Chapter 105
After renting a hotel room, I spent the rest of the weekend waiting, thinking of Alyssa. I knew what I wanted to say to her, but had no idea how I was going to say it. A million things ran through my mind, wondering what she had been doing all these years, and if she was married. Rage filled me as I thought of her leaving me and marrying some other guy. Somehow, since I saw her at the party and found out she was alive, the thought of her marrying someone else had never crossed my mind. What if she was married to the guy she was with at the party?
I shook my head to clear the images.
I thought of going by my old apartment with the guys, but I knew that they probably had moved and I had no desire to see them. After all, they didn't even try to contact me over the years. And other than them, there was really no one in Nashville that I would consider a friend, and all of the offices everywhere were closed for the weekend. It was too cold to swim and I thought of going Christmas shopping, but the only thing I could think about was Alyssa. So, I spent most of my time at the hotel, wondering what I was going to say to her and how I was going to say it. My mother and my father both had called several times, but I didn't answer, letting them leave a message instead. I had no desire to speak to them if they knew that she was alive all this time and didn't tell me.
When Monday morning finally came, I dressed in a gray suit with a white shirt and drank a cup of coffee. Then, I hurried out the door and drove to her office. It was only seven o'clock in the morning, but I couldn't wait to see her. As I sat in the car and waited for the clock to roll around outside of her building, I felt like a stalker as I watched the sun rise and people start venturing inside, carrying cups of coffee, headed to work.
Then, I saw her. She was dressed in a red dress suit and wore matching high heels. Her sun streaked hair was full and smooth, falling just below her shoulders and then curved under at the ends. She carried a cup of coffee in one hand and a briefcase in another as she approached the building. Another man in a business suit, carrying a briefcase, held the door open for her. She thanked him and flashed him a smile that gripped my heart, and then walked into the building. The guy checked out her ass as she walked past.
I gave her a few minutes, and then hurried across the street and into the building, and headed toward the elevator. The door opened and I stepped in, along with a few other businessmen. My heart pounded against my ribcage as the elevator lights signaled that another floor had gone by, stopping periodically to let out a patron. Finally, the elevator stopped on the eighteenth floor.
I stepped out, walked straight to her office, and opened the door. An older woman with white hair that fell into a bob just above her shoulders raised both eyebrows. She appeared to be the no-nonsense type-and beautiful with a great figure, despite her age. "May I help you?" she asked, very professional.
I let out a deep breath. "Yes. I'm here to see Alyssa Collins."
The woman nodded. "Your name?"
I shook my head. "I don't have an appointment, but if you could tell her that "
"I'm sorry, but Ms. Collins is booked up for the day," she said, cutting me off. "However, if you'd like to make an appointment "
"I'm leaving for New York tomorrow," I said. "Please tell her that "
"I'm sorry, sir, but I cannot do that," the woman said firmly, raising her voice. "But if you'd like to make an appointment "
Frustrated, I let out a deep breath as I hurried past her and opened the door to Alyssa's office.
Alyssa stood up immediately as I entered the room, nearly spitting out her coffee when she saw me enter. "My God. Logan! You're here!"
Her receptionist followed me in. "I am sorry, Ms. Collins, but this man barged past me "
Alyssa held up her hand to stop her. "It's all right, Mrs. Farrow. I'll take it from here." Her face suddenly turned pale.
Mrs. Farrow took her in, her eyebrows narrowing in concern. Then, she looked at me and frowned. "Are you sure you don't want me to call security, Ms. Collins?"
Alyssa shook her head and sat down, looking as if she were going to pass out. "No, Mrs. Farrow. Please leave us."
The elder woman nodded reluctantly. "Very well, then."
"And cancel my appointments for the day," Alyssa added.
Mrs. Farrow nodded and then walked out the door, giving me a dirty look. "I'll be right outside if you need me."
Alyssa forced a smile. "Thank you, Mrs. Farrow."
The woman quietly and discreetly closed the door behind her.
"Logan," Alyssa said as she rose to her feet. "It's so good to see you again."
"Cut the bullshit, Alyssa!" I said, taking a step closer to her. "Why did you let me think that you were dead all this time? Do you know what I've been through?"
"Me? You thought I was dead?" she asked as anger suddenly flooded her face. "Logan, I wanted to ask you the same thing! Why did you let me and all of your friends and associates think you were dead for the past ten years? Shit! Even your agent thought you were dead! Logan, I had no idea you were alive!"
"What the fuck are you talking about?" I asked, stopping myself from stepping closer. "I was told that you were dead and that your body was cremated! I didn't even have a grave to go to, Alyssa! Do you know what that did to me?"
