Chapter forty four

KELSEY POV


I sat on the sofa and stuffed my face with oreo ice cream. Jane and Sasha kept exchanging weird looks. I was watching a soup opera. It was very cliche but I enjoyed watching it. Besides it was interesting and it kept me entertained.

"Kelsey you know that you can't go on like this you need to tell Marcus before it's late..." Sasha begs.

I stopped eating and stared at her in disbelief before I could reply. Jane interrupted me.

"Yes Kelsey Sasha is right I mean look at you it's been weeks now and nothing has changed. You're stressing yourself and this is not good for the baby" Jane mutters quitely.

I was capable of taking care of my own child alone. I didn't need Marcus or his support.

"I think I'm handling everything alright without Marcus involved. I don't need him and he has no right to be involved in my life. He doesn't even know that the baby exists."

Sasha frowned at me.

" That's because you haven't told him anything. And If you don't tell him soon I'll do it myself" Sasha warned.

My eyes widened in shock.

" You wouldn't dare."

Sasha backed out and stood.

"I can't do this anymore. I'm done helping you Kelsey because you keep ignoring the right thing to do. Marcus might be a jerk but he has every damn right over his child and you can't deny him that."

I was furious.

" This is my child alone Sasha. And keeping it was my own damn decision so it's not your place to tell me whether to involve the father of my child or not and for Christ sake stop acting like my mother."

Jane got between us.

" Guys this is not the right time to start fighting" Jane said softly.

" I'm done wasting my time," Sasha said angrily. She collected her things and left.

"Fine go I don't care and I don't need your help either!' I yelled furiously.

I slumped on the sofa and buried my face in the pillow.

Jane sat beside me.

"I think I just lost my best friend. I ruined things between us..." I mumbled.

Jane placed a comforting hand on my shoulder.


"She meant well Kelsey she was just trying to help you...".

I wiped my tears away.

"I know..." I whispered softly.

"And you haven't lost her, she's still your friend and she'll always be here to support you."

I quickly hugged Jane and needed a hug right now.

She released me and grasped my hand gently.

" Don't get me wrong I'm not saying that you should immediately do it. But I want you to rather think about it with a calm mind and make a decision."

" Marcus deserves a chance to be part of your baby's life Kelsey. It's not easy to grow up without a father."

" You can't possibly manage to provide love for both parties. You'll always be a mother but a father's love is different and it can't be replaced by Kelsey."

" So when making that decision think about your life and most importantly your child's future."

She gave me a small smile.

" And try not to overthink things. It's not good for the baby, ok."

I nodded quietly.

" Good take care of yourself Kelsey and when you end a friend or someone to talk to just don't hesitate to call me."

Jane collected her things and left.

I felt alone and depressed. I lost my best friend all because of my stubbornness If I had just listened to her in the first place I would have still had my best friend.

I ordered some Chinese food later that night. I tried calling Sasha but she kept ignoring me. I guess I deserved the silent treatment. For the first time in my life I truly felt alone and abandoned. I was dying from the inside I just wanted to die and never wake up because my life was fucking miserable.


The next morning I went to work as usual. I barely did my makeup so I had dark circles under my eyes. I bet that I looked like a zombie. I didn't want to even look at Marcus but my efforts went in vain. The wedding plans started moving at a fast pace. I always saw Tara and Marcus everywhere. It was just so annoying.
They were even interviewed on TV and Tara was showing off her diamond ring and boy was it big Marcus had spared no expense in making that witch happy.

I was still jealous. Jealous of Tara because she was getting married to the father of my child. The man I'm madly in love with life was just messed up and it's true when they say that Karma is a bitch.
Because this was pure torture Marcus and Tara's wedding was always featured in magazines, Television ads,talk shows, articles, and billboards. I was so sick of seeing their faces all the time.

And as the days went by I was getting thinner and sick. I never went to the hospital because I thought that it was just a common cold and flu.


MARCUS POV


Tara kept dragging to talk shows and the press. She wanted our wedding to be a grand affair and honestly it felt like a fucking circus to me. I hated everything and I wanted nothing to do with this so-called wedding.

And Kelsey. She was slipping through my fingers like sand. I was losing her and it was driving me insane. The wedding had created a big gap between us and it pushed us further apart.
She looked sick and depressed.
And I just wish that I could comfort her and tell her that everything was going to be ok.
She was obviously stressing herself. I could see it.


KELSEY POV

During the night I woke up with a sharp pain in my stomach. I got out of bed trying to reach for the pain killers.
The pain shot through me again more violently this time. I slowly started walking down the stairs.

By the time I was reaching the kitchen island I was gasping for air. No this couldn't be labour, something is wrong I need to call for help.

My head was spinning and I felt dizzy. The glass of water slipped from my hands and fell to the floor.

It shattered.

I dialed the emergency hotline immediately. I felt weak and the last thing I remember is hearing sirens and passing out.

When I woke up I was in the hospital bed. Fear gripped me as I touched my stomach thank God that I was still pregnant.
I thought I lost my baby. I felt guilty for being so careless. I placed my hand over my stomach.
Bitter tears rolled down my cheeks if I had lost the baby and Marcus had found out he would have hated me.
He was always hanging out with that blonde chick Tara.



I got my driver's license last week
Just like we always talked about
'Cause you were so excited for me
To finally drive up to your house
But today I drove through the suburbs
Crying 'cause you weren't around
And you're probably with that blonde girl
Who always made me doubt
She's so much older than me
She's everything I'm insecure about
Yeah, today I drove through the suburbs
'Cause how could I ever love someone else?
And I know we weren't perfect but I've never felt this way for no one
And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay now that I'm gone
Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me
'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street
And all my friends are tired
Of hearing how much I miss you, but
I kinda feel sorry for them
'Cause they'll never know you the way that I do, yeah
Today I drove through the suburbs
And pictured I was driving home to you
And I know we weren't perfect
But I've never felt this way for no one, oh
And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay, now that I'm gone
I guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me
'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street
Red lights, stop signs
I still see your face in the white cars, front yards
Can't drive past the places we used to go to
'Cause I still fuckin' love you, babe (ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh)
Sidewalks we crossed
I still hear your voice in the traffic, we're laughing
Over all the noise
God, I'm so blue, know we're through
But I still fuckin' love you, babe (ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh)
I know we weren't perfect but I've never felt this way for no one
And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay, now that I'm gone
'Cause you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me
'Cause you said forever, now I drive alone past your street
Yeah, you said forever, now I drive alone past your street


Marcus got very suspicious when I took a two weeks break from work. I just needed to be alone and grieve on my own terms I needed to let him go and start over.