her interrogation.
When she got in the car, not without throwing me a look that said she was suspecting me, I quickly turned on the radio to drown out whatever questions she might have thought of asking me during our ride to school.
As the music filled the car, Casey seemed to willingly let me off the hook after seeing my pathetic attempts in trying to dodge her prodding questions as she fell into silence.
I didn't really listen to what was playing on the radio. Turning it on was more of an indirect request I made to Casey to drop what she so desperately wanted to know than anything else. But more than that, I was hoping the noise would drown out my thoughts and distract me from the images that have haunted my nights for a while now.
That proved to be futile when Casey yelled my name loudly, causing me to stomp on the brake pedal. My hand shot out to my side to prevent Casey from lurching out of her seat and hitting the dashboard.
Fortunately, her seatbelt caught her before she got hurt. Angry beeping horns resonated from the cars behind us at how abruptly the car had halted. The red-light countdown started and pedestrians crossed the street as I exhaled a breath of relief.
Casey turned to me with wide eyes. "Bry!"
I raised my hand, keeping my head plastered to the wheel as I let my heartbeat slow down to its normal pace. The small fright I got had jumpstarted the organ and made it feel like it had lurched into my throat.
"Sorry," I managed to choke out as I swallowed with my dry throat.
"Are you alright?" She asked, a hand on my shoulder.
I nodded against the steering wheel, still keeping my head down for a moment longer.
When I finally raised my head, the light turned green. I lifted my foot off the brake pedal and the car lurched into motion once again.
I clutched the steering wheel and kept my train of thought on a leash this time to make sure that it didn't wander off again whilst I was driving.
Casey didn't say anything for the rest of the way and I was grateful. I felt guilty enough about putting her in danger, I didn't feel like answering her questions anymore.
"You sure you're okay?" Casey made sure one last time before she stepped out of the car.
"Yeah, I'm just tired. I couldn't sleep that well lately." I wasn't lying.
Casey nodded. I knew that she wanted to know more but I guess she decided to hold herself back.
"I'll see you after school then."
I nodded, smiling at her briefly as she stepped out of the car and closed the door, walking towards the school building. She looked back once again and gave me a small smile and a wave that I returned.
I stayed in the car for a moment longer, trying to get a grip on myself before I start the day.
Maddison and the boys were already waiting by the stairs that led into the building like any other day.
When they caught sight of me, they waved me over. Maddison greeted me with a smile and a side hug.
Maybe it was the effects of being in love but seeing her made me feel slightly better. Being glued by her side, arms wrapped around each other made me feel like I was inside an impenetrable soundproof bubble.
Maddy tilted her head to look up at me as she wrapped both arms around my waist.
My eyes stayed on Maddy the entire time but I could feel the boys scrunching up their faces at our PDA but no one even bothered protesting anymore. They all knew that it was useless; no – they knew that they've done worse PDAs that Maddy and I had to bear with.
Compared to these man-whores, our PDAs are considered PG-13. At least we didn't make out in the halls with an audience catcalling and whooping at us.
Maddy's eyebrows scrunched together the longer that she observed my features. "You don't look so well, Bry."
That was my cue to break eye contact. I laughed the comment off, turning my head to look elsewhere. "Thanks, babe. No one can look perfect every day you know, unless they're God or something." I joked dryly.
I flashed her a smile that I hope was charming enough to throw her off my case and laugh along with my joke.
Maddy gave me a small smile, "You know that wasn't what I meant." Despite the smile, I knew Maddy wasn't letting up. Her eyes stayed fixated on my face, scrutinizing every detail.
"Come on, love, you'll wear my face out if you keep staring at it so intensely." I threw in another joke as I met her eyes again to lighten the mood up.
Maddy's eyes held mine and I gave her a smile to show her that I was okay.
She was like a K9 dog when it came to my well-being. There was never a time when she failed to sense whenever I needed some comfort.
Maddy's hands that were already wrapped around my waist crept up to my back and patted it.
The thing that I like most about Maddy was that she never asked me any questions. She just offered me a shoulder to cry on, comforted me, and waited for me to open up on my own.
I hugged her back properly and rested my chin on her head as she pressed it against my chest. I closed my eyes to hide the tears that were welling up without any prior notice. I breathed in and out several times before I finally managed to keep my emotions in check.
When I finally felt okay again, I slowly pulled away from Maddy and gave the crown of her head a small kiss of thanks.
She offered me a smile. Her eyes were still swarmed with her concern for me but I knew that she won't pry anything out of me. At least not anytime soon.
The bell rang, signaling the start of first period. The last wave of students entering the building ushered us to follow the crowd and head to our respective classes.
I gave one last smile towards Maddy before we got separated in the sea of students.