Chapter fifty two

It had been over twenty four hours. And as odd as it might sound,Nick had spent half that time trying to figure out what he would do in the event Crystal didnt wake up. And he had realised exactly what would happen if that were the case. He would cease to exist.
He would go inward on himself and detach himself from reality. All that he had ever known would no doubt make no sense to him anymore.
But there was also the tiny optimistic part of him left, it was small and almost insignificant but it was there.And for that he was grateful. It was that part that urged him to make conversation with Crystal despite him knowing that she wasnt going to reply. Not even he could recall a word of what he had told her over the last several hours, but still he kept on.
Her father had gotten there some hours back, the guilt and regret clear in his usually distinguished features. They had not said a word to each other and Nick preferred it that way, because he knew that deep down, Mr. Lockwood blamed him for what had occured. And perhaps he was right to do so.
He combed his fingers through the strands of her hair, placed a trembling hand on her cold cheek and blew out a breath. This was breaking him.
" Nick, .." He heard Miguel call out from the doorway, but he didnt turn to look at the other gentleman. Turning would take a second...a lot could happen in that one second.
" I think it's wise if you go home. Get some rest and freshen up, I promise to look after her until you return. "
" I'm good. " He was far from good, but if he left Crystal's side, he'd be much worse.
" Come on Hilton, try to be logical --"
" I said, I'm.Good! " he ground the words out, joping Miguel would get the point and let him be. And he was certain that if their roles were reversed, if it was Dahlia on that bed instead of Crystal, Miguel would not have dared leave her side. Sighing, Miguel walked out and left.
The hours passed until a new day came, and the same routine picked up. Everyone, including Crystal's dad, watched from the sidelines as Nick lost a small fraction of himself with each hour that passed. Even the doctors became concerned that if he went on as he currently was, he would soon be hospitalized along with Crystal.
Deciding to take matters into his own hands, Matt convinced Nick to go out for a walk wih him. The convincing alone took more than half an hour during which Nick pretended he couldn't hear a thing that Matt was saying before he took pity on him and gave in.
They walked to the cafeteria which was as far away as he was willing to go.
" You're losing it, you know that ?" Matt said after they sat down at one of the tables with their coffees.
" Do me a favor and keep the fucking speech to yourself, will you?"
With a shake of his head, Matt leaned against the back of his chair, taking time to casually inspect his coffee, then he looked bqck up at Nick.
" It wasn't your fault. You know that don't you?"
" I told you to let it be. The last thing I want to do is talk, "
Matt had never, in all the years he'd known Nick, seen him as distraught as he was currently. And being the only actual friend he had, he felt like it was his responsibility to fix things. He couldn't make Crystal wake up, but there was something else he could do to give the guy some closure.
" I ought to have seen this coming..." Nick suddenly said, " ...It never works out when you let your goddamned feelings get in the way and that's exactly what i did, and now look what's come out of it. "
" Are you saying you regret everything that happened between you and Crystal? "
" Of course not. " That would never be the case. And Nick was sure that if he could go back in time, he would still choose to meet Crystal like he initially had. He would still want her to be a part of his life, only this time, he'd make sure to take better care of her. He wrapped his hand tightly around his coffee, so tightly that the lid came off and the coffee began to pour over. And the hot liquid would have burnt him had Matt not taken it from him and placed it aside.
" I paid for that you know, " Matt then said. And had it been another occasion, Nick might have given a slight attempt at a smile.
" She'll be fine. You have to trust that it'll work out. Don't be such a pessimist about it all. " The words, delivered in that light and casual way that was so Matt, helped to ease Nick's mind a bit.
" She's lucky to have someone who loves her as much as you do."
" Considering that she's lying on a hospital bed, I'd say she's the exact opposite of lucky. " The words hurt to simply say, but they were true. If only they had never gone to that diner.....
" You're basically a predator capable of the unthinkable. Yet whenever she's around you, you turn onto this lovestruck person that is willing to do anything to see her smile. So trust me, she's lucky. "
Nick looked at the time, hed been away for about twenty minutes. That was fifteen minutes more than he had intended to be away. He stood up and thanked Matt for being there, ready to walk away.
" Go home Nick.Take a freaking shower and eat something. "
" Or you can go get me some clean clothes and I'll do all that from here. " Nick shot back.
With a look of pure exasperation, Matt stood. Then he crossed his arms and looked Nick straight in the eye.
" I'll drive you home. "
" I'm not GOING home, " why were they even having that conversation to begin with. The cafeteria was one thing,but there was no way he was going back home.That bastard Hines had not yet been caught. Which meant that he could very well decide to come back and finish the damn job. Which was all the more reason for him to stay be Crystal's side until she woke up. It didn't matter that there were guards outside her room keeping watch, something bad could still happen.
" I'm going back, "
" Come on Nick---"
" Don't try to convince me Matt! " Miguel had done the exact same thing and failed, severally that too. "...Look, that son of a bitch is still out there--"
" --No he's not. " Matt cut in. A very sure look on his face. Nick frowned, narrowing his eyes. If Hines had been caught he would have heard about it. He would have been the first person Saunders called.
" What do you mean? "
Picking his coffee from the table, Matt took a sip.
" I mean Hines isn't out there running around planning shit like you think he is. " Matt then said. Nick said nothing, he simply waited for his friend's clarification, but he got none. Then Matt simply walked a couple of steps away from him and turned around.
" Go home, take a shower and eat. Maybe then I'll be more willing to share. " he said and strode away. Leaving Nick with thousands of unanswered questions.