Into The Past

Ildi settles in at the end of the bed pulling a blanket around himself shoving one more mouthful of food in before he begins.

*” We grew up in a small pack not far from here, The Golden Sun pack my father was the Alpha up until recently. My father stepped down and handed it over to Ivar”*


“What was is it like, Your home I mean”

*” It was wonderful, the town was small and everyone knew each other. You couldn’t walk a few steps without someone saying hello to you or wishing you well”*


“How many people were part of your pack ?”

*” As I said it is small, or at least it was. The people of our pack were from long generations their grandfathers had served under my own”*

He breathes deeply as he seems to be remembering something.

*” Our lands were ripe with food and they were so green everywhere you walked was beautiful”*

“You talk of it as if its no longer that way”

*” Well, it isn’t. When we were children our father taught us to be brave and to be strong, to be kind and caring and above all to look out for the pack. Their needs should always come before our own. That is the way he lived”*

“You said he handed the pack over to Ivar, where is he now ?”

*” He and my mother returned to her original pack, her father, my grandfather was very sick and very old. She wanted to be with him in his final moments and my father obliged, the two of them would do anything for each other, their mate bond is incredibly strong”*

He once again seems lost in thought and he smiles at himself.

“Why are you smiling?”

*” I’m just remembering them, it has been a while since I saw them, I miss being around them. Their happiness was infectious and I guess I miss my mate too”*

He shrugs it off, tearing open the bag of M&M’s I’m pretty certain he bought for me, chucking a few into his mouth and ushering the bag towards me.

Taking one of each colour I hold them in my hand staring down at them, Ildi told me I should just grab a handful and chuck them in, closing my fist I bring them to my mouth and throw them all in.

*” See I knew you’d get the hang of sweets eventually”*

I chuckle at him and smile, he was right they do taste pretty good.

“Continue the story, I’m enjoying hearing about your parents “


I don’t want him to watch me be weird with new food, it’s becoming a bit of a complex for me, People always seem shocked when I say I haven’t eaten this or that.

*” Okay so after my parents left Ivar took over, at this point, Salvi was with us.”*

“Oh yes she said, Ivar was her mate, she said they loved each other from the moment they met”

He frowns at my words and screws up his nose a little.

*” You have one thing right that they are mates, but it wasn’t all sunshine and roses with them, in fact when Ivar met her he hated her guts”*

“What, what do you mean how could he ?”

*” Seriously he couldn’t stand her, he always said something was off about her.”*
I’m shocked at his words, Ivar hated her ?. When you look at the two of them now you would never know they seem so in love.

“I can’t believe this, it’s crazy. You would never think that about them. What changed ?”

“*Well it was pretty sudden actually, Ivar went to talk to her as she wasn’t really pulling her weight as part of the pack. We all thought he would come back and tell us how he told her off”*

I’m assuming from your tone that didn’t happen”

*” No he came back and told us she was going to be our new Luna instead “*

“This story is a far cry from the one she told me”

*” Yeah they kind of glossed over it after that it was a bit weird, to be honest. When we would ask Ivar what happened, he would always reply that he knew she was his mate he was just being stubborn”*


“I can see him being that way, he’s quite forceful”

*” He’s wasn’t like that before, I guess the stress of running a pack having a new mate and all the things in between got to him, he became stone-faced overnight”*

“Wow, I mean I can’t ever imagine Ivar with a smile on his face”

*” It’s hard I know. Anyway, mum and dad were gone Ivar was Alpha I found my mate and got swept up in my own life. It wasn’t until I came back into pack matters that I realised what was going on “*

Ildi’s tone of voice has changed. He's gone from loving to angry in seconds, even the way he is holding himself at the end of the bed is different. He is rigid and stiff. He clenched his fists, his knuckles turning white.

“Ildi, are you … are you okay ?”

At the sound of my voice, he relaxes, sitting as he was before.

*” It's just when I became the Beta after Salvi accused Ivars best friend of hitting on her. I saw what my pack had become. It was breeding ground for rogues who wanted a pack and Ivar accepted them willingly”*

“You mean, you pack now has rouges in it ?”

*” Yes, I suppose technically they are not rouges as they have been sworn in. We lost good people over the years that followed, Ivar was young and some of the older generations tried to guide him, to make him see. He didn’t want to hear and so they left, most when back to their original packs, taking their families with them”*

“What about your mate? You said you left her there, is she going to be okay”

*” She can stand up for herself, besides her father was a warrior under my own. If they know what’s good for them they won’t even attempt to approach her. “*

“So why did he start calling all these people in, letting them join?”

*” It was just him, it was Salvi too, they would swear them in and then send them out looking for something. I suppose now we know what it was “*

“We do ?”

Rolling his eyes at me he responds.

*” Yes, it was you obviously”*

“She had all those people searching for me “

*” She would obsess about it. She even killed a few people when they came back empty-handed, not exactly Luna worthy but it got the message across”*

“She killed people?”

*” Oh yeah loads. She even convinced Ivar to kill her best friend and Beta for touching her”*


He pauses momentarily, looking down at his hands.

*” Although... I think there is more to that, Ivar would have never killed Josh, he was like a brother to us both, and Josh had a mate, it didn’t make any sense that he would go after Salvi. It still doesn’t make sense, but I guess what’s done is done”*


“I can’t believe she would do that. Well I mean I can. She wants to kill Artemis and I’m not even sure why she really didn’t seem tha..”

I stop myself realising what I’ve just said out loud, I feel the heat rushing through my cheeks as I look up to face Ildi.

“What I mean was erm... She didn’t seem like she would die easily”

He frowns at me once more, raising his eyebrow high as I pray to the moon-goddess that he just thinks he misheard me.

*” Things went pretty downhill from after that, well even more so. And then she found you and here we are “*

He shrugs his shoulders, grabbing another hand full of M&Ms and shoving them in his face.

“Ildi, what happened when he killed Josh?”

I don’t know why but I need to know more about this, for some reason it just doesn’t sit right. Why would he kill his best friend?

For the mate bond? Was his and Salvi’s really that strong, moreover if it is that strength of love, why did my own mate walk away from me so freely, leaving me on the ground.

*” Well there isn’t much to tell. Salvi accused him of following her into the showers after training and hitting on her. Ivar was naturally furious but Josh denied it, they locked him up overnight so Ivar could make a decision. Many in the pack called for Josh and his mate to be banished at least then he could go and live in a new pack with a new name. They would have at least had a shot.”*

“What do you mean by a shot, what did Ivar do to them ?”

*” When he got up the next day he was like a different person. He called for Josh to be brought to him, he banished him and his Mate. Tradition states that the entire pack must walk to banished to the edge of the territory and turn their backs on them once they cross “*

“Wow that’s harsh as if being banished wasn’t bad enough you get shunned by an entire pack too”

*” It’s not supposed to be nice Sekreta, it’s supposed to break the ties with the pack. Josh accepted this, he and his mate walked to the edge. She was allowed to say goodbye to her father, as she wasn’t being banished he would be permitted to meet with her twice a year somewhere off the lands. “*

“That’s something I guess, I mean she didn’t do anything wrong”

*” We all turned out backs if I’m being honest I didn’t want to it felt like I was losing more family but Josh nodded at me telling me it was alright so I did”*

“Ildi are you okay?”

I rush to sit closer to him as I see his eyes fill with tears.

*” I should have turned Sekreta, I shouldn’t have banished him.”*

Light sobs escape from him but he rushes to wipe the tears.

“Ildi what happened, why are you crying”

*” When we turned our backs Ivar did the unthinkable. He attached them both from behind ripping out their throats as Salvi watched. The Alpha and Luna are supposed to oversee the departure not murder them”*

He sobs again as he remembers it all, I can feel the emotions radiating from him. I place my hand on his hoping he can feel the light and warmth, I don’t know if my healing is supposed to be used like this but it feels right. A few moments pass and he seems to stop.

*” How did you do that?”*

“I don’t know, I didn’t think it would work. Are you okay to tell me the rest”

He sits up shaking it off and smacking his cheeks.

*” I’m fine now, I don’t know what came over me. It's the first time I’ve spoken to anyone besides my mate about it I guess it’s just built up”*

“Ildi it’s fine honestly, that’s what friends are for right?”

*” Yes Sekreta, that is exactly what they are for.”*

He smiles sheepishly and then continues with the story.

*” When the rest of the pack heard Ivar, no one dared to turn but there was outrage. For an Alpha to disrespect tradition was unheard of. When he was challenged again by the elders, he simply replied that he did it for their Luna and they should be grateful”*

“That’s awful”


*” It’s not the weirdest part though. I haven’t really spoken to anyone about this before.”*

“It’s okay you can tell me, it’s not like I’m going to tell”
*” I found Ivar A few days later in the middle of the night where he had killed them, he was gripping the ground and sobbing. When I asked him what was wrong he just kept saying, what have I done, over and over. Its sounds silly but when I looked in his eyes I saw the old Ivar”*

“The old Ivar?”

*” The Ivar before Salvi, it was just a second and then she came out and grabbed him ushering inside. As soon as he saw her, he became stone-faced again. It has always baffled me why he couldn’t show that side of him with her, they are mates after all”*

We hear voices outside the door cousin us both to shoot around and look.

“Ildi that might be Salvi, she will kill you for being in here I’m supposed to be asleep how are you going to get out ?”

His eyes shoot to the window as he grabs all the stuff from the bed, he stands rushing over to it pulling it open. He’s halfway out when he stops.

*” Oh yeah I forgot I picked this up when you passed out, it looked personal so I didn’t want anyone to see it “*

He tosses something at me and climbs out, staring down I realise it’s my book. The door handle twists and I shove the book under my pillow and shut my eyes tightly to fake sleep. Everything Ildi just told me is still at the forefront of my mind.



*A/N
Thank you so much for reading.
Be sure to check out my facebook page @KendraSummersAuthor for updates about my stories.