This Life

It feels like hours since I have been walking through this nothing wasteland. I can see why they call it the uncharted lands because there’s not a bloody thing here.

I called out to Selene over and over and she eventually answered me, we must have been closer to one another like a telephone signal finally connecting.

She was still with Ildi and he told me what way to walk, it turns out I am miles away from them both and the walk is mind-numbing.

It’s just made me go over everything again and again. Thoughts of the kiss, him telling me everything and being so open. In another life it would have been a perfect scenario, it would have been almost perfect, getting to know someone in that way.

“Moon Goddess you didn’t make my life easy”

I wrap my arms around myself and continue in the direction Ildi noted.

“Captured and tortured by a crazy person. Met my Crazy sister who I thought had my best interests at heart. Found out I have other family members alive and that my dad more than likely isn’t dead. What a life”

**You know talking to yourself is the first sign of madness **

“As Savea welcome to the party it would have been nice to hear your voice hours ago, you know when I was alone and walking through the woods with nothing but my thoughts replaying over and over “

I let the sarcasm drip out knowing she can feel it inside me as well. She left me for hours, the quiet was almost deafening.

We carry on this way throwing insults back and forth, talking things over. Savea is practically bursting at the seams thinking about the kiss with Ivar, and I am the voice of reason.

Looking at it objectively I just don’t see how this could work between us. How can I be with him when neither of us knows who the real him is.

He said it himself he’s not sure what’s real and what’s not moreover, how could we even attempt to make this work if Salvi is so hell-bent on controlling him.

As I continue walking I hear the familiar voices of Selene and Ildi. There's another voice, a deep powerful voice with an aura that wants to force my head down.

*” MoonGoddess Sekreta there you are! What did the hell happen? “*

She grabs me and pulls me into her embrace, hugging me tightly and asking me a hundred questions. Eventually, she lets me go and Ildi pulls me in for a hug so only this one allows me to breathe and it only lasts a few seconds.

We sit down and Calder’s eyes are fixated on me, I’m not sure if he is studying me out of interest or out of distrust.

“So what happened to you both?”

I’m keen to know how they got here, we are almost to the end of the uncharted lands and I’m keen to know how Calder has ended up in the mix.

Selene tells me about their journey with Ildi chiming in now and then. It dawns on me about halfway through that we made it back here in almost half the time.

After they finish speaking Calder wraps and arm around Selene pulling her in close and inhaling her scent, you can see the love between the two of them.

“How did you make it back here so fast? And Ildi how did you know where I was to give me directions back here?”


**” I've spent a lot of time in these woods, the way you all came before was on the paths but if you divert from them you’ll find it is more of a straight line”**

“ I see and what will you do now we are back, Ildi? We are almost at the edge and Calder has met up with us. I'm assuming others are close by?”

I look to Calder for confirmation that other people are waiting for us at the line, he nods in my direction and pulls Selene closer but his eyes stay on me.

**” Well I’m not sure I don’t think it's safe for me to go back to Salvi and Ivar but I’ve left a lot of people I care about back there. I don’t want them to think I have abandoned them and left them to her will, these people have been with me from the first moment I thought something was wrong with Ivar''**

*” You can come and stay with us. Eventually when this is all over I’m sure that your pack will return to normal, when that day comes you can go back. Until then you are welcome to stay with us”*

I’m taken aback by Selene. I did not for one second think she would welcome him back with us, even though he helped us there’s a distrust there. I still see it in her eyes now and I saw it when he bought us the book.

**I know what you're thinking Sekreta, Why are they welcoming into the pack? It’s simple Selene doesn’t trust him she wants to keep him close**

Savea’s words resonate with me, it would make sense. I do not doubt that there is also kindness behind the offer but Selene and Calder are Alpha and Luna of their pack.

It would make sense that they would want to keep him close and maybe even use him as leverage of some sort. After all, if things were to go south they have Ivars Brother in the grand scheme of things that has to mean something.

After we have told the story of how we all got to this point we start moving again heading for the others and to the cars.

Ildi and Calder walk at the front with Selene and I trailing behind, she's gripping the book of lights on her hand. Neither of us is speaking but there’s a tension there I can tell she wants to ask me something and she’s holding it breaks.

“What's up to Selene, I can tell you want to talk to me, what’s on your mind?”

She takes a deep breath in and steps in closer to me, dropping her head low.

*” I just wanted to know what happened with you and Ivar. Something went down the way you are holding yourself. Your tense and on edge and you have barely spoken a word. So spill it, what happened ?”*

I could tell her everything, tell her she was right and he’s my mate and my sister has him under some weird spell of sorts or…. I could lie, I could tell her she was wrong and there is nothing between us at all and nothing happened.

Before I can even make a choice the words spill from my lips.

“He’s my mate”

She stops and grips my arm tightly holding me in place.

*” He is? are you sure ?”*

“I’m as sure as I can be. He told me in not so many words that Salvi has him under some kind of spell or something. He said when I showed up he would have breaks in it where he would see clearly and feel nothing for her”

*” I knew it, the way he looked at you when he found us after you passed out, it was like there was nothing more important to him in this whole world. I know that look, I’ve seen it a thousand times”*

I watch as her gaze goes over to Calder and her eyes widen at the sight of him there is nothing but pure love and joy there.

“Thing is, I don’t know what to do about it, to be honest. I mean he’s with Salvi and every second that he’s with her he falls deeper and deeper under her spell. It occurred to me when I was walking back here if I have to save him from her, and I have to save myself from her”

*” You're not alone in this, you know. We will be there to help you, my sisters, and will not leave you alone”*

“But how am I supposed to do it, Selene. The book of lights is supposed to help us save Frode and defeat Salvi, but now I have to save my mate and save us from whatever my sister has planned and someone capable of the things she has done is not someone who should be taken lightly. I cannot help but feel we are underestimating her, she must have something else planned “

*” What's got you thinking that ?”*

“Well don't you think it's odd she is going through this much trouble, if she was that powerful why hasn't she just killed me, killed is ?. That attack on your pack seemed like it was just for the show looking back on it. Did it not feel like she was just testing you out to see what you would do or what you are all capable of?”


*” I suppose when you put it like that yes it does. There is one thing I have been thinking about this whole time though Sekreta ..”*

She sounds nervous to ask, like what she is about to say might cause offence to me or upset me in some way.

“You can speak what your thinking, I think at this point there should be no secrets between us”

*” Well I have been thinking a lot about your mother and father Sekreta, do you not think it odd that Salvi would keep your dad from you and more to the point why would he want to stay hidden from his daughter, surely he would want nothing more than to have you back in his arms. Your mother and you were captured and tortured, why would he not reveal himself the second you came back”*

“I have thought about that. Maybe he just didn't want me, or perhaps he didn't love my mother and I as she thought. I have also thought that maybe he had come to terms with the fact that we were dead and found it hard to face me”

*” mmm maybe “*

“That was unconvincing, what are your thoughts?”

*” Well…”*

“Come on, we're being honest with each other, I need your help to deal with this. Anything you think will help I’m sure.”


*” have you thought about the fact that she might not be your real sister?. I mean what if .. what if she is the daughter of Marel ?”*

“Marel?”

*” Yes just hear me out for a second. Is it not strange that she kept saying to you our magic was stolen and didn't belong to us?. She's so convinced that she is going to take it all from us, what if it's not for her but him. You said you remember very little of your childhood with her, do you remember anything at all about your father. Do you remember his voice or his voice ?”*

“I.. well. ItI’veike I’ve said before I remember little bits but I’ve pushed it all aside. I don't remember anything”

*” So it could be the case. She could have been lying to you all along ?”*

“If you're right and it's a big if, why would she lie and go through all that trouble she had me at her house and he was there why would she not just kill me and get it over with?”

*”That's the bit I can't work out. Why?”*

We cease our conversation as cars come into view and I see Artemis running towards me, her arms stretched wide.

There is this weird glowing feeling in the pit of my stomach as she wraps me in her embrace, it is the first time I have ever felt like someone missed me or someone has made me feel like I’m worth something.

**” MoonGoddess I’m so glad you are safe.”**

She pulls Selene in for the embrace.

**” Both of you. Now come on let's get back to the house we have a lot to discuss”**

*A/N
Thank you so much for reading, there will be no update tomorrow but the story will return on wednesday.