Chapter 109: Tahr

I miss Pepper terribly. She has stayed away for a month. Bastian and Laryn informed me that their mates are helping her. I should be angry, but I'm actually relieved. I don't want Pepper alone.
My thoughts are all over the place. I miss Meagan so much and I will admit to missing Pepper just as badly. It makes no sense. She has been in my life for such a short time.
It's after midnight and I've given up trying to sleep. Each night is longer than the last and I can't control my heart any longer. I need my mate. I know I hurt her. I'm hoping that charcoaling my face and giving her time has dispelled some of her anger. A broken heart is different. I saw it in her eyes and I have no idea how to fix it.
I gave her away.
She won't come to me so I go to her. Pepper doesn't fly out of Sarn's castle as I half expect. I shift on the perch and enter the bedroom. She's sleeping. I stay still and take time to admire her beauty. Her headpiece is waiting at home and for just a moment I wish I'd disposed of it. I find her far prettier without it. She moves beneath the covers and I inhale sharply when her eyes open and go from green to a brilliant yellow.
I don't give her a chance to yell at me. "Please just let me say what I've come to say and then I'll leave." I'm relieved when she stays still. "The last thing I wish to do is hurt you further, but I need to be truthful. I'm not sure how to love. I cared deeply for Meagan. She told me she loved me many times, but never asked if I reciprocated her feelings. I care very strongly for you, Pepper. I cared to a lesser degree before I found you in the dungeon. I asked Henry about you because I missed having you hide within my rooms and watch over me. Your presence comforted me when I needed it most." I exhale slowly, relieved she's listening. "I gave you to Mikael because I couldn't control my desire. I gave my word to never touch a human within my keeping if it wasn't my bride. I was confused and also thought I owed Meagan's years of my own heartache for all she gave to me. I was wrong. Meagan only ever wanted me happy. I've spent these last few weeks sorting my thoughts." Tears slide down Pepper's face. I'm hurting her even more, but I must get everything out. "My uncle is the cause of the curse. I am the last silver dragon and I alone should have paid for what he did. So many have suffered because of a silver dragon. I'm ashamed of my color and hide it behind walls of arrogance." I inhale shakily and continue, "You should hate me. I just needed you to know that I care as much as I am able." My eyes water, but I hold back tears because dragons don't cry, they don't love, and they don't forgive themselves. "Goodbye, Pepper."
I turn away relieved that I was able to say what is in my heart.
A sweet telepathic voice chirps into my head, "I have enough love for both of us, Tahr. Please don't leave me."
A strangled sound leaves my throat before I can speak properly. "I don't deserve your love, Pepper."
A small smile curves her soft lips. "No, you most likely don't, but you can earn the right, Tahr. Stay with me or I will blast you with dragon fire again. I've been practicing."
Yellow sparks dance from her eyes. She sits up and the cover slips to her waist. Her bare breasts with their small pointy nipples tempt me so. She lifts her arms and I can't resist. I cross to the bed and pull her into me. This is where she belongs... where I need her to be. I do something I've wanted to do for so long. Lifting my hand, I very gently caress her bare scalp. Her shining yellow eyes grow uncertain. I kiss the top of her head and continue placing light kisses over her skin until I meet her lips. She is mine.
I pull the cover completely from the bed and press my lips to hers. She sighs into my mouth as I move over her body and gently lay her back against the mattress. She's so soft. And my cock is so incredibly hard.
"I need you badly, Pepper. Need you in my life and in my bed. Let me make love to you, please."
"Don't stop," comes her breathy response.
I push away slightly so I can touch her breasts. I need her... want her desperately. And it's past time I claim my mate. I dip my head and gently suck one nipple into my mouth. She is sweet and luscious, spicy and earthy. I move to her other breast and a sigh escapes her lips. It's a sound I never dreamed to hear.
I glance up and our eyes meet. Hers spark with a bright yellow glow and I'm entranced by their beauty all over again. I make a husky plea, "Are you sure, Pepper?"
"I love you, Tahr."
I'm humbled. She deserves so much more than I will ever be capable of giving her. She raises her hips and all thought but that of making her mine ends. My cock is nestled between her thighs ready to explode. I fight for control. I push slowly within her waiting warmth and hit the barrier of her virginity. She moans and I freeze. I should have prepared her-made this better, thought more about her pleasure.
"Don't stop," she begs.
I should be begging her.
I push forward again and break the barrier. Her fingernails dig into my back and a strangled cry replaces her moan.
We are one-mated. This lovely woman will fly by my side as dragon for all eternity. I'm coming undone and I can't fight the need to complete our union. I pull almost entirely out before spearing her again. The magic we carry grows. Hers ripples in shades of yellow and mine silver. She's beyond beautiful and I'm overwhelmed with her love. Her inner muscles clench my cock in a crescendo as her orgasm sets off mine. We burst into a shower of flame that lights up the room.
"Tahr, oh, Tahr," she shouts. It's the first words she has ever spoken aloud to me and I will never forget the sound of my name on her lips as our union is sealed.
I take her sweet lips and kiss her until the ripples of ecstasy fade. We remain bathed in the different shades of light. Pepper lifts her hand and twirls her finger through the colors surrounding us. She laughs and I love the sound. I capture her hand and bring it to my lips. I lick her knuckles before kissing them.
"I've missed you," I sigh against her hand.
"I've missed you too."
"Come fly with me. I've dreamed of it every night."
She laughs as we launch from the perch. Our bodies continue to glow and my cock hardens once more. I ignore it for a time. I really want to fly with her. Ashrac told me she was uncoordinated and had no control of her fire. That's all changed. I only wish it was me who taught her the complexities of being dragon. I refuse to allow my thoughts to ruin our mating flight. She is mine. I guide her from Sarn's territory and lead her home.
"Your thing is sticking out," she says in an impish voice.
I've been fighting my need since we left. No more. If she wants me, who am I to deny my mate? I rise higher and she flies ahead of me slightly. Coming from above her, I curl my front claws at the seam where her wings meet her back. I push down while flapping my wings so we land with only a slight jolt. I rise up and clamp my back legs around hers. In dragon form, I take my mate. Her cries of pleasure push through my mind. Our bodies still glow and when we explode into flames this time, the purest of dragon fire lights the sky for miles.
I've seen this same explosion from Bastian's and Laryn's realms many times. Fire rolls up my throat and I'm unable to hold it back as my roar goes over Pepper's head. For the first time in thousands of years, all is right with my world.
"Shift," I whisper when I can finally think clearly enough to speak. I need to kiss her again and giant dragon teeth in the way won't work. We kiss and that leads to taking her again. I want to bury myself within her wet heat until the sun rises. She yawns and I'm forced to rein in my lust. "It's late and you need to sleep. Come on, we'll be at my castle in just a short time."
I stand and place my hand out. She doesn't take it. "I'm not returning with you, Tahr."
"What?"
She sits up and looks at me with her bright yellow eyes. "I'm remaining at Sarn's castle. I'm happy here and I need more time."
"Time for what? You are mine."
She shakes her head. "No, Tahr. I belong only to me. I love you and know you care for me. You need time to sort out your feelings too. Time to finish grieving for Meagan. I will wait for you."
"Are you crazy?" I thunder. "You will come with me now."
"Or what? You'll make me? I don't think so." She stands and her shift to dragon throws me back several feet.
"Fuck," I grumble. She's serious. I'm so damned angry. I move farther away and shift. I launch myself into the sky. "You will come begging," I yell petulantly and I may not take her back. She has rejected me for the last time.
***
I last three days before I return to Sarn's castle. I'm angry with my brother dragon for leaving her a refuge. I'm angry at Pepper for forcing me to come here. And most of all I'm angry at myself for being unable to give her the words she wants. She opens her arms and my anger slips away. It only returns when I fly away without her.