Reminiscing..
VIOLET
Words, I think, have a way of lingering far longer than they should. They don't fade like bruises or heal like cuts. They cling to the mind, echoing long after they're spoken, finding their way into our thoughts until they're impossible to shake. It's funny, really, how a few simple sentences can hold more power than anything physical. No weapon can ever cut as deep as a word meant to wound. No wall can protect you from the things someone says.
Words don't just go away. They settle in you, making a home there, growing heavier with time. The more you try to forget, the more they seem to stick, like stubborn shadows refusing to leave no matter how much light you throw at them. And the worst part? You carry them with you, these invisible weights that no one else can see but you feel every day. You bury them down, try to ignore them, but they stay. They always stay.
Always hiding behind those stupid books, acting like you're smart whereas you aren't. You don't even have the guts to speak your mind. You just sit there,never standing up for yourself,never speaking your mind. What's wrong with you huh?
You don't even know who you are.It's pathetic
I gulped hard,took a few breaths to steady my breath. It's been hours since he left and I'm still stuck to the couch,the book I was reading laid forgotten on the floor. My eyes burned, and I blinked rapidly, fighting back the tears. His words played over and over, like a broken record stuck on repeat.
He didn’t mean it. He was upset. Something else was bothering him.
I kept telling myself
That has to be true right? because there was no way he'd lash out at me..for absolutely no reason.
I hugged my knees to my chest, staring blankly at the floor. I tried blocking out his words but they were loud,louder than the quietness of the room
You don't even know who you are
How many times have I heard the voice in my head? It wasn't just him. It was my own voice screaming the same insecurities. And now he had found them,and laid them out bare for me to see.
No matter how much I tried to ignore it,deep down I knew he was right.
A shaky breath escaped my lips as I leaned back into the couch.
He didn’t mean it. I told myself again,the words losing their conviction. He possibly can't mean it.
But why did those words feel like the truth
I hadn’t realized I’d fallen asleep on the couch until the sharp ring of my phone woke me. It was daybreak.
I blinked, disoriented as I answered. It was my doctor calling to let me know I was off probation, that I could finally start driving again
The news filled with me with thrill. I missed driving. It was one of my favorite things to do,a small escape.
At least now I wouldn't have to rely on Ryan to get to school anymore.
Ryan.
I shrugged the thoughts off shaking off the heaviness that clung to my skin. It's a new day, time to get up,get ready and go to school.
I stretched lazily, feeling my joints crack as I stood. One thing was certain—no sleep was more satisfying than the one that came after balling your eyes out.
I rushed through my morning routine—showered, dressed, grabbed some toasts on my way out the door. As soon as I stepped outside, I spotted Ryan’s familiar car parked in front but ignored it
Nothing will spoil my day
I won’t allow myself to break again.
With a deep breath, I finally slid into my own car, closing the door behind me. The familiar scent of the leather seats filled my senses, and I couldn't help but smile. It felt good to be back here, in control.
“Been a while, huh?” I whispered to myself, fingers brushing the wheels. The drive to school felt like freedom tasted in a long time. I didn't realize I've missed it so much not until today.
Ashley and Luke were already in class when I arrived, which was unusual since I typically get to class before Ashley. The first two periods dragged on, feeling endless and boring. Even though I resisted, I couldn't help but glance at Ryan seat. He wasn't in class today again. My eyes met Evelyn’s, who glared at me with so much disdain.I quickly averted my gaze and focused on the board. Once class was over, we headed to the cafeteria.
“You’re driving again!” Ashley squealed and pulled me into a tight hug.
“It feels to good to be back behind the wheel” I smiled. I choose to not tell Ashley what transpired between Ryan and I because I'd only give her a reason to hate Ryan.
“Let's celebrate it. Lunch on me” Her excitement was contagious and I lost myself in the moment,all my previous worries dissipating.
“You could have let me enjoyed flaunting my ride in your face for a while at least” Luke scoffed feigning annoyance.
“We'll be much better without your daily car show” Ashley shot back
We grabbed our trays, we settled at a table by the window. Just as we were about to start eating, I felt a sudden urge to use the restroom
"I'll be right back," I said, pushing my chair back. "Just need to use the restroom."
Ashley nodded, already halfway through her sandwich, and Luke gave me a quick look but didn’t say anything.
I made my way out of the cafeteria and headed to the restroom.
As soon as I stepped inside, I was met by the familiar sight of Evelyn.
She stood by the sink, casually reapplying her lipstick in the mirror. Her eyes flicked to mine through the reflection, her lips curling into a smirk.
"Going somewhere?" she sneered, turning slowly to face me.
"I’m here in the restroom, which it’s obvious what I came to do," I snapped back, trying to hold my ground.
"Right," she said, taking a few steps closer until her face was just inches from mine. "So, you're the reason Ryan's been acting a bit off lately." She scrutinized me with a mocking glint in her eyes, her lips curving into a disappointed pout. "I’m really disappointed in him. I thought he had better taste."
I swallowed hard. "I have no business with Ryan. And in case you haven’t noticed, you’re blocking my way."
Evelyn’s expression darkened, her cheeks flushing red with anger. "You’re such a rude little thing," she said, her voice rising. Without warning, she grabbed a fistful of my hair, and I winced as I tried to pull away.
"Stop! You’re hurting me!" I yelped, struggling to free myself, but her grip only tightened.
"I need to make this clear," she said, her voice dripping with malice. "Stay away from Ryan! He’s mine, and I don’t care if he’s your stepbrother. He’s not for you. He's mine alone!"
"I have no—"
"Let go of her this instant, or you'll wish you had”
The voice, sharp and commanding, made me freeze. Evelyn’s eyes widened in shock, and she quickly released my hair. I turned, and my breath caught in my throat at the sight of him—Ryan?
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