Chapter 44 - What Makes Me Special?

Although everyone was aware that Raymond found himself a wife, he had not mentioned it to Lilith since the confession. Lilith was not sure how long Raymond could hold off on getting married to someone but she hoped that it would be at least a few months. At least. Has there ever been a King that had a girlfriend for a couple of years? No, there wasn’t. Lilith wanted to take things slow but she was not sure how much time they had before Raymond needed to get married.

If he was still a Duke, then they could have had all the time in the world. Even with history changed, Landon was still a big problem. But, if it were the entire nation or her relationship, she knew which one she would pick. The past changed for the better. Lilith had to believe that in order to not get too upset by her current situation. Nationwide poverty will be prevented. Kathalé was hit the hardest and Lilith prevented all of that. Compared to that, her relationship was nothing.

One afternoon, Raymond had just returned from going to a meeting with some of the high ranking officials of the country, including Harvey Dunton, when they were approached by a woman. She wore a floor length light pink dress with puffy sleeves and her hair was wrapped up in a bun. She had every kind of jewelry on and the way she carried herself told Lilith that that woman wanted Raymond and nothing more. Here we go.

“Your Majesty.” she called out to Raymond, stopping in front of him.

Raymond just looked at the woman, clearly bothered by the fact that she decided to stand in his way.

The woman stood tall as she addressed the King, as if she expected him to be affected by her. “Your Majesty, I am Gwenadien Frenchmand of the Frenchman family and I also met with you when you were looking for a Queen not so long ago.”

Raymond still didn’t say anything, but his face screamed, “And?”

“Although I am aware that you already picked someone, I wanted to know why I did not get the chance to be picked. Your Majesty, would you bother telling me what it was that did not make me as desirable as the other woman you have chosen. I come from a noble family, one of the richest in the country, I have a high education and am well versed in all social and political problems in this country.”

Lilith shifted uncomfortably. All of that was true. Now that she had mentioned it, Lilith remembered her from the meetings. Raymond barely paid her any mind. Yes, the woman did try to take a jab at Lilith, but other than that, she was gorgeous, smart and would make a far better Queen than Lilith ever would. And next to Raymond, she looked ten times better than when Lilith did.

Raymond thought about whether he should respond or not. This woman really had the nerve to come all the way to the castle to ask him such nonsense. What exactly did she want? For Raymond to realize that he made a mistake and pick her? Or did she just want closure?

He looked back at Lilith for answers but she was looking down. Scrunching his eyebrows, he was tempted to take a step towards her to figure out why, but they had company so he could not do that. Was she bothered by this woman? Had she been one of the ones who messed with her? That thought made Raymond’s jaw clench.

“Is that all?” he asked her.

Gwenadien cleared her throat. “Yes, Your Majesty.”

“Good. You are not allowed back in here.” he did not spare her another glance as he walked past her.

This was not the first time that had happened but it was the first time it bothered Lilith that much. All the other women were not as calm as Gwenadien. There was always an air of desperation and raging jealousy, as if they were going to lose something really big if they could not get Raymond. They had deluded themselves so much that they could not accept reality. It was sad. And all over a man too.

And although Lilith was the one to charm Raymond, she still could not help but think that she would never be able to live up to the nobles who have been trained for this sort of thing. And the fact that they were pretty was just another blow to her pride.

As they entered Raymond's office, he slowed his steps and turned to her. “Is there a problem, Lilith?”

“How long have you had feelings for me?”

It was a question that stunned the both of them into silence. The split second thought came out of Lilith’s mouth without her even fully forming it. How foolish.

Raymond is not sure when exactly his feelings started but he was sure that it was before he became the King. “Earlier in the year maybe. Around the time of my father’s birthday I would say.”

How long ago had that been? Had he really liked her all that time. That didn’t make any sense to her in the slightest. What had she done to spark such attraction? Was it because she had been bold enough to actually argue with him? Or was it that she spoke and acted differently to everyone and therefore he was attracted to her uniqueness. In that case, was his attraction genuine or was it just him branching onto something, anything, that was different in his life.

“And what is that? Why do you like me? What’s so special about me? Compared to all the other women that we have come across, I’m a bit bland don’t you think.” A bit of Lilith’s insecurities were showing out in that statement. In the past- or future, whatever- she had never had the best luck with people liking her. Maybe she had set her standards too high and expected to get picked up by the richest, hottest guy in the world and have them serenade her with gifts. But in Lilith’s opinion, and from what she’s seen happen to other people, she didn’t get anything special.

Raymond smiled a little. Had the woman really bothered her enough to have her ask such a question. It was nice to see her looking vulnerable when he knew her to be very headstrong. He liked that he made her like this. Because she made him like that too.

“You make me feel real.”

The statement was so straight forward that Lilith's heart did not catch up fast enough and therefore skipped a beat. She blinked in stupidity as she took in what Raymond just said. She made him feel real. Now that was something she never expected anyone to say to her. Nothing in the books she read could top that. Sorry Augustus.

“I like that you talk to me as if I am just another person in this world. Of course, at first, I didn’t like it, but now, I just might not be able to function without it. I like that you have such a deep love for books and the conversations we have about it are something I look forward to. I like that you are not afraid to state your opinion around me. And, I like that you always seem to be having a little party in your head.”

“Party?” Lilith could barely breathe with all that he was laying on her but that last sentence caught her.

Raymond folded his lips to keep them from stretching. “You’re so caught up in your own little world that you don’t even notice. Well I do. All the times you make little comments and laugh to yourself or the times I catch you singing the strangest songs, but you seem to be having so much fun that I can’t find the will to stop you.”