The Changes

**ZERO**
Despite my focus on the woman lying in the bed, I continued to talk on the phone. Getting some shut-eye isn't an option for me because I’m working on something important. It's still very early. I took a look at my pricey timepiece and realized it was already ten o'clock.
I wanted to go down to take some hard drinks to get myself to sleep but I can’t just let Isla alone here.
“I’ll get back to you, tomorrow,” I said and ended the call. I perched on top of the bed and heaved a deep sigh.
I've been having a difficult time coping with my activities these past few days—which is atypical of me. I always deal with it swiftly but when I started to be with Isla, it seems like, something has changed.
I took a deep breath and sighed. “What did you do to me?” I whispered into the air as I stared into her face.
“You’re just a sister to me. It will only stay that way…” I mumbled. I stood up and walked towards the bathroom. My body needs a cold shower, to awaken my soul and shove me away from stupid thoughts.
When I’m done, I wrapped the towel into the lower part of my body and stepped out of the bathroom. When I lift m face, I was surprised. But didn’t show it and casually walked toward the bed. My eyes are still fixed on hers.
“You’re awake,” I muttered as I sat beside her.
I saw how she bit her lower lip when her eyes darted into my half-naked body. I formed a sly smirk on my lips.
“Just take a rest. Let’s get back to the city first thing tomorrow,” I informed which makes her forehead crease.
“A-Are you not gonna wear your c-clothes?” she asked, her voice stuttering.
I arched my brow as I leaned on the headboard and my eyes moved down to meet her gaze. I tapped my lap. “Come here,” I uttered.
I thought she won’t do it but I was wrong. She fixed her hair to one side and pushed herself up and sat on my lap, her body lying horizontally.
“I can’t sleep if I wear my clothes on. I always sleep by only wearing a boxer,” I said which makes her roll her eyes.
“I don’t ask about it,” she muttered, and I want to laugh at her reaction.
Isla is a truly endearing lady who never fails to bring a smile to my face—a smile that I only show in front of her and not in front of other people. There were instances when I smiled at other people but never gave them a sincere smile in return.
I’m only like this because Isla and I came to conclude that, the bond we’ve agreed on, was the one who’s making me like this—or maybe the fact that she’s like my younger sister.
But whom did I fool? … Myself. It’s so foolish to me to think that I am treating her differently because I see her as my sister when in fact, I saw him like my woman—fuck it, Zero, I cursed myself.
No, I shouldn’t feel this way, I thought.
I don't want to endanger her life in any way. I don't want to do anything that will hurt her.
I'm not worthy of that foreign affection. I am unlovable and unworthy of love. I am a monster and I will always be. An angel and a monster can’t be together. Not… ever.
“I’m too lazy to take a shower,” she uttered, suddenly which pulled me back to my right senses.
I smiled. Damn, again!
“Don’t worry, you still smell like a baby,” I teased—well, it’s true though. She has a baby scent that no one can’t resist.
And to hide her embarrassment, she rolled her eyes at me. She always does that when she feels embarrassed—that’s what I observed. We may not be together always, but still, I can read her through her actions.
As time goes by being together with her, I will admit… Becca is right all along. Isla has a big heart and a soul that will enlighten those people like me. But it’s already too late. I can’t return to the past and change it.
However, when that one day will came, maybe, letting go will be the best choice.
I smiled at her which makes her squint her eyes. “Do you want to find some drink downstairs?” I asked. However, she shook her head and told me that: it was fine.
“I just want to sleep again,” she said and yawned. How adorable, I thought.
I don’t know why she looks so exhausted when in fact, we just had one round. She closes her eyes and I let myself, run my fingers into the strands of her hair—combing them down.
After a few moments, I felt her stable breathing, and I knew that she was already asleep. Seems like she’s not lying. ‘Who will sleep with that span of seconds?’ I thought to myself.
-
ISLA
We haven't seen each other in three days. Worst of all, he never even attempted to get in touch with me. Zero's absence from my life has made my days tedious. And it irritates me much more since he appears to be doing it on purpose. I giggled at the thought that our antics that night were an indication of our growing distance from one another. Disintegration? The two of us are not even dating.
I've tried numerous times to reach him, but I'm unable to get through. Up until now, I had just finished up a date with my brother. The dinner conversation with my brother was the last thing I expected Zero to inquire about.
Even if I'm not, I sound like a clueless girlfriend. I feel like my mind is going to explode because of all the thoughts that are bouncing around in there. Overthinking has made it impossible for me to focus at school.
I'm sitting alone in the cafeteria now, eating a snack. What's the point of being all by yourself? In the absence of Becca and Zero's approval, I was unable to form a relationship with any other students. Like, what does that mean?
Drinking my mango milkshake and eating the sandwich that I'm carrying, I sipped my straw slowly. After a few minutes, I left the cafeteria and headed outside.
I caught a glimpse of my wristwatch as I walked down the hall. After my last subject, I'll call it a day. On the second story of our building, I climbed the stairs and entered the classroom for my last subject.
It just took a few minutes for the professor to arrive and begin the lecture. During the one-hour class, we did nothing but listen. In the end, the professor let us go fifteen minutes before our scheduled end time.
On the way home, I called a cab once more and bought some cup noodles from the convenience store across the street. Since I haven't gone grocery shopping yet, I don't have a lot of noodles in my cupboard. Apollo might join me on Saturday if I ask him to buy my groceries.
A hand stole my bag just as I was going to grab it from behind, and I startled and wrinkled my brow in surprise as I turned to look at the person who had just snatched it.
“Z-Zero?”
For Pete's sake, it was Zero.
“What are you doing here?” I asked and let him carry the bag as I started to walk and exited the store.
As I made my way farther into the condo complex, my speed was matched by Zero. My brow furrowed as a result of my shock, disbelief, and perplexity.
“How’s school?” Zero asked which makes me glance at him.
“Good,” I simply replied.
Zero nodded when I took a glimpse of him in my peripheral vision.
"I'll tell you what, Zero. You have the appearance of a mushroom. "You're showing up unexpectedly," I said, but I didn't give him a second glance as I spoke. I pressed the elevator button, and as soon as it opened, I walked inside, with him following close behind.
"I need to get things straightened up at my company. And do I have to disclose everything that I'm doing?" he inquired, prompting me to look him in the eyes.
I made a frowning face. “No—”
"Then why are you nagging me as if I'm your boyfriend?" he inquired. "I'm not your boyfriend."
Oh, no, I'm doomed, I thought to myself. This is quite embarrassing.
I just turned my head aside and pretended that I didn't feel any embarrassment. "What if my brother comes to visit me? That is why I expect at the very least your schedule, or that you would at least text me—"
“Fine. "I'll take care of it next time," he added in an unexpected interruption.
I drew my brows together and crossed my arms in front of my chest to show my seriousness. "You're not required to do so. "You're right, it appears that I've lost track of where I am—"
"I don't want this kind of discussion," he interrupted me in the middle of my thought.
After that, I just sighed deeply and didn't say anything else.
When we finally get into my unit. I instructed him to place the bag of groceries on the table above the table. When I finished, I set my tote bag on the chair and began to take out the items that I had purchased from the convenience store.
"Can I have some water?" he asked, causing me to come to a complete stop in mid-air. I nodded, pressing my lips together.
I'm not sure what it was, but I could sense the uneasiness between us. "Inside the refrigerator, there were bottled waters. Feel free to get one, please,” I murmured, and then I went back to what I have been doing.