Into The Water

Facing off against Ivar was never part of the plan and yet here we are he’s coming towards me and fast. Panic grips my chest causing me to hold my breath.

**Get it together Sekreta we can do this**

Savea’s voice is like music, I stay rooted to the spot and let him keep coming towards me.

“Ivar stop”

His movements momentarily falter but he carries on, I guess I have to dig a bit deeper.

“Ivar you don’t want to do this, we both know it you need to stop “

Nothing. This time he seems to speed up when he is a few feet away from me. I brace myself for the inevitable impact of his body with mine.

Bracing my feet, digging them into the ground ready to fight, my fists clenched. I've no real idea how I’m supposed to fight him but I’m going to try.

His body hits mine like a speeding car hitting a brick wall throwing me backwards as I feel his hand wrap around my neck.

We crash to the ground, my back hitting the floor and ricocheting a few times before the two of us are still. He stares at me and lets out a growl.

I lift my hands to grip his wrist in an attempt to make him loosen his grip on my neck, at my touch his eye flicker and I feel his hand relax slightly, not enough for me to get away but enough for me to take a deep breath in.

“Ivar. Please”

Resorting to begging how very superhero-like of me, at this point it’s whatever I need to do to survive and if Selene is right all I need to do is make him see me and I mean see me.

“Ivar”

He growls again and this time it’s not directed at me it’s like he’s fighting with himself. I don’t know why but I want to comfort him.

Without thinking I lift my hand and gently touch his cheek, he freezes at the touch and I hold my breath. Maybe that was the wrong thing to do?.

A few seconds of silence pass between us and then he leans into my touch his eyes pressed tightly shut. I brush my thumb across his cheekbone letting out the breath I was holding.

“Ivar. Look at me “

He keeps his eyes closed and his body shivers.

“I know you don’t want to hurt me. Just let go “

I growl stirs in his throat and I’m internally willing him to open his eyes. I want to see them and I mean really see them, not see the flashes of conflict.

It seems silly to mourn the loss of something you have never had, but a lump forms in my throat at the realisation of not knowing what his true eye colour is, the sadness that follows is deep but it’s only for a second as in the next breath my hand is being ripped from his cheek.

I meet his gaze to see nothing but empty blackness staring back at me. Any hope I had of convincing him not to hurt me has gone out of the window as it looks as though I'll be fighting my way out of this one.

I lift me by the throat and I grip his wrist as my feet leave the floor, he throws me across the hallway, my head bouncing off the wall causing me to let out an involuntary cry of pain.

I scramble to get back to my feet quickly as Ivars footsteps loom closer to me.

*” You know she is going to have a lot of fun with you”*

I duck out of the way just a claw swipes towards me thankfully only tearing my clothes.

“She is not going to have anything with me because I’m don’t plan on sticking around”

He chuckles but its not like before, it’s cold and empty like the words are not his own.

*” You are so foolish to think that you will ever escape this, to think you will ever truly be free of my mistresses grasp”*

I cock an eyebrow as we circle one another.

“Mistress?. I thought she was your mate “

A growl erupts from him again at the word mate.

“That right isn’t it? Or have I gotten something wrong?. Salvi is your mate, the love of your life, your better half isn’t she?”

*” She is all-knowing”*

**Sekreta. He’s not sure you need to use this. Make him see who she really is, I can feel his wolf trying to fight with him**

Taking her words on board I scramble to think of the best way to deal with this. How can I make him see and keep him under control? He is like a ticking time bomb any second he could attack me and there’s no way I could win against him truly.

“All-knowing. Only the moon goddess is all-knowing, or are you telling me that my dear sister is the reincarnation of the moon goddess Ivar. That seems a little far fetched don't you think?”

He goes to speak, stepping closer to me. I don't know what comes over me but I feel a surge of confidence, like baiting him is the right thing to do. I suddenly want to get him angry.

When he's calm he seems to struggle less with whatever fight he has going on. I need him to try and hurt me again.

“I mean if that's the case then what are you doing here Ivar? If she is the moon goddess and you are her mate then you are a god among men are you not”

This time I don't wait for him to come to me, I move closer to him. It's dangerous and a stupidly chaotic idea but I push myself up against him.

He was frozen in place as I left my mouth to his ear.

“A god who seems to be doing the bidding of a slave.No that can't be correct”

I brush my lips along his earlobe and he shivers but still, he does not move. Circling behind him I drag my hand across his shoulder blades.

I don't know if I'm attempting to be seductive or if I'm enjoying being close to him, his scent filling my nostrils and settling like warmth in the pit of my stomach.

“Mates should be equal and yet here you are. Chasing me alone, where is Salvi exactly, her master plan is being carried out by you and yet she will take the credit”

I backed away from him again, putting distance between us. His eyes are focused on me and his hands are clenched shut, blood dripping from his palms and hitting the ground in melodic thuds that seem to drown out all other noise.

If I thought he had seen him struggle with himself before it was nothing compared to this, he was hurting himself in an attempt to stay calm.

I feel a twinge of guilt and I again want to be near him but this time to wrap myself around him and comfort him. Pushing those thoughts down I refocus on the task at hand.

I need to get out of here and soon. I start to slowly back away from him, his eyes clenching shut. At that exact moment, I made a move and ran for it.

Heading out of the house and into the forest behind, I mask my scent and keep moving. The whole time the incidents with Ivar replay over and over. When I'm around him it's like I become someone else. I'm drawn to him but I hate him.

I want to fight with him and comfort him all at once, I think about when I got close to him. When I whispered in his ear, was that even me?.

I would never do that but being close to him is like an impulse I can't control. I was supposed to stay and convince him not to hurt me and let me go or fight him so he couldn't follow.

The heavy thud of footsteps pulls me from my thoughts as I turn my head around to see him coming towards me and at speed.

I shift into my wolf out of panic and keep running.

“Savea what the hell are we going to do he's hell-bent on catching us and masking our scent seems to not affect him”

**Find water Sekreta and when you get to it dive right in**

“Into the water, what the hell is that going to do”

**Will you just trust me, now run **

I do as she said, sniffing the air and listening for the sound of water. I catch it to the left and I head towards it, Ivar is still at my tail.

I can't hear anyone else though, he hasn't altered anyone else to my being here. Seeing the water's edge I dive in. The water surrounds me but I don't stop to feel the cold.

As my head lifts above water a loud splash comes from behind me. I keep moving fast, the ice taking the breath from me. I was never a very good swimmer and it seems wolf form is no different.

Shifting back to human form in the water painfully aware of just how naked I am, I keep going, the other side of this lake seems so far away and it only seems to get further away from the closer I get.

I don't look back to see how close Ivar is, instead I focus on moving forward until an arm wraps around my waist, gripping me tightly, I'm flung backwards hitting a warm chest, that's oddly welcomed in the cold water.

*” Will you stop running away from me “*

The voice is the same one I heard a few days ago. The softness, the need to hear it more. I struggle and turn to him.

My breath catches and the world seems to stop around us as I stare into his eyes, it's like I'm seeing them for the first time.
“Your eyes..”
I reach up and cup his face in my hand as if to hold him still so I can take all of this in. He scans over my face waiting for me to speak again but I can't be completely captivated by him.

“Your eyes are golden, how have I never noticed that before they always seemed so dark”

Without realising it dawns on me that I have spoken those words out loud and the corner of his lip upturns.
I'm suddenly very aware I am completely naked and in a freezing lake.

I try to pull away but he grabs me tighter.

“Let me go”

*” No you will run away again”*

“I will stop running when you stop chasing”

He's gripping me tightly but I still fold my arms around myself in a desperate attempt to cover myself up.

*”I'll never stop chasing you Sekreta”*

“Why. Why won't you stop and just leave me alone?. You could let me go now and Salvi would never know”

*” I cant… I can’t stop chasing you. It's like an addiction. I'm addicted to you, the way you smell the way you look, your body, your eyes, your smiles all if it drives me crazy and every time I'm forced to chase after you and hurt you my wolf tried to break out and tried to fight it. Everything we have goes towards keeping you safe and fighting the overwhelming instinct to “*

I drop my head at His words, it's what i knew only hearing his pain makes it seem less enchanting.

*” you have no idea what it's like knowing deep inside the person you are with isn't your mate but a force overcoming you, compelling you to touch her to do what she asks when every move makes you feel sick”*

He loosens his grip around me and bows his head.

“Ivar. How are you doing this? how are you able to be you right now, to talk to me like this”

His eyes widen at the realisation.

*” I... I don't know. It happened when I got in the water it's like whatever hold was on me broke away”*

The two of us stare down at the water as if to look for whatever could have done this, what could have broken whatever hold he was under but there is nothing I decide to ask a different question instead.

“What did Salvi do to you?”